The Lovers – Alliances –
Do you dream of love, sex, connection? Hand-holding, hugging, family celebrations? You are searchingfor Alliances. An alliance is symbiotic, good for both sides of the equation. To reach out, you must firstdecide motive (“I Could Use a Friend” vs “I’m Looking For Romantic Connection”) and that you areWORTHY of connection. This last one is tricky because we are all looking to others for validation. Thisis the source of many “imposter” dreams where we find ourselves naked in front of the entire class,unprepared on Test Day.
Open Your Dream Journal – Make a list of what you want in a friend/lover, then make a list of what you are prepared to give. The lists shouldn’t be unbalanced! Are you a “giver” or a “taker”? Neither can ever be satisfied, because the music of the spheres is all about rhythm and balance.
Learn the Steps – There is much talk of “love languages”. The man who comes and digs an unsightly hole in your front yard may be awkwardly tendering a gift. The woman who doesn’t mention you’ve been talking all night with spinach in your teeth is also trying to do “something nice.” But in each case, the ultimate effect may feel “hostile” to the recipient.
There’s No Substitute for Communication – If you are hoping to communicate interest without revealing yourself you are bound for confusion and disappointment. But relax; it turns out the process of communication – trying to figure out and express who you are – is satisfyingly absorbing. It always makes you feel better, even when you meet a person who “weaponizes” honesty.
How Can That Be? – Learning to recognize Exploiters is Two-Thirds of the Game. Exploiters probe for weakness, searching for hostages. We don’t want to end up as someone else’s meal.
We can’t get through this alone, and we don’t want to. Luckily, we are surrounded by other humans,struggling, just like us. If we pledge to help each other, we can dispatch terror and celebrate joy! Comforting! But how can we tell the difference between Builders and Exploiters?
Danger – When someone is trying to destroy your self-esteem, recognize this. Even if it comes in theguise of “friendship” this person is an enemy. This is not what friends are for. When someone is tryingto “capture” you, i.e. limit and control your possibilities and behavior, that person is a hostage-takerlooking for slaves. NOT a friend.
Challenge – what are friends for? Friends are honest: “I just don’t like that dress but maybe it’s me.”Friends are forgiving, ‘I’m sorry, I was having a bad day. I know you’re sorry, too.” Friends are fun,“Let’s cheer ourselves up.” Friends are helpful: “Let’s figure a way out of this.” Are you honest,forgiving, fun-loving and helpful? You’re ready to be a friend.
Opportunity – Friends are a mirror in which we see ourselves. We can experiment with possibilities, wecan expand our reach. Our intelligence is doubled, as well as our efforts. Our sorrows are halved andour ideas are increased exponentially. Reach out! You’re getting better at the game every time you try.
Models & Mentors – “You are my sun, my moon and all my stars”
– e.e. cummings
“All that we love deeply becomes a part of us” – Helen Keller
“Love makes your soul crawl out of its hiding place” – Zora Neale Hurston
“Love is not proud or boastful, keeps no record of past mistakes – love rejoices in the truth” –
II Corinthians
“Laugh as much as you breathe, love as long as you live” – Rumi
Meditation –
#Haiku: The Lovers – Alliances
Entangled
Pair;
Four winged
Angel flying
Back to back:
Unbeatable
Alysse Aallyn 
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