Butterfly Language for Caterpillars – Soulmate Seeking with Alysse Aallyn

The Calla Lilly = FORGIVENESS “My Grandmother’s Ghost”

“Is forgiveness possible?”

In the language of flowers, the Calla Lily is forgiveness. Forgiveness is like coming home. It hypothesizes a place where the past doesn’t matter, mistakes are healed, and love conquers all. Sounds like heaven, doesn’t it?

Soulmates create heaven for each other, but we can taste and enjoy it, now. Nothing is held back.

Love requires that each desire the other’s “good.” There is no tiny part of us hoping for the other’s denigration so that we can rise. This means forswearing the Scarcity Mentality. We must believe there is enough love for us both.

Love without status, without competition. Just closeness, forgiveness and togetherness. If a Soulmate keeps pushing his Beloved into position of Enforcer, Critic, Teacher or Detective, the relationship is under such threat its future is imperiled. One can hardly be forgiven until one stops being a danger to the soul of the Beloved and the soul of the relationship. We must commit to desiring the other’s good, and to demanding health and life for ourselves.

When the Calla lily arrives at your door, not just forgiveness but absolution is in the offing. We know there can be no forgiveness for us unless we have learned to forgive others, but perhaps the hardest thing is to learn to forgive ourselves.

We must even forgive God for the pulse of history and the electricity of circumstance, for the physical web in which we are all caught. Give up trying to assess who did what to who and why; letting it all go as your eyes turn to the future.

There is no resolution in simply showing wounds or admitting wrongdoing; but there is healing available when we hold each other up in the light. But we have to want it. We must want to come home.

How many times do we have to forgive ourselves? When asked how many times we need to forgive others Jesus made the quick calculation of “seventy times seven” meaning, “a lot.” If you think about it, you’ll realize we are going to have to forgive each other and ourselves a lot more times than that! Possibly multiple times per day for the rest of our lives. Don’t we have to forgive ourselves for constantly underestimating ourselves, for saying “I can’t do this” without even trying, for insulting ourselves and verbally (and for all I know physically!) Be a loving partner to yourself so that your Beloved knows how to love you.

Meditation: We’re branches of the same tree – W.B. Yeats

My Grandmother’s Ghost

My grandmother never cried
Emmie you’re a stoic
Everyone admired her. That’s why
She haunts us; pressing her face accusingly
Against the glass beneath the stairs.
On windy nights she
Threatens God, maligns
His angels; for the little boy who died
Of scarlet fever; without once
Calling her name; and the collie dog run over
And the storm that forever uprooted
Her wedding tulips.
Mother shakes her head, says, “Poor Gran
Will never be done; she’s got
Too much grief to catch up on.”