Alysse Aallyn

Category: #Addiction

  • #DreamTherapy – Dream Journaling with Alysse Aallyn

    Recovery & Rebirth –

    The compulsion of recurring dreams torments us. These re-envisagings of past events re-enact Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder for all to see, shaming and blaming at the same time.

    My recurring dreams all involve writing, my sister’s involve the car accident she was in at four years old.  Get out your Dream Journal. Consult your Dream Buddies. Do you have recurring dreams? What are they trying to tell you?

    Don’t be afraid – You’ve got this. We’re going to change your dreamscape. We’re going to begin dreaming about rebirth.

    You’re the Pilot – “The bad news is time flies – the good news is, you’re the pilot.”  What do memories in general – these memories in particular – symbolize for you? 

    “Recovery begins to happen we repel a demonic force that kept us in thrall” – could beaddiction, illusion, corruption, compulsive behavior; even a poisonous culture.   Were we hostage to another human being who didn’t have our best interests at heart?  This requires deep thought about our best interests. As our brains clear we get ideas. Ernest Hemingway used to say we are “stronger at the broken places”; Nietzsche expressed it as “what doesn’t kill me makes me stronger”. Healing provides peace as well as joy.  We give thanks that wehave begun the journey.

    Challenge: Expect to stumble.  Watching toddlers try to “rise and walk” we consider it lucky thatthey don’t mind being laughed at. (In fact, they love it.)  It takes them time to figure out this new modality.  Like beginning skiers, they cling to objects, sway exaggeratedly back and forth, slam into others, and plop down SPLAT; not just once or twice but over and over.  In fact the toddler hasn’t been born who suddenly vaults up suavely and starts swanning around in a sophisticated manner.

    Embrace the First step of Recovery: “Expect to go splat.”  Of course we don’t WANT to –fingers crossed –  it’s dangerous and bruising.  We’d better arrange to have a friend around – just in case. But you don’t fail unless you refuse to rise again. Don’t even bother counting the times you were “brave”.  It’s only the “getting back up” that counts. As long as you’re doing that,you’re a true winner.

    Danger – Life never goes the way we planned.  There’s the excitement of finding a plan,investigating goals, making them ours, and committing to the plan – and then there’s living the plan.Suddenly we don’t know how to get through the next ten minutes –worse, we make a “big mistakes”unconsciously. The rational self we’ve planned for fails to show up and instead we turn into someirrational monster who threatens to kill when momentarily frustrated. 

    This is like sport-learning. Allow each new behavior to penetrate every fiber of your whole body. Rehearse over and over. (10,000 times?)  It’s ALL mistakes at first. Our mental concepts of “perfection” and “purity” arecompletely misplaced here; this is more like forming calluses over tender new skin. It feels funny atfirst, sore. It might actually “hurt.” We’re on the early steps of a long journey to a wonderful place;and we won’t get there unless we forgive ourselves, pick ourselves up and keep going.

    Opportunity –  We wish happiness was “automatic’ but it requires planning. Pledge to contrastplanned empowerment with benumbed abandon. Think about what this means. Who envies loss of consciousness?  Wouldn’t it be better to remove the source of the pain, the shame we are escaping from? Is this nostalgic fantasy really some faint memory of union, with an equally desperate hordestanding in for the lost, beloved Other? What would it mean to give up these blind yearnings, thiscultivated pain and these unbearable memories to lead a fresh, released and intentional life? It means accepting and becoming a new self in all our exquisitely uniqueness, exploring everything that implies. It doesn’t mean we’ll never have another recurring dream. Dreams become a conversation we are having with our deepest selves, by the light of the universe. Recovery is “self-forgiveness”;going forward with a clear-eyed, honest appraisal of ourselves, resources and desires. “I am free”

    Models & Mentors – “Rock bottom became the solid foundation on which I rebuilt my life” – J.K. Rowling

    “The airplane takes off against the wind, not with it” – Henry Ford

    “Believe you can and you’re halfway there” – Theodore Roosevelt

    “The best way to predict your future is to create it” – Abraham Lincoln

    Meditation –

    #Haiku: Recovery = Rebirth

    Mulligan –

    Rare gift;

    A “do-over”

    ‘Cause you DO know

    What you know now

  • #DreamTherapy – Dream Journaling with Alysse Aallyn

    Rainbow – Serendipity – 

    Do You Dream of Pots of Gold?  Magic transferences? Breaks in the laws of physics benefiting only you?

    You Were Born Lucky – Consider: What is the greatest piece of good luck you’ve ever had? Your parentage? Talents? Home town? Best friend? A piece of advice? A special teacher? Think about it. Have you ever been offered apiece of good luck you couldn’t take advantage of, but wish you had?

    How lucky do you NEED to be? Are you familiar with the faces of gamblers seated hour by hour at the slot machines, wearing special gloves so their skin doesn’t fall off? Seriously, who would want to be them? Is it luck itself that wegive thanks for, or our ability to recognize good fortune? Perhaps it’s our ability to take advantage of a piece of good luck when we’re offered it. These memories have one thing in common- i.e. “ability”, which is not luck, which is YOU. Give thanks for these abilities. Let’s learn to develop them. Open up your Dream Journal.

    Challenge – A different way of thinking about fortune is not all the wonderful things that didn’thappen, but the terrible things that COULD have happened – and didn’t. In other words, let’s tryadopting a “glass half full” perspective and see how far that gets us.

    Danger – The danger is always the same – giving control of our psyche over to some other entitythat may not (almost certainly doesn’t) have our best interests at heart. We’re usually not evenaware we’re doing this. But when you want to “be lucky” what does that mean? In whose eyes?Let’s put ourselves firmly in the driver’s seat and take a look at the path ahead. Do we want to gothere? Do we really trust these people? Are we the dog throwing away a real bone to reach theillusory bone we see pictured in the watery reflection of Aesop’s Fable?

    Opportunity – As we negotiate our mortal existence we have a unique opportunity to takeadvantage of chance appearances and encounters – that’s serendipity. If we recognize them. Thenwe can compare our steps to the immortal framework of eternity and ask, How am I doing?

    Models & Mentors – “Serendipity is when you find things that you weren’t looking for because what you are looking for is so damned difficult”

    – Erin McKean

    “Steer into the skid” – Alysse Aallyn

    “Here you are moving ahead bravely in spite of everything going wrong” – Rithvik Singh

    “Take advantage of happy accidents” – Vincent van Gogh

    “There are no coincidences” – Sigmund Freud

    Meditation –

    #Haiku: Rainbow – Serendipity

    Happenstance –

    Fortuitous

    Chance; we’re

    Born lucky

    We just don’t know it.

  • #DreamTherapy – Dream Journaling with Alysse Aallyn

    The Lovers – Alliances –

    Do you dream of love, sex, connection? Hand-holding, hugging, family celebrations? You are searchingfor Alliances. An alliance is symbiotic, good for both sides of the equation. To reach out, you must firstdecide motive (“I Could Use a Friend” vs “I’m Looking For Romantic Connection”) and that you areWORTHY of connection. This last one is tricky because we are all looking to others for validation.  Thisis the source of many “imposter” dreams where we find ourselves naked in front of the entire class,unprepared on Test Day.

    Open Your Dream Journal – Make a list of what you want in a friend/lover, then make a list of what you are prepared to give. The lists shouldn’t be unbalanced! Are you a “giver” or a “taker”? Neither can ever be satisfied, because the music of the spheres is all about rhythm and balance.

    Learn the Steps – There is much talk of “love languages”. The man who comes and digs an unsightly hole in your front yard may be awkwardly tendering a gift. The woman who doesn’t mention you’ve been talking all night with spinach in your teeth is also trying to do “something nice.”  But in each case, the ultimate effect may feel “hostile” to the recipient.

    There’s No Substitute for Communication – If you are hoping to communicate interest without revealing yourself you are bound for confusion and disappointment. But relax; it turns out the process of communication – trying to figure out and express who you are – is satisfyingly absorbing. It always makes you feel better, even when you meet a person who “weaponizes” honesty.

    How Can That Be? – Learning to recognize Exploiters is Two-Thirds of the Game. Exploiters probe for weakness, searching for hostages. We don’t want to end up as someone else’s meal.

    We can’t get through this alone, and we don’t want to. Luckily, we are surrounded by other humans,struggling, just like us.  If we pledge to help each other, we can dispatch terror and celebrate joy! Comforting! But how can we tell the difference between Builders and Exploiters?

    Danger  – When someone is trying to destroy your self-esteem, recognize this. Even if it comes in theguise of “friendship” this person is an enemy. This is not what  friends are for. When someone is tryingto “capture” you, i.e. limit and control your possibilities and behavior, that person is a hostage-takerlooking for slaves. NOT a friend.

    Challenge – what are friends for? Friends are honest: “I just don’t like that dress but maybe it’s me.”Friends are forgiving, ‘I’m sorry, I was having a bad day. I know you’re sorry, too.”  Friends  are fun,“Let’s cheer ourselves up.” Friends are helpful: “Let’s figure a way out of this.” Are you honest,forgiving,  fun-loving and helpful? You’re ready to be a friend.

    Opportunity – Friends are a mirror in which we see ourselves. We can experiment with possibilities, wecan expand our reach.  Our intelligence is doubled, as well as our efforts.  Our sorrows are halved andour ideas are increased exponentially.  Reach out! You’re getting better at the game every time you try.

    Models & Mentors – “You are my sun, my moon and all my stars”

    – e.e. cummings

    “All that we love deeply becomes a part of us” – Helen Keller

    “Love makes your soul crawl out of its hiding place” – Zora Neale Hurston

    “Love is not proud or boastful, keeps no record of past mistakes – love rejoices in the truth” –

    II Corinthians

    “Laugh as much as you breathe, love as long as you live” – Rumi

    Meditation –

    #Haiku: The Lovers – Alliances

    Entangled

    Pair;

    Four winged

    Angel flying

    Back to back:

    Unbeatable

  • #Dream Therapy – Dream Journaling with Alysse Aallyn

    Conflict – Do you dream of danger? Natural disasters like storms, volcanoes and flooding?  Do you dream of war, of robbery, home invasion? Or do you dream about your loved one’s face turning bitter and their words cutting sharply?  Conflict is inevitable.  It is necessary – birth pangs seem terrifying and sex can look like war. In dreams we rehearse our fears until some of us fear to dream.

      You are a Force Field.  You are a magnet for desire, change, for evolution itself. This comes byvirtue of being born, assuming your physical incarnational state. Others may tell you to standback, take your place in line or wait your turn but your appearance into this chaotic universetriggered no such guarantee. We are here to learn to use our power.

      CHALLENGE – Force stirs up resistance.  Actions create re-action as we swing back and forth inour determination and direction. We clash and crash.  Sometimes we regret it bitterly, “why did Ido that?”  Sometimes we fear loss or harm so much we are immobilized.  The challenge is toassume your stride, elucidate your goals and plan a direction. Get out your dream Journal. Consult your dream buddies.

      DANGER – It’s all too easy to make others fear you. The one with the biggest weapon THINKShe wins every fight. But what looks like compliance to you could be revolution – you will betoppled and lose your heart’s desire.

      OPPORTUNITY – Learning to use conflict constructively and creatively is a Superpower.  Otherpeople are force fields, too. If there is any way to blend these powers and head in the samedirection, we will be invincible. 

      Models & Mentors –  “I used to tell myself, boy, if you can survive this, you can survive anything” – Tom Lichtenberg

      “Laughter is the proof that our tragedies don’t define us. Laughter is the survivor’s language” – Josh James

      “Cancer didn’t bring me to my knees, it brought me to my feet”

      – Michael Douglas

      “If you want to awaken humanity, awaken yourself. If you want to eliminate suffering, eliminate what is negative in yourself. Your gift to the world is our self-transformation.” – Lao Tzu

      MEDITATION –

      #Haiku: The Storm

      Battle mode:

      Sludge

      Rears up

      Eyes bug

      Mouth gapes

      Shrieks

      “No!”

      Anticipates

      “Yes”

    1. Dream Group – Dream Journaling with Alysse Aallyn

      REGRET – Many anxiety dreams are about regret.  When we try to impartially study our dream content, the moods flood in, rocking our precarious stability.  Why are people so afraid of lookinginside? Because of Regret, that’s why. The things we’ve already done that we can never change. Seemingly hopeless sorrow builds – now we are helpless, we hate ourselves and we can’t fix anything. We are in for a bad, cold, frigid winter of discontent.

        YOU CAN LIGHTEN YOUR OWN LOAD – No one can do it but you. When you serve as prosecutorin your own life – guess what? – that’s not fair. Fundamental Attribution Error is people blamingindividuals for actions that were the result of systems; mass decisions or circumstances over which theyhad no actual control. Look into it, if you want to. (Sometimes we need to.) Or you can just forgive yourself and move on. After all, we’ve got the future to think of.

        CHALLENGE – Let’s get out our Dream Journal. What would you change NOW? How doyou WANT to change? Forgive yourself. You were held hostage by fortune (we all were)and you went full-on Stockholm Syndrome and identified with your attackers and tried toplease them. (We all did. It’s called Society.) Now you’re madder at yourself than you areat them. Forgive yourself. We’re starting a new life. One where it’s US who’s in charge.

        DANGER – You’re in another part of the forest. Surprise! This wasn’t the plan but here you are. TheDanger is always that you’ll give up. Surrender. Don’t. You can easily see from every fairy tale andhero’s journey you’ve ever studied that now we’re getting to the Good Part. By testing your muscle, youGROW your muscle. If your muscle is never tested, it withers. So let’s go!

        OPPORTUNITY – We don’t know everything. Even Jesus demonstrated surprise about the way thingsturned out. Be gentle as a dove, he advised, but wily as a serpent. Serpents can get out of anything. (Aska herpetologist.) And so can you. It’s just a bigger world than we knew – both inner and outer – so getmapping. I guarantee you – IT GETS BETTER.

        Models & Mentors –  “I’d rather regret the things I’ve done than the things I haven’t done.”

        – Lucille Ball

        “There are no regrets in life, only lessons.” – Jennifer Aniston

        “We have only one life, and the second life begins the moment we realize that fact” – Confucius

        “I was designed by my Creator to not only feel pain and love but to become whole inside it. I am a Warrior” –Glennon Doyle

        “Autumn, the year’s last, loveliest smile” – William Cullen Bryant

        MEDITATION –

        #Haiku: Regret

        Coulda

        Woulda

        Shoulda

        Didn’t. Now you

        Wish

        Things

        Different.

        Clean slate.

        Write.

      1. Dream Group – Dream Journaling with Alysse Aallyn

        DREAM CONTENT – RELAX – Take a deep breath as you face the content of your dreams.  

          YOU HAVE INNER RESOURCES – FOCUS your power by closing your eyes and – relaxing. Are youafraid you might fall asleep? So much the better – we need these dreams to be our map and guide.Dreaming of hot summers, beach, umbrellas, ocean, sand? You are longing for a “getaway” and the verybest and most refreshing vacation is to disappear inside yourself. Let’s learn to “see” with that Third Eye– the Wisdom Eye. Like every effort, it takes not just concentration but practice.

          DREAMS OF REAL EVENTS –  Is your brain flipping through its memories, disguising them, trying to make sense of them or imagining horrific detours? These are anxiety dreams. You fear that the causality of existence is basically nonsensical and cruel. The cure? Develop a “human flourishing” worldview. Use your models and mentors to investigate the requirements of life enhancement. What about love? When your dreams fear it doesn’t exist, you need to develop loving relationships in your daytime life.

          DREAMS OF FICTIONAL EVENTS – Are you trying to process fiction read about and seen (often dystopian). Your shy heart is shocked to its core and your inexperienced brain is trying to make sense of it. But we know much online fiction is a race to the bottom, trying again and again to go over the top.

          PRACTICE SELF-CARE – Prioritize your well-being. If you spend four hours a day watching or playing nonsensical vitriolic junk, you should spend equal time on your improvement and self-soothing regimens. Think of it. EQUAL TIME. Obviously you need to start developing self-care regimens that are way more pleasurable than passive viewing.

          CHALLENGE – Check your immortal soul. Don’t think you have one? No wonder you’re scared, if you reduce yourself to chaff like yesterday’s lawn clippings!  You are certainly aware that all of human history has been devoted to exploring whether we have souls, where they come from and what happens to them. Probably you like – everyone –  is turned off by the idea that in order to have a soul you need to follow some religion’s requirements, laid down for you by its boss.

          But seriously, think about it. If part of yourself is immortal, with supernatural capabilities, doesn’t it, by definition, exist OUTSIDE all that stuff? Who put them in charge? If your immortal soul is the freest part of you, set it free indeed.  Use your imagination to imagine THOSE possibilities, instead of scaring yourself almost to death. And then – relax. 

          Inside yourself is you find everyone you have ever known, everyone you have ever loved, is there. Ifthat’s a tough one – and I know it’s making you gulp – here’s one tougher – everyone you ever WILLknow is in there too. You can learn to reach forwards as well as back. No, it doesn’t come immediately. But the exciting news is – you have all the time in the world.

          DANGER – You fear you will lose yourself. The worst fear is that you have no self to lose. You areyoung at this, and fresh, naïve and simple. A beginner. Accept that power. It is a wonderful thing whenthe baby begins to see. But what about Evil?  Isn’t that a thing? If I have Everything inside, then don’t Ihave Evil, too. And the mystic answer is Yes. But it can’t hurt you if you don the armor. The armor isLove, and I recommend you begin to study the subject. It isn’t strong enough yet, but you can strengthenit by Will. You must educate your will.

          OPPORTUNITY – You realize now that our dreams are forcing a choice – it really comes down to thatone thing – you must choose between Evil or Love. Evil promises it will “get the job done”, it will offer“special” unique opportunities, single you out for goodies, bring you hostages and slaves. But here’s theFact about Evil – it breaks all its promises because IT BREAKS YOU. Love promises Eternity and Joy,and it takes effort. It takes discernment, knowledge, commitment and growth. Love asks you to enter aprocess. Evil says you can just “take”, or even lie inert and be showered with benefits. One choice makes you beautiful, an athlete of the Soul, the other makes you hideously ugly, a blot that sucks in lightand depresses all who look at it.  Will you make mistakes? Inevitably. But we have been assured by the greatest minds of all time that we cannot lose. So, relax. 

          Models & Mentors: “Everything you want is on the other side of fear” – Jack Canfield

          “What you think, you become. What you feel, you attract. What you imagine, you become” – Buddha

          “You can’t stop the waves but you can learn how to surf” – Jon Kabat-Zinn

          “It takes courage to say yes to rest and play in a world where exhaustion is a status symbol” – Brene Brown

          ‘You are the silent watcher of your thoughts. You are the stillness beneath the mental noise. You are the joy beneath the love and pain” – Eckhart Tolle

        1. Dream Group – Dream Journaling with Alysse Aallyn

          Danger – Risk –

          Do You Fear Sleep? Afraid of nightmares? Do you wake up gasping and trying to forget what you’ve just experienced?

          Nightmares mean you’re paying attention. Life is scary, but we need to grow, and growth requires we learn to cultivate risk if we are ever to expand and venture outside our comfort zone.

          Challenge – Study risk intelligently. No point being afraid of dragons if dragons are only symbolic. No point being “afraid” of “foreigners” if the man telling us to be afraid has a reputation for befriending people and then fleecing them.

          Evaluatng Risk :

          1. Don’t rely on rumor and innuendo
          2. Dangers provably Real
          3. Dangers Historically verified by data: “How likely is injury?”
          4. Assemble Risk avoidance strategies that have performed well for others in your situation.
          5. What exactly is your situation? Quantify.
          6. Know who your friends are
          7. Be prepared to alter strategy to maximize success and to learn from mistakes

          Opportunity – You get to find out who your friends are. Friends want the best for you, but the relationship must be reciprocal. You have each other’s backs. Know the difference between a Team and a Gang. Gangs work to suck power from individual members and concentrate it in one individual. Teams work for the success of all. Coach can’t win if the team doesn’t win.

          Surrender is The Worst Alternative – Be alert to the danger of trauma bonding in which we try to pacify attackers by taking their side. Doesn’t work.

          Models & Mentors – “Extreme Fear can neither fight nor fly.”
          – William Shakespeare

          “Courage is resistance to fear, mastery of fear, not absence of fear”

          – Mark Twain

          “If you try to get rid of fear and anger without knowing their meaning, they will return stronger” – Deepak Chopra

          “We’re more often frightened than hurt, and we suffer more from imagination than reality.” – Seneca

          Meditation –

          Haiku: Risk

          Regret
          Fear of
          Fearlessness: Launch
          Wise adventures

        2. Dream Group – Dream Journaling with Alysse Aallyn

          THE GODDESS – POWER

            DO YOU DREAM OF MAGIC?  Magical people, animals, happenings? It is the purview of dreams to manifest supernatural happenings. The Goddess represents the power – the force – to get things doneand to bend unfriendly circumstances to your desire and will. If dreams are wishes, this is understandable, because isn’t that what we all want – a little magic?

            BEHIND THE WISH, LIES THE FEAR – Do we long to be the 8-ball, to control the 8-ball or to be under the 8-ball? Don’t we fear all these at the same time?

            RECOGNIZE YOUR POWER – You are iconic. The Goddess suggests your yearning to discover theinherent magic that is especially, irreplaceably You. You have a power no one else has, incorporated inyour being, your possibilities, your desires and your memories.  This takes a lifetime to accept becausewe all fantasize being Someone Else and experiencing existence through the armor of Having only an Outside instead of just the very vulnerable Inside in which we all feel imprisoned. Your dreams bring allthese passions together as psychic poetry, elucidating what you think you want, what you hope you wantand what you are afraid you want. The ultimate magic is to seize conscious control of this potent powersource. Invite the Dream.

            CHALLENGE OF THE DREAM – The challenge is to truly connect with others, reveal our worldInside, and avoid blasting their apparently impenetrable Outside with our terror, our longing and ourfear.

            DREAM DANGERS – We must never take hostages and we must never become a hostage. Freedom is afine line to walk. If we wish to reach out, we must treat others with respect and claim like respect forourselves. Accept your dreams as “experiments”; do not fear them but learn to look at them, impartially, as messages from the Other World. Allow them to take you where you need to go.

            DREAM OPPORTUNITIES – There will be stumbles and terrors aplenty, also successes that LOOKlike stumbles and terrors, but which we only realize on reflection were real leaps forward. This is whywe must carefully assess our daily efforts without being harsh with ourselves. You are your own MostBeloved Child. Speak gently to yourself as you would to a most treasured child.. It is not selfish tocommit to this belief, it is simply placing the oxygen mask over your own face FIRST so that you canadminister this life-saving force to others. Find someone with whom you can share your dream journey,without fear or judgment. This connection will teach us everything we need to know about how toconnect with others. Explore Models and Mentors – this is how we learn.

            “I awoke to find the rest of the world still asleep” – Leonardo Da Vinci

            “Marvelous the dream and great the terror: we must treasure the dream no matter the terror.” – Anonymous, The Epic of Gilgamesh

            “In dreams we betray ourselves

            In betrayal we discover ourselves

            In self-discovery we lose our innocence

            In loss of innocence we gain knowledge

            In knowledge we gain wisdom

            In wisdom we recover innocence.”

            -Brother Antoninus 

            MEDITATION –

            #Haiku: The Goddess

            Manifest your

            Brave,

            Burnished; brutalized

            Carapace.

            Gaze.  Accept.

            Love.

          1. Dream Group – Dream Journaling with Alysse Aallyn

            FOREST DREAMS = THE LIFE FORCE, ENERGY

              ARE YOU LOST?  Do you dream of nature, forests, trees, overgrowth? As you you’re your eyes and fall into the moss, does the forest speak to you, become your friend?

              DEFEATING NIGHTMARES – In your terror, the forest is a hostile place, determined to punish you for invading its magnificence. Fear is a reaction, but courage is a choice. Speak to the forest, apologize for the cruelties of the past, and promise to listen to its song in future.

              JOURNALING –  You need to find yourself. Your own map is the only way through. These dreamspulse with an energy that is gathering within you as you ready yourself for some great task.

              YOU ARE A POWER – You struggle to find your force. You feel the power and strength of undefinedwishes and the longing to create your place in the world. No guide exists to this wilderness, you willhave to map this forest yourself. Be brave.

              CHALLENGE – There are plenty of traps ahead. Do not become discouraged. Accept that the flow ofenergy pulses with your every heartbeat, with your sleep/rest cycle, with the obligations you willinglyseek to smooth your path.

              DANGERS – Some of these obligations become too heavy, others seek to deter you from your setcourse. Still others offer false maps that seem to promise the ease of “I don’t have to do this alone.” Weare all alone inside our heads and you – and only you – must be satisfied with the map you create. If youaren’t there’s no fellowship or wealth that can compensate you for that loss. When the forest loves you, you must love it back.

              OPPORTUNITIES – We revel in and with our fellow travelers. There could be a soulmate among them– for a time or for a life. Accept the wisdom of others, the wisdom of the path, consult other maps indesigning your own. Be prepared to alter your map – joyously – with each new and fresh discovery. There will be many. Open your Dream Journal. Close your eyes. And draw your future. Salut!

              MEDITATION –

              #Haiku: The Life Force

              Energy

              Resurge

              Depower dread

              Repower health

              Refocus

              Aim

            1. Becoming a Goddess – the Goddess Oracle by Alysse Aallyn

              Fire Goddess– Forgiveness –

              The Fire Goddess Forgives – But it hurts. Because true forgiveness transforms. 

              What Is Forgiveness? There are two kinds – dismissal (i.e. handing over to God) and actual forgiveness. Actual forgiveness is a re-birthing process, where a relationship starts again, building and growing, just like a person. And that hurts, not just because of all the little cuts and scrapes that come with growth but because it risks recurrence of the disaster that required forgiveness in the first place.

              Dismissal is an acknowledgement that no relationship is possible. The offender is handed over to God, and never thought of again. The wounded work on processing the harm with disaster specialists.

              Forgiveness Hurts the Forgiven and Forgiver – It hurts to forgive and it hurts to be forgiven. But God requires us to forgive so that we can be forgiven. This is a serious charge, we need to work on it as long as possible. 

              Do you need to forgive? Or be forgiven? Most of us require both! Ask your dreams. Sometimes we dream of a home that no longer exists, or never existed. “Home” represents “unconditional love”, the state of psychic absolution where all mistakes are forgiven and forgotten.

              Goddesses Create the Future – We commit to the ultimate compassion that we are all in this together. Jesus suggests that understanding doesn’t arrive until we learn to be “forgivers”. Obviously, this means we must learn – somehow – to forgive ourselves.

              Goddesses Create Heaven – Such forgiveness helps us achieve the state of spiritual lightness that allows a goddess to float through time, history, even the universe.

              Goddesses Are at Home In the World – What’s your “dream home”? A goddess’s training emphasizes understanding and managing the fragility of the human body and the objective world, and accepting our healing and unifying mandate. Once we have scoped out the terrain and the inhabitants, Goddesses are at “home” anywhere.

              Goddesses are About Justice – But not the kind that leaves more brokenness behind. Goddess achievements and physical selves display the triumph of thought, will and love.

              What Does It Mean to “Start Over”? – We don’t wish to be free of “consequences”. We want to learn and grow from our mistakes but not be humiliated and punished for them. Pretending they didn’t happen doesn’t free us. Seeing our mistakes as moves in a dance we are all contributing to frees us from painful rumination and helps escape and explain the prison of blame. “I did this because you …”  Human interactions are a tar-pit in which we trap and tar ourselves. We realize we need to forgive every chain in the event pattern if we are ever to have any peace.

              It’s All About You – Robert Frost defines “home” as a place where, when you show up, they have to take you in. Defining “they” defines your group, your original home. Philosophy may provide an answer. Buddhists see history as a circle, Christians as a spiral. The question for Christians is, which direction is the spiral headed and do we have time to learn what we need to know before there’s a cataclysm?  Can you define the mess we’re in and intuit your behavioral contribution? Is it possible to detach from the mess? In what group – or even in what “moment” can you detach from the mess?

              Goddess Danger – We can’t afford to get mixed up about right and wrong. “By their fruits shall you know them.” Think it through. One avenue leads to health, dignity and growth; the other leads in the opposite direction.  Don’t make the mistake of “fundamental attribution error”. The threat is NOT coming from inside the house. Martin Luther King Jr. made the wise comment that our specific brand of capitalism tends toward is “socialism for the rich and rugged individualism for the rest of us.” It certainly suits corporations to lecture their employees on building a better world without incorporating any of those ideas into the bigger picture, where we have no control and they demand absolute freedom.

              What Is the Bigger Picture? Health and safety for all living things to achieve their growth potential as part of a harmonious, non-exploitative whole. It is key that our resistance – which is necessary and life-giving – not embitter us.

              Forgiveness Is Our Armor – Forgiveness doesn’t require ignoring the past or accepting bad behavior. It’s part of an interaction where forgiveness is a request, not a demand. Usually there is a recognition of fault or an expression of remorse: “I’ll never do that again!” When the requesting party instead seeks permission for the suffering to continue, “I can’t change – that’s the way I am” — that’s toxic – a recipe for dismissal. “Home” is not re-created that way. Hell is. Your opportunity is to point this out – if necessary, (because of safety) only to yourself. “If I’m not willing to try giving up my participation in this suffering because I think I’m not able to, then this pattern will continually get worse.” Time to construct a better – more intelligent map.

              Models & Mentors – “It’s not an easy journey to get to a place where you forgive people. But it’s a powerful place, because it frees you” – Tyler Perry

              “The practice of forgiveness is our most important contribution to the healing of the world”

              – Marianne Williamson

              “The weak can’t forgive. Forgiveness is an attribute of the strong” – Mahatma Gandhi

              “To forgive one another, we must understand one another” – Emma Goldman

              “Forgiveness does not exonerate the perpetrator. It liberates the victim. It’s a gift you give yourself” – T.D. Jakes

              #Haiku: Forgiveness

              Returning home with

              Newborn eyes

              Strong hands

              Fresh translations

              Future’s past