Alysse Aallyn

Category: #Family

  • #DreamTherapy – Dream Journaling with Alysse Aallyn

    Mystery – Faith – Do you dream of apocalypses? Religious iconography? Are you a mystery fan but irritated and underwhelmed by most “solutions”? How much uncertainty can you tolerate? Are you afraid of the dark? Chronically underslept? Fear being alone? You have a profound need for faith in your life.

    The Faithful Are Rewarded – Untrusting people are untrusted. Everyone knows this, so we often rush to trust where it isn’t warranted, then enter a cycle of disappointment, yearning and ill-placed hope that drives our mood still lower. We need somebody and something to rely on. How can we find them?

    Challenge – “People don’t remember what you said, they remember how you made them feel.” Recall your childhood – the people you loved and trusted and the people you were scared of and nervous about. You were developing a “gut instinct.” Who were the friends that stayed with you in the face of adversity and who were the ones who dropped away? Open your Dream Journal and remember.

    Love always makes the difference. It is the magic lubricant that soothes and heals life’s inevitable bumps and scrapes. People who offer real love you can have faith in, people who offer something else – status, belonging, self-serving rationales – disappoint us. Faith gets stronger the more it is proved. We hope for a good day, but we have faith that the sun will come up.

    Danger – Sometimes the mysteries of life are deliberate confusions to keep us confused. Why can’t our politicians ever inaugurate the policies that are the reason we elected them in the first place? Often they try to convince us that “secret cabals” and “unknown enemies” are at fault. They want us angry and befuddled so we won’t place the blame where it belongs and demand accountability. Any secrecy serves the purposes of darkness. Demand transparency. Demand accountability. Outline your beliefs and act on them. Some mystery is endemic to existence but why people sharply change direction usually is not. We need less smoke and mirrors and more visible step by step upgrades we can all agree upon.

    Opportunity – We are continually deepening the level of mystery in our lives – just for fun. We solve the puzzles that mystified us as children and keep solving until we come to the puzzles no one can solve. But we keep trying! The limits and un-limits of physics and space are constantly in the process of being mapped. We are content no more with a ready-made label “here be dragons” placed across the unknown as a barrier to our quest. We no longer believe God resents and punishes exploration, science and development. A vaccine was developed against a mystery illness in just one year. Insoluble mysteries often center around human motivations.

    The greatest mystery of all is: Why do we make ourselves miserable? Artists teach us that even the most difficult questions can be “solved” by just posing them differently. “Re-framing.” Depth psychologists tell us that the shallow reasoning of our surface mind is far less important to long-term workable solutions than the deep memories and drives we can uncover through emotional and analytic spelunking.


    Sometimes we feel a force outside ourselves encouraging us and revealing mysterious solutions through sudden insights and analogous thinking.

    Story thinking reveals purposes to us in dreams as we puzzle out their meaning. Read Bruno Bettelheim’s The Uses of Enchantment to uncover the basis of ancient communication through folktales. These form the collective unconscious on which meaning itself relies. Love mysteries. Allow your faith to develop. Never give up.

    Models & Mentors – “Faith is taking the first step when you don’t see the whole staircase” – Martin Luther King Jr.

    “Stay awake, stand firm in your faith, be brave, be strong.” – 1 Corinthians 16:13

    “Faith includes noticing the mess, the emptiness and discomfort, and letting it be there till some light returns” – Anne LaMott

    “If we fight with faith, we are twice armed” – Plato

    Mantra – “I believe”

    Meditation –

    #Haiku: Mystery – Faith

    Our brains
    Fill patterns
    See design
    Request
    Completion
    Dream
    Intention

  • #DreamTherapy – Dream Journaling with Alysse Aallyn

    The Path – Goals – Do you dream of paths diverging in a yellow wood? Checklists? Maps? Are you talking to yourself as you follow your routine? What IS your routine? How has your routine evolved? What efforts have you made to change it to newly perceived needs and discoveries? Or is your routine formed outside you, for the benefit of others?

    If You Have No Goal, Any Path Will Take You There – But you won’t like where you end up. Besides, you DO have a goal, (at least one). Sometimes it’s something as simple as “stopping the pain” or “staying healthy.” As you become more adept at change, you realize dividing effort into “steps” to achieve a goal is critical.

    The Doctor Says Change – Most of us are familiar with being confronted at the doctor’s office with the undeniable fact that he American diet has not been good for our bodies. It’s not kind to our brains or our joints, and if we are going to preserve such things we are going to have to make some changes. Example: the intimidating goal of losing 50 pounds. Yes you can take expensive medication that will make you sick, or you, personally, can change. That won’t happen fast. Your conscious, subconscious, unconscious and collective unconscious (not to mention your pre-conscious!) are going to kick up a helluva fuss. Studying the history of human weight loss attempts we see that if you are not ready for the psychic pushback your body will actually double down and accelerate its weight gain. The same thing happens with alcoholism and drug addiction – trying to “control “ it often drives the supplicant deeper into their disease in a panicked reaction to the “loss” of supply.

    Challenge – But you can be ready. Open your Dream Journal. This is nothing more than the sore-muscled athlete, Day 2, thinking, I CAN’T DO THIS. Guess what? EVERYBODY THINKS THAT! Expect it! You treat yourself with loving compassion and cold compresses, hot baths and massage. In other words, there is an established map, a way to GETH THROUGH THIS. The challenge is to apply such a map to yourself, and then TAILOR and CUSTOMIZE it to your goals.

    Danger – Don’t go it alone. A side effect of “lessening supply” is “crazy thinking.” You will hear yourself say things like, “Nobody cares about me so I’ll just drink myself to death”; or “I WANT TO DISAPPEAR INTO THIS VAT OF ICE CREAM.” We all need somebody to talk us off the ledge, somebody who is familiar with not just our goals but what we are going through. Your id is holding the rest of you hostage, and you need an experienced hostage negotiator. So, don’t try making it through this crisis without a buddy AND a coach. AA has an acronym – HALT representing:
    Hungry
    Angry
    Lonely
    Tired
    These are the emotion states in which you make Bad Decisions. So when you see this condition developing – Halt. Call your hostage negotiator immediately.

    Opportunity – You will change! That’s the guarantee! You can’t go back to your old self. We can’t dip our fingers in the same river twice, and it turns out all addictions are an attempt to honor a past golden moment that can never, by definition, return. But you know what’s more interesting? Figuring out what that golden moment was, how it was caused, what it represents, and where the emotion you treasured is in your present life. And if it’ not there, how to get it. Trust me, there’s a world of love out there. If in doubt, see the movie UP. Now watch it again.

    Models & Mentors – “Setting goals is the first step into turning the invisible into the visible” – Tony Robbins

    “If you want to live a happy life, tie it to a goal, not people or things”
    – Albert Einstein

    “A goal without a plan is just a wish” – Antoine St. Exupery

    “Always remember your focus determines your reality” – George Lucas

    Mantra – “I Plan”

    Meditation –

    #Haiku: Goals

    Courage is
    Constant map redesign:
    Looking backward
    Planning forward

  • #DreamTherapy – Dream Journaling with Alysse Aallyn

    Transformation – Metamorphosis – Are you a SciFi fan? Do you dream of bionic humans? Robots? Cryogenics? How about caterpillars becoming moths and butterflies? Acorns don’t look like oak trees, pollywogs don’t resemble frogs. It is quite common in nature to evolve into some unexpected form. What a metaphor for us, as Ovid’s Metamorphoses postulated centuries ago. We speculate about humans becoming invisible, disguising themselves as bats or wolves; Greek gods “became” swans and bulls to serve their purposes. Our imagination is rich with all these possibilities, as is our literature, theatre and film. At a funeral, we look at a bird invading the church is a whole new light. Is it a message? An incarnation?

    You Contain Multitudes – Every time you buy a bottle with an animal on the label you are calling on the powers of that creature just as your ancestors did. We suspect eating the flesh of creatures might confer their powers. We‘ve also heard the legend that when a human husk breathes its last, the soul escapes and may reincarnate in heaven or another life as something different, without blemish, wholly beautiful for once and for all.

    Challenge – Who’s your power animal? What supernatural gifts do you desire? Give yourself the freedom to think about the gifts you yearn for and the purposes you’d put them to. You can define yourself this way, experiment and play. You might not wish to be a dragon every day of the week, but once in a while it could be fun. How can you cultivate these gifts, desires and yearnings in your present-day life? Open your Dream Journal and spend some time considering. Don’t these dreams make you a bigger, more important person, even if nobody knows? What if they did know? How might you tell them and who would you tell?

    Danger – We don’t want to jump off buildings pretending we can fly. We’re expanding our psychic repertoire, not trying to escape into fantasy. The most commonly yearned for gift is omnipotence. But think how terrible life would be – not just for others but for YOU if your whims and fantasies were never checked? Often our wish is that we be spared the pain of growing up. But who wants to remain a toddler forever? As we get older we are REALLY coming into our own and knowing and sharing our true self. A joy not to be missed. Pity the toddler who prays to fly through the air so he doesn’t have to learn to walk and risk falling down.

    Opportunity – These metaphors are a great way to connect with others on a psychic level. It’s not just fun finding people to share our dreams and games, it’ a bonding experience. We are the Tiger people! We are the Mastodons! We are the Raptors! Every member of the team adds skills to create a Group Being who is stronger than all of us, and who could become our family and community.

    Models & Mentors – “Nothing gets transformed in your life until your mind is transformed” – Ifeanyl Enoch Onuoha

    “Every success story is a tale or adaptation, constant revision, and change”
    – Richard Branson

    “Perfection is constant transformation” – Nia Peeples

    “The secret of change is to focus all of your energy not fighting the old but building the new” – Socrates

    Mantra – “I become”

    Meditation –

    #Haiku: Transformation – Metamorphosis

    Cells
    Seed change;
    Unwilled at birth;
    Conscious in adulthood:
    What
    Will you be?

  • #DreamTherapy – Dream Journaling with Alysse Aallyn

    Persistence – Commitment – Are you dreaming of rings? Tokens? Trophies? Collecting and collectibles? Antiques, graduations, pawn shops, art museums? You are longing for a “commitment ceremony” or some tangible symbol to articulate and consolidate an inchoate desire. Desire is nothing without will. You are a creature of Now, a chip on the whirlwind, but you desire power over yourself and the future.

    You Were Formed to be An Athlete – Naturally your skills aren’t very good at first. But one thing we do scientifically know is that there’s nothing magical about becoming a pro! Who said it takes 10,000 hours of practice to be good at something? Isn’t that, like 27 years? In other words, when you really want anything, you’re going to have to make a major life commitment to make this possibility a part of yourself.

    Challenge – Are you up for the sacrifice? Not many people are! You’re going to have to skip the easy, tempting treats – physical, spiritual, emotional – to satisfy the demands of your training. There’s really only one way to do this. You’re going to have to change into a person who LIKES and PREFERS this lifestyle. It’s easier if the lifestyle’s not TOO restrictive. By that logic, you can see that it makes sense to start off slow and build – just like you do in the gym. No sense overwhelming muscles with weight they can’t handle!

    Danger – The danger’s all around us and it’s called Addiction. Somebody gets obsessed with a pattern that started off healthy. Suddenly you’re in an obsessive spiral you can’t get out of. Admit it when you need help. Is this destructive pattern interfering with work? Relationships? Health? Are friends and family intervening, grumbling or starting to talk? When a commitment turns deadly – and we know even romantic relationships can do so – reach out to someone you trust for a balanced perspective. Likely there’s a plan already developed to get you back on track without losing the gains you’ve already made.

    Opportunity – Persistence in a healthy commitment is the best path to transformation there is. You truly can become a different person, the person you always wanted to be, over time and in tiny steps. When I wanted to give up sugar, I consumed a lot of fake sugar at first, then less and less over time, until now I can’t believe I ever liked or was satisfied by that stuff. My palate has changed, so has my health and so have I. That doesn’t mean I don’t eat wedding cake! I enjoy my newfound self, and you can have that self-rewarding pleasure too. Find a buddy on the journey – a tried and true pathway. Open your Dream Journal. Use mindfulness to examine cravings, release them and calmly set yourself free.

    Models & Mentors – “Thankfully, persistence is a great substitute for talent”
    – Steve Martin

    “Failure is a requisite for success. If you want to succeed, double your rate of failure” – Brian Tracey

    “Success is the willingness to work hard for twenty-two minutes on something others would give up on after thirty seconds” – Malcolm Gladwell

    “Success comes from curiosity, concentration, perseverance and self-criticism” – Albert Einstein

    Mantra – “I can”

    Meditation –

    #Haiku: The Danger of Cellular Negativity

    Death is a
    Choice.
    Creation’s fierce template
    Commits to life:
    Shared,
    Grown
    Spread.

  • #DreamTherapy – Dream Journaling with Alysse Aallyn

    Nurturing – Stewardship – Dreaming about pets? Comforting little wild animals? Gardening? These are Nurturing dreams. Like a child with a doll you long to care to another being and help it achieve its fullest potential. You long to protect it and succor it and at the same time, protect, succor and nourish the lost, frightened, wild, shy, needy parts of yourself.

    You Are A Steward – Dreaming about climate change? Overwhelmed by horrendous weather conditions such as tornados and hurricanes? Are you vegetarian or vegan? Enraged by animal abuse, factory farming and climate denial? Do you fear tsunamis and volcanoes? Do you see the whole of Mother Earth in your care?

    Challenge – You can stand up for your beliefs and test them. You will make a difference. Remember the legend of the one starfish the little girl saved? She couldn’t save all the starfish, but that one she saved was grateful. Remember karma? Karma is your universal bank account. When that little girl gets to heaven and it turns out the starfish are in charge, she is Good to Go.

    Danger – The only danger here is that you will forget to apply your own oxygen mask BEFORE you find oxygen for everyone else! Rookie mistake! Also a signal to predators everywhere that you will neglect your own needs to give to others. A moment’s thought tells you this is a zero sum game where everyone, ultimately loses. Replenishment is key. Give a man a fish and you have one less fish. Teach a man to fish and you’ve upgraded a human. Develop a method of fish replenishment and you’ve got a sustainable economy.

    Opportunity – As with the fishing analogy, this offers an endless chance for Learning, Invention and Creativity. You are lighting one candle after another in a very dark world, and benefiting everyone who come into contact with you. Open your Dream Journal. Dream.

    Models & Mentors – “The only limitation to our realization of tomorrow are the doubts of today” – Franklin Delano Roosevelt

    “A tiny change today brings a dramatically different tomorrow” – Richard Bach

    “Nothing is impossible. The word itself says, “I’m Possible.” – Audrey Hepburn

    “If a problem is fixable, there is no point in worrying. If a problem is not fixable, there is no point in worrying.” – The Dalai Lama

    Mantra – “I give”

    Meditation –

    #Haiku: Secret Garden

    Empiricism
    Riots;
    Growth
    Overmasters
    Lucky
    Curator

  • #DreamTherapy – Dream Journaling with Alysse Aallyn

    Chrysalis – Potential – Dreams tell us what COULD be. In the multiverse, physicists assure, everything is happening somewhere. Potential alerts us to the possibilities. The stick-colored, dead-seeming chrysalis contains nature’s most beautiful sprite, the butterfly. The invisibility of potential may discourage by daylight, but at night, the chrysalis opens and we are free.

    You Contain Multitudes – Whitman describes us, as well as himself. Be aware of the “restrictions” others eagerly place on you. Question them. Be the first in your family to — do something. Because you ARE the first in your family to be you. You are unique. In day dreams and night dreams, on conscious and unconscious levels, you explore all the odds and contingencies. Open your Dream Journal. Contact your Dream Buddies. Tell the ways.

    Challenge – Other people – often loved, needed and admired – keep trying to pin us down. They want to get to “know” us so they can “rely” on our sameness. They want us to stay where they left us, like a coat or umbrella. We will often place limits on ourselves, just to be accepted. But you are unrestrained in your dreaming imagination. Think of Max, who voyaged overnight to play with the Wild Things until he finally decided he wanted to return to his safe, warm, familiar bed. Every action you perform, every thought you think, suggests and then creates its opposite or “shadow” as Jung would say. Free yourself to consider all the alternatives. Then fly above them.

    Danger – Can we get lost? Will we become Peter Pan who was replaced and now can never come home? Fear is a valid reaction when danger is about. But danger is triggered by lack of escape. You are learning to deliberately keep all your psychic escape hatches open.

    Opportunity – Is there a fantasy that you cherish? Harry Potter, Narnia or Marvel? Expand it outwards. Insert yourself. So many discoveries have been made from and through fantasy fan fiction they are too numerous to mention here. But allowing yourself to dream is key. Imagine you are outfitting your inner butterfly. What colors? How about all colors, constantly changing?

    Models & Mentors – “The only person you are destined to be is the person you decide to become” – Ralph Waldo Emerson

    “Consult not your fears but your hopes and dreams. Think not about your frustrations but your potential. Concern yourself not with what you tried and failed but with what it is still possible for you to do.” – Pope John XXIII

    “Our essential nature is one of pure potentiality”
    – Deepak Chopra

    “Accept whatever comes and meet it with the best you have to give”

    – Eleanor Roosevelt

    Mantra – “I am many”

    Meditation –

    #Haiku: Chrysalis – Potential

    Unrecognizable:
    Disguised –
    Prototype
    Unbeing
    Becomes
    You

  • #DreamTherapy – Dream Journaling with Alysse Aallyn

    The Waterfall – Change – Do you dream of water? Ocean travel? When was the last time you had a falling dream? Or a drowning dream? “Dropping stomach” dreams that make us gasp signal a desire for (and fear of) change.

      You Resist Stagnancy – As your conscious mind seeks stasis, which it interprets as “security”, your subconscious rebels. It demands change! In the meanwhile, your subconscious IS changing, evolving fiercely along with the drama playing out in the entropical human race. Tune in!

      Behind the Wish Lies the Fear – Do you know how to swim? Take swimming classes – many adults do if only to brush up on their skills. Swimming is an essential pre-birth memory from safety inside the mother. Floating is an excellent way to release trapped memories and confront fears. Your mantra: “I am brave.”

      Challenge – Always shape your change towards growth by asking, is this making me a better person, or a more fearful person? More competent, less dependent, more unique, less compliant, more imaginative, less angry, more joyous, less envious. Evolve with me! Streamline! Let’s surf! Surfers celebrate every different wave.

      Danger – Fundamental attribution error says we blame ourselves for cultural systems and world conditions over which we have no control. Check your guilt/anxiety levels. If they are raging, is there anything you can do to ameliorate the causative circumstances? Open your Dream Journal. Being without guilt or anxiety is NOT the goal – that would describe a sociopath! But being crippled by guilt OR anxiety when there’s nothing you can do about it is disabling. And we’re in the empowerment department here.

      Opportunity – Change is scary but it is inevitable. If you’re not managing your own evolution, you’re headed downhill. What are the attributes you admire? Spoiler alert – not complaining and helplessness! Develop a picture of yourself as a wise being emitting light. Nurture calm, contentment, gratitude – in the midst of a thirst for new ideas and experiences to add to your expanding galaxy of knowledge.

      Models & Mentors – “Progress is impossible without change”
      – George Bernard Shaw

      “Change is the law of life. Those who look only to past and present are certain to miss the future.” – John F. Kennedy

      “Change does not roll in on the wheels of inevitability but comes after continuous struggle.” – Martin Luther King

      “It is not the strongest of our species that survive, nor the most intelligent, but the ones most responsive to change” – Charles Darwin

      Mantra – “I surf”

      Meditation –

      #Haiku: Unwanting

      Curbing desire
      Won’t work;
      Evolving desire will.
      Admit it:
      We’ve changed

    1. #DreamTherapy – Dream Journaling with Alysse Aallyn

      The Bridge – Discipline – Is “discipline” cruel? Is it one of your fears? Or is an orderly life what you long for but you’ve been told, because of your personality it’s completely out of reach? Do you have dreams of endless punishments at some infernal school?


      Discipline only means conforming to a plan – our map, remember? Get out your Dream Journal and study your plan, your list of wants and fears. Are you a harsh taskmaster to yourself? Why?


      Plans can be flexible – maps less so – but they are subject to change. By us. Because we’re in control.


      Nothing is achieved without discipline, which only means conforming your behavior to a previously conceived pattern but what does it mean to you? Your dreams will tell you.


      You Are Your Best Friend and Best Parent – No plan “works” in your life until you learn to practice delayed gratification and stick-to-itiveness. But first you need to feel your way through other patterns – bubbling up from the collective unconscious – some of which so hellish so you have to struggle with the source of those memories. You will need to disown them to give birth to your true self, whom you can lovingly mother. Harness your dream power to get yourself over the finish line.

        Challenge – do you treat others differently from the way you treat yourself? More or less generously? Why? We need to adapt our discipline constantly to enhance our thriving. But who’s doing the adapting – the Cruel Taskmaster, the Disgusted Lover or the Adoring, Generous Parent or the Permissive Saint? You contain all these (and they live in your dreams) , but who are you going to listen to? Who will you feed? Who has more power? Your choice controls your future. Consult appealing patterns that have worked for others and blend to taste. Develop a loving faith, and a sophisticated taste you can trust to guide you.

        Danger – Uh oh! You’ve fatally confused “discipline” with “punishment” and now are too debilitated to escape. Who said growth has to hurt?

        Opportunity – From our dreams we must summon a rescuer. Naturally that rescuer is OUR OWN TRUE SELF. In dreams sometimes it’s a hero, a fictional or historic figure or a spirit animal. Do you have a hero myth? Jack and the Beanstalk? Frozen? Joan of Arc? Read especially potent folk tales right before bed. Fall asleep imagining strengthened muscles – physical, spiritual, emotional – growing inside you. You are Jack AND the beanstalk! No giant can stand against you. Even the laziest, cruelest corner of the ego collapses to reveal itself as a Tiny Child yearning for effective mothering. We get to be the loving mother to ourselves.

        Models & Mentors – “Through self-discipline comes freedom” – Aristotle

        “Motivation gets you going, but discipline keeps you going” – John C. Maxwell

        “All success begins with self-discipline. It starts with you.” – Dwayne Johnson

        ‘Day by day – what you choose, what you think, what you do, is who you become” – Heraclitus

        Mantra – “I grow”

        Meditation –

        #Haiku: The Bridge

        Stuck:
        I’m here and you’re there.
        I’ll meet you
        Across an
        Ocean’s loneliness.

      1. #DreamTherapy – Dream Journaling with Alysse Aallyn

        Youth – Resilience – Dreaming a lot about your childhood? Your conscious mind is “mining” your subconscious for guides to the way you feel now. Did you pick the wrong path, and if so, why? Can you summon the effort to go back and fix it?

          “You’re as young as you feel” is a true saying! Ever met a “young” seeming old person? They are interested in everything. They are not frightened by new ideas. They don’t talk endlessly about their illnesses, complaints, how the world has gone to hell. They look forward to the future. The nature of “resilience” is that you “spring back”. You can actually use mistakes as energy, to improve your map-making. Surely you’re familiar with ”resistance training.” You get better muscles that way!

          Challenge – Open up your Dream Journal. How can we feel young when life keeps beating you down? The way to improve your resilience is to improve your philosophy. Do you believe people get old, they can no longer participate in the rat race, are shoveled under and it’s over? There’s a locker room inspiring pep talk. Don’t love and intelligence both REQUIRE wisdom? Adopt a philosophy that gives you hope. This is easier to do around young people. Grandparents cling to grandchildren. It’s good for both of them.

          Danger – Don’t get stuck in a “feedback loop.” Don’t hang around depressing, toxic people who mouth depressing, toxic notions. In our society old people are shunted off onto sidings, gathered together in communities that focus on “nursing”. Depressed yet? Re-orient your mind to focus on “health.” Resilience is a requirement for wounds of all types to heal.

          Opportunity – In a famous letter to Ann Landers, someone who wanted to go to medical school bewailed that they would forty years old when they got out! Forty! Landers asked, “How old will you be if you DON’T go?” Wise people all realize HOW YOUNG THE REST OF YOU really are, who are complaining about being “too old” to do what you want to do. You have plenty of time, because ALL time is NOW. Your new philosophy? “Spring back.”

          Models & Mentors – “Reasons for hope – our clever brains, the indomitable human spirit and above all, the commitment of young people when they’re empowered to take action” – Jane Goodall

          “We don’t even know how strong we are until we are forced to bring that hidden strength forward” – Isabel Allende

          “Success is not final, failure is not fatal, it is the courage to continue that counts’ – Winston Churchill

          “Hardships often prepare ordinary people for an extraordinary destiny”
          – C. S. Lewis

          Mantra – “My World Is New”

          Meditation –

          #Haiku: Resilience

          Fresh pink skin blooms
          Scarless
          Free;
          Regenerated fresh
          Every
          Morning

        1. #DreamTherapy – Dream Journaling with Alysse Aallyn

          Symbiosis – Interdependence – you can’t make it on your own. We are social beings, we need other people, all those characters peopling your dreams. We are DEPENDENT on them. This is such a tough thing to face that there are whole categories of people who go around insisting they “made it on their own.” They’re the only ones who believe it! They assemble a vast team, and not only that, they are dependent on teams set up by others to provide safety, water, heat, light. Visit a country where this isn’t a given and then you’ll realize what a massive enterprise is taking place around us.

            Flourish, Don’t Exploit – Symbiosis benefits everyone. If it leaves you “worse off” it’s not symbiosis, it’s exploitation. In our dreams we fear depredation, loss, failure, humiliation. We depend on the Collective Unconscious for the meaning in our lives. Our sleep world is the theatre where we rehearse our fears, making them LESS LIKELY to come true! We fear dependence because that means our “supply” can be cut off. But we also provide supply to others. What, and who? Any way we can improve the supply lines?

            Danger – Interdependence is a delicate balance, requiring sensitivity, reflection, and the capacity to change. Above all we want to avoid “Doomsday thinking” in which “since” the obvious entropy of the universe ruins all relationships eventually, so, by this reasoning, they must be ruined NOW. This “fear” completely overlooks the spiritual growth which time allows. Interdependence gives us insight and time and improved relationships – a recipe for emotional and intellectual thriving.

            Challenge – To become independent (i.e. free) we have to face the fact of our dependence on others and their dependence on us. Get out your Dream journal. Consult your Dream Buddies. How symbiotic are your relationships? Is there harm involved? Depredation? Abuse? Don’t make me repeat the 17 warning signs of an abusive relationship. It’s unequal, never a two-way street. Belittling? Baiting? Shaming? You should be able to recognize these techniques NOW so you can strategize a way out! If you DON’T recognize them there’s a very good chance your dreams DO. Pay attention to them. It’s possible to be abused by relationships with people we’ve never met – banks – corporations – landlords – employers – if this isn’t an equally mutual beneficial relationship we’re OUTTA HERE. (This is why authoritarians fear Cancel Culture. It reduces their depredation pool.) Yes you CAN find and foster relationships that are more beneficial.

            Opportunity – Nobody and nothing’s perfect and nobody wants that –ugh! Perfection is about stasis which is DEATH. WE are all about change, growth, evolution, becoming. Wisdom! Sharing joy! A back and forth process involving OTHER PEOPLE. Let’s work on our confidence. Let’s work on our spiritual muscle. Let’s work on our mapping abilities so we have a good idea where we’re headed. Expect surprises and greet them when they show up: “Hello old friend.”

            Models & Mentors – “Symbiotic relationship in nature teaches us cooperation and shows that we are all connected” – Sanchita Pandey

            “You are in a dynamic relationship with the universe because your existence is win-win” – Teal Swan

            ‘Symbiosis is a much higher reflection of intelligent life” – Frederick Lenz

            “Love is a positive, symbiotic, reciprocal flow between two or more entities”
            – Inga Muscio

            Mantra – “Let’s play”

            Meditation –

            #Haiku: Symbiosis = Interdependence

            I think with
            Your memory I
            Stretch with
            Your muscles
            Grasp with
            Dead hands