Category: healing

  • Sleeping Orchid – Creative Boot Camp for Sensitives & Empaths with Alysse Aallyn

    Chamomile – Healing Rituals

    If This Archetype Chooses You – Let’s access the gifts of the Creative. Let the healing begin. Are you a believer in magic? Do you dream of restoration, of nostalgia, of lost youth?

    Creatives Believe in Magic – Bravely, we put ourselves in the way of harm, and harm is done to us. But we believe in the magic of restoration through transformation. These scars, these wounds, these experiences make us smarter, harder, brighter and more beautiful.

    Understand the Meaning of Your Scars – These are life’s tattoos, which have ennobled you. It is your honor to embody the story of the universe with your blood and your bone. But it is the Creative’s Brain that brings us closest to God. The mystery of suffering is that it educates us into the greatest mystery of all – that God is willing to suffer with us because Love means holding each other through pain and infusing our strength into another’s sadness.

    Bow To Each Other – Show Respect – We are each other’s masters, we are each other’s pupils, we are each other’s lovers, siblings and rescuers. Drinking ginger tea from translucent porcelain cups, we lift our cups to each other. We bathe together in steaming pools. I release you as you release me. When darkness falls, we touch one another’s hands before departing. If we can bear it, we touch bodies.

    Creatives Recognize That We Cannot Diagnose Ourselves – We offer ourselves for the universe’s good and so it takes a world to cure us. Healing and diagnosis alike will come from the welcome lips of another. It has been scientifically proven that even plants respond to kind words. We yearn for the laying on of hands, for the gentle rituals that pass us from one stage of life to another.

    Creative Challenge – Paradoxically, no “medicine” can succeed unless we “accept” our healing spiritually. We must feel “worthy” of restoration. What are we fighting for? Think deeply. We are not self-punishing but stating as clearly as we can that life is valuable in all its forms. If you are only as “young” as you feel, are we only as “healthy” as we allow ourselves to be? Forgive yourself. Accept change. Contrary to our fears, it is change that keeps us young.

    Creative Danger – Healing cannot occur in an atmosphere of self-hatred and self-blame, but many of us are STILL “blaming” ourselves for twists of fate, for unlucky genetic, social and medical outcomes. “Fundamental attribution error” consists of blaming individuals for group effects. We are all caught up in the machinery of temporality. Never forget that we are souls who happen to have bodies, not bodies who happen to have souls.

    Creative Opportunity – “Restoration” is such a glorious promise that early Christians found themselves ensnared in decades of argument about PHYSICAL resurrection. How would it work in cases of burning and dismemberment, exactly? It is easy to laugh at these painfully ridiculous theological conflicts. One is reminded of St. Joan of Arc’s response to interrogators at her trial who asked if angels appeared to her naked – “Do you think God cannot afford to clothe his angels?” Accept the power accorded to you by the universe. Accept the strength of your own mind, the control given by your chosen attitude. Healing is not just possible, it is a life-force in which we can all participate. Jesus came to us as a healer.

    Models & Mentors – “Healing yourself is connected with healing others”
    Yoko Ono

    “What happens when people open their hearts? They get better.”
    Haruki Murakami

    Your body cannot heal without play. Your mind cannot heal without laughter. Your soul cannot heal without joy.” ~ Catherine Rippinger Fenwick

    “We are healed of suffering only if we experience it to the full – Marcel Proust

    “Maybe the dragons in our lives are princesses”
    Rainer Maria Rilke

    #Haiku: I Don’t Know

    Admit ignorance
    No shame –
    It’s healthy –
    Empty glass
    Asks for water

  • Sleeping Orchid – Boot Camp for Sensitive Creatives with Alysse Aallyn

    The Eagle – Energy

      What It Means If This Archetype Chooses You – Do your dreams pulse with power and excitement? You are gathering force for a great work. You are readying yourself for some great task.

      You Are The Power – You struggle to take command of your force. You feel the power and strength of undefined wishes and an inchoate longing to create your place in the world. No guide exists to this wilderness, you will have to map this forest yourself. Be brave.

      All Connection Is an Energy Transfer –When you make any contact – even exchange a glance – with another living being, a current of energy passes between you, even if the “other” has been ruled “non-sentient” by our limited – and limiting – standards. In the depth of your being, you feel the electric thrill. This is the basis for “crowd bathing”, “flash mobs”; “forest bathing”; “garden bathing.” Even museum and gallery visits and cinema attendance can inspire and renew your power.

      Energy Drainage – This sets up the possibility that energy – your life force – can be sucked right out of you. Recognize when this is happening – you are being fed upon. Get away from the predator as fast as you can go.

      Creative Challenge – There are plenty of traps ahead. Do not become discouraged. Accept that the flow of energy pulses with your every heartbeat, with your sleep/rest cycle, with the obligations you willingly seek to stir, supplement and smooth your path.

      Creative Danger – Some of these obligations become too heavy, others seek to deter you from your set course. Still others offer false maps that seem to promise the ease of “I don’t have to do this alone.” We are all alone inside our heads and you – and only you – must be satisfied with the map you create. If you aren’t there’s no fellowship or wealth that can compensate you for that loss.

      Creative Opportunity – We revel in and with our fellow travelers. There could be a Soulmate among them – for a time or for a life. Accept the wisdom of others, the wisdom of the path, feel free to consult other maps in designing your own. Be prepared to alter your map – joyously – with each new and fresh discovery. There will be many. Salut!

      How Did People You Admire Manifest the Life Force? Jesus spent an epic 40 day & nights in the desert. Margaret Mead lived in Samoa studying the Samoans. Carl Sagan describes his “defining moment” as visiting the World’s Fair at four years old. It exploded and expanded his mind. Who are your models? Research them and study their transitions and experiments.

      Magic & Mystery: A you accept yourself and accept your changes, you are confronting the dynamic of change, which is the manifestation of energy in existence. We are all alive and moving. This is a dance and you are the choreographer and star. Erik Erikson said “A good life is like a weaving. Energy is created in the tension. The pull and tug, the struggle, is everything.”

      Commit to tiring yourself out during the day with thought, exercise and interrelations so that you can enjoy healthy sleep at night.

      Models & Mentors – ‘Every thought has an energy. Thoughts send out a magnetic frequency” – Rhonda Byrne

      “Energy is the power that drives every human being. It is not lost by exertion but maintained by it – for it is a faculty of the psyche” – Germaine Greer

      “If you want to find the secrets of the universe, think in terms of energy, frequency and vibration” – Nikola Tesla


      “The more positive energy you throw into the universe, the more positive energy you get back”

      • – Nitin Namdeo

      Haiku: Catalytic Action

      Partake:
      Energy blooms;
      Whirlpools
      Dance;
      I am
      Limitless
      So are you

    1. Butterfly Language for Caterpillars – Soulmate Seeking with Alysse Aallyn

      The Daisy = LOVE “Is love real?” “Love Waves”

                  Love is the secret. Love is the answer. Love is what we say we feel when we look into the Soulmate’s eyes According to our long, rich tradition of romantic literature, it’s a connection/identification with someone else so powerful (and so rewarding) you would walk through fire for that person. 

                  Biblically defined as:

                  “Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres” 

                  Love is the opposite of the winner/loser “fuck you” ethos. 

                  Love is patient. We can’t expect the Soulmate to be on the same page with us immediately, or all the time. We must work out our differences, analyze our difficulties and strategize        solutions. Love takes time.

                  Love is kind. We handle each other gently, with care. Thoughtfully, with reverence. Slowly. Savoring.

                  Love does not envy. We are not competitive with each other. When we wrestle, it is in play, for joy, not because we want to         trounce the Soulmate or knock the feet out from under the Beloved.

                  Love does not boast. We are not seeking to impress each other. Love is not a hierarchy where we can lift our status above the Loved One.

                  Love is not proud. We can admit fault. We can say we are sorry. We can weep with the Beloved and we can begin again.

                  Love does not dishonor others. There is no “score”, no winner  and no loser. We don’t take tattletales of the Beloved to friends, family, social media or the public space. 

                  Love is not self-seeking. It is not transactional: “what can I get out of this” “you are not giving enough” “you are not making me look good.”

                  Love is not easily angered. We resist anger, touchiness, rage over our wounded narcissistic self-importance. If we are angry we cannot join, touch each other, embrace whole-heartedly or solve problems. When you get angry over a problem, now you have two problems. 

                  Love keeps no record of wrongs. When we say, “I forgive you”, we mean it.

                  Love does not delight in evil. We do not seek the diminishment or disrespect of the other. Popular “bondage” and “sadism” games that memorialize the helplessness and subjection of the Other are dangerous, volatile and can be triggers of past dangers and will map out a bleak and lonely future.

                  Love rejoices in the truth. The truth evolves because our brains evolve. Truth is a process as our lives are a process. We are all heading for an end goal – both together and separately – if we        can   figure out what it is. Truth is our ally in this dilemma, because it tells us the real results of all our strategies which allows us to calibrate our efforts and improve our outcomes.         We must speak truth to each other and we must grow in stature enough to dare to speak truth to Power.

                  Love protects. We shelter. We nourish. We steward. We cherish. We assess. We unite.

                  Love always trusts. We believe. We have the best assurance that God is good and that truth, justice and love will win in the end.

                  Love always hopes. Things will get better tomorrow. We will         work towards constant improvement.

                  Love perseveres. We will never quit. We are in this for the long haul.

      Meditation:  I am part of all I have met  – Tennyson

      #Haiku: Love Waves

      Sound travels forever

      Like love;

      Stars’ boundless dance

      Launched

      By mortal hearts

    2. Butterfly Language for Caterpillars – Soulmate Seeking with Alysse Aallyn

      Foxglove = MEDICINE “Alyssum”

      “Intervention”

      We find ourselves now in an endless pandemic, a New Normal caused by our aggressive human interference with our planet’s wildlife. By a miracle the same pharmaceutical companies that have been competitively bleeding all of us dry have come up with a vaccine that seems effective at keeping most of us out of the hospital. Wouldn’t want to kill the golden geese!

      But it doesn’t work if you don’t take it and, wonder of wonders, a substantial number of Americans have become suspicious of the medical establishment! Since insurance companies have been advertising for years that healthcare is “our choice” based on “what plan we can afford” I for one am not surprised.

      This is the only possible end result of a gated health care system that actively despises “Public” health as “radical socialism”!

      So where is our Soul & our Soulmate in all this, our little, fragile, mortal, human body that drew the “medical intervention” card only this morning? “Medical intervention” is represented in the Tantric Garden by the humble foxglove.

      Foxgloves contain digitalis, the building block of cardiology care. Where do we stand on intervention? We may create a “perfect world” with our Soulmate but does that mean we can let no one in? A moment’s thought convinces that we must keep the freshening breezes of this world blowing as long as we are in this world! “Help” will always be needed and hopefully, offered.

      Can we learn to trust the Helpful Intervener? We don’t want to create a love nest so fragile it is threatened by any outsider. Instead, we want to make certain we avail ourselves of every good advancement and improvement opportunity in our oh so imperfect world.

      ALYSSUM

      What wound is this?
      Flowering? Flowering?
      I wake at two am
      Immobilized –
      A curvilinear clamp
      Half hoop clenching
      My right side.
      .

      It could be the strain of
      Fishing for a future
      Hooking sky through a
      Porthole window or
      I could be over-organized. The
      Doctors dismissed me in
      My mother’s name.
      “You dare to be angry?
      You dare to grow old?
      You are a false alarm.”

      I say a prayer to the great night heron, that
      Pregnant thief of dreams –
      Solitary hunter calling to collect me.
      Dream he rises
      To unleash the silken sinews
      Of submission from my torn and
      Tethered wing –
      Feathered like a revelation
      Stippled like the phases of the moon
      Birthing spirit, coming
      Coming, coming
      In his cloud of fire.

    3. Butterfly Language for Caterpillars – Seeking a Soulmate with Alysse Aallyn

      Chrysalis = Potential

      “Hot Prowl”

      The Chrysalis looks dead; that is its disguise. A simple, broken leaf, soon to be swept away by wind or rain. But in fact, it’s a puzzle box that holds the whole universe inside itself; an unbroken chain of DNA, an augury of “becoming” dating from the dawn of Life itself. So is each of us a Chrysalis…of what? For what?

      We are powerhouses seeking ignition. We can feel the slow-gathering strength within, but we are still mysteries to ourselves. We need the Other to become a Full Being. Plato posited that man/woman are separated angels endlessly seeking their other half. Your duty is to protect the chrysalis so that it can unfold in its own good time. Be patient, your day of flight and connection comes ever closer.

      HOT PROWL

      Don’t wake up.
      Surveilled by night
      Your chiseled torso
      Slackened with exhaustion.
      Touching things that once
      You touched,
      Listening to your apnea;
      I turn away before you turn.
      Making peace with all my choices.
      It’s been worth everything –
      Winning in divorce a
      Hard-won superpower:
      Invisibility

    4. Butterfly Language for Caterpillars – Seeking a Soulmate with Alysse Aallyn

      Cooperation = DIVISION OF LABOR : “INSOMNIA”

      “We can help each other”

      Life is always a collaborative venture. Cooperation makes the world go round; you are not going to find a SoulMate without carefully orchestrating your dance steps together. Working together on constructive plans that will pass from one generation to another has created multiple marvels of engineering and design.

      But among human beings, at least, the chain breaks down when some of our less attractive tendencies toward competition, paranoia and greed rear their ugly heads. And there is little that can be accomplished on the human plane at least without seemingly endless slatherings of goodwill. In the animal world, cooperation goes much more smoothly, with social insects routinely building cities that rival the Eight Wonders of the World.

      Human marriage is a two-way support system; that is the reason for its longevity. Divorce and dissolution come when someone feels they’re getting too little. Cooperation always offers chance for communion, that vital sense we have of being a necessary part of something bigger, more long-lasting and more important.

      Division of Labor – We’ll never be able to do everything to achieve our goals. We are going to need help. How do we get other people on board? How delegate effort? We need to brace ourselves for “pushback” as in, “Why should I help you?”

      We may have to help other people with THEIR goals! When we made our list of resources, other people figured prominently. Now we decide how to “sell” our ideas as well as ourselves! Why are we worthy of help and assistance in a world that is begging for it? As so often happens, the best advice is to “start small”. Offer a friendship transaction: “I’ll pick up this item for you if you pick up that item for me.”

      “Cooperation” is reciprocity. We are looking for an equal relationship that respects our essential differences. We not only need support on our life path, we are eager to support the Beloved.


      Cooperation” protects us from one-way relationships. Above all, we don’t want to get sucked into another’s cycle of destruction. This pathology currently goes by the name “narcissism”.

      “Narcissists create a shared fantasy of victimhood.” Narcissists LIVE in fantasy. They create not only a fantasy version of themselves but also a fantasy version of YOU!! This is critical for comprehending the anguish caused by abuse. They are excellent manipulators; they create an idealized version of the victim, and narcissists somehow convince the victim that they should play along to receive the benefits that they seek.

      The narcissist secures the “power” of shattering this fantasy whenever they choose (known as the devaluation and discarding phase.) They threaten to deprive you of your perfect self-image! That is why we experience so much pain. We are not grieving the loss of narcissists. We are not grieving the time we spent with narcissists. We are grieving our idealized lives and selves!! Narcissists are filled with a senseless, secret hate (usually based on envy) that requires them to degrade and disappoint you – probably some “magical” re-enactment of a catastrophic disappointing degradation THEY experienced once upon a time. You can’t be their therapist.

      As soon as it becomes apparent that cooperation is not only impossible but that your suffering is required, you need to GET OUT NOW. Willingness to give is the necessary foundation of SoulMating.

      INSOMNIA

      I can’t sleep

      Because you’re gone

      My muscles wake

      My mind goes spinning on

      And where your fingers

      Built and praised my face

      Night air is cold and careless

      In its place

      And where we turned and woke

      In complex rhyme

      I’m left to face the music

      frayed by time; a waltz

      Which once we won

      Is now a limping battle danced by one;

      None to explore

      Appreciate my line

      Thought now at last it’s

      Incontestably mine

    5. the Language of Butterflies – walking the path of attachment with Alysse Aallyn

      Dreams = IMAGINATION “Freud’s Wolfman”

      “Spiritual Connectivity”


      Your Soulmate is reaching out to you in dreams. In dreams we discover not just the Other but ourselves. Dreams give the lie to the idea that we are simple biological creatures tethered to rituals of attachment, food foraging, illness and death. In dreams we see visions, and we spend we rest of our lives puzzling out their meaning.

      There has not yet been a human culture unaware of the numinous nature of existence. Given the choice between symbol-saturated subjects and simple objects, we go for the symbol every time. We live entirely within our own heads, playing out a story line known to us alone.


      Dreams awaken us to different reveries. It is quite possible, as the philosophers suggest, that we are truly asleep in our everyday interactions and only fully conscious in our Dreams.
      Dreams consolidate the day’s learning with the night’s yearning, forging connections with our deepest selves and with others’ deepest selves, alive and dead. Dreams are the story our primitive self tells our grown-up, social selves.

      Dreams don’t necessarily even belong to us but can be “transferred” from those around us, including the dead, and even celebrities (such as literary figures and fictional characters) with whom we have forged an emotional bond. Therefore, the content of the dream, while important, is not as important as the soul from which it originates.


      Today we will work on “self-hypnosis;” a process of “asking a question”, relaxing into a “waking trance” and thinking about what bubbles up. Remember not all questions have answers, and few have immediate answers; but it is important to put the question “out there”.


      If fear is our primary reaction when we want to study our deepest links with others, that has to be dealt with so that we can move forward in our Soulmate Quest. What do we fear, exactly? We are not at the “mercy” of the universe, we are its “co-creators” and we must bravely claim our birthright.


      Dreams are to be welcomed; they are not simply warnings and stories but also teases, in a language we need to learn. Dreams celebrate our spiritual connectivity not just with all the creatures who have ever shared the gift of life but with ideas, group powers and abilities.

      They say when we go to sleep in one world, we awake in another. Perhaps it is our Soulmate’s world. Dreams show us our possibilities as well as our fears. I once had a dream in which I looked at myself in my coffin, but it was a powerful “my soul jumps!” experience and not a fearful one. When my son was a tiny boy he described dreamed of driving a truck “and my feet reached the pedals!”

      Sometimes we are such beginners we don’t even know what to dream about. Dreams have long been recognized as warnings. Our unconscious sees dangers our conscious self refuses to recognize. So it creates a worthwhile map – not to the way forward, but a method of understanding where you have been. If you are having nightmares about a love choice, this is something to pay attention to. Gavin de Becker tells us (Gift of Fear) to honor our fear, but not to be controlled by it. Move forward with caution.

      DREAM OF FREUD’S WOLFMAN

      The window opens of its own accord.
      He’s catapulted forward; waked.
      Outside, the walnut tree is hung with wolves
      Each to its branch; they watch him


      Blankly. Stillness has its
      Consequence. They are fat
      As lambs ready for castration; round
      As dogs; white as mother’s underdrawers.


      Such tails! Thick tails
      Perked and listening!
      Blue snow rumples up the bedclothes; stiffens
      Into plaster. This sky leads nowhere.


      The child’s eyes are frozen like the window
      They do not close; this tree
      Is butchered at the crown; it will
      Not grow.


      The wind that frosts the room is welcome
      Stirring like a scream and like a scream
      It alters what it sees.
      The wolves levitate.


      What they know the child
      Must discover.

    6. The Language of Butterflies – walking the path of Attachment with Alysse Aallyn

      Duality = AMBIVALENCE “The Sideways Smile”

      “Love/Hate”

      Dormancy casts us into contemplation, and contemplation heightens our uncertainty. Duality reminds us that meditating on the opposites in our natures must become part of our standard meditation practice. When we desire to bring a soulmate into existence we ask ourselves: what does it mean to be “opposite”?

      Consider all sides of this equation; consider, also, that we ourselves create and trigger our own “opposites” so we must observe the infinite potential conceived by the opposite of intention, designed by the opposite of desire, spawning the opposite of Being itself.

      It is human to want two conflicting and contradictory things at once. When we “choose” any one thing, we give its shadow power. We still “want” the neglected thing: perhaps more than ever now that we can no longer “have” it. This can’t “hurt” us so long as we’re aware of it.

      We must expect the path not taken to rear up in our dreams and stake its claim to our life. When we see it, we dismiss it again: “Begone, I don’t want you. I have not chosen you.” Every time we make this statement we diminish its force a tiny bit. The worst thing we can do is become its advocate: “Maybe that’s not so bad. Why can’t I have both?” If we make that mistake we are setting up a vicious circle of longing for the way not chosen; we may decide we are more about the bad choices than the good ones: “I just can’t help myself.” Speak the words “Begone. You have no power over me. I have not chosen you.”

      Every time we say them they become a little bit more true. We have the right to become good souls by design, not monsters controlled by appetite alone.

      Approach/Avoidance. Fear/Attraction. Love/Hate. We feel all these emotions at the same time, swirling together to form a new emotion, ambivalence, which some of us try to negotiate using experimentation, “safe words”, role play. It’s possible; but rigidity is always to be distrusted. If we are manipulating a series of masks to hide behind our purpose is automatically defeated.

      What is that purpose? Self-knowledge. Self-revelation. Authenticity, followed by the bliss of Other-knowledge; other-revelation. And the fact that, together, soulmates become a multiplied force of never-yet-seen-in-the-history-of-the-world power and personhood. To achieve this goal, we learn to accept and know, tolerate, negotiate, master and revel in the wilderness within each of us and the wilderness we create together.

      This course can be fearful, even shaming. We will decide several times a day: “This is too much for me”, “I can’t do this,” “I’m not good at this.” How dare I release you when I can’t release me? How can I create you when I can’t create me?” We dare. We can. With the ultimate result that we release and create, Us.

      The Sideways Smile

      I heard you singing and remembered
      All the things that you’d forgotten
      Seeing you clearly – like
      A fish in a hailstone.


      Seeing your hands
      Long for a man I always thought
      Your upper lip too short
      Like a lion’s – in fact
      You have an animal presence –


      Placing no trust in words
      Placing no trust in love
      Pretending you’d never met me
      Creating islands undiscovered
      Worlds unreachable;


      You were the joke
      I didn’t get; I recall your sideways smile
      Blowing smoke between us
      Refusing to forgive the essential fragility that
      Marks us humans;


      Fated as you were
      Always surrendering
      To the scornful cries of your
      Invisible hecklers.

    7. The Language of Butterflies – walking the path of attachment with Alysse Aallyn

      Winter = DORMANCY

      “What’s happening when nothing’s happening?”

      Winter’s force is shrouded, subtle. This unfolding happens on the universe’s timeline, not ours. There’s a lot of downtime – “thinking time.” Plenty of space for self doubt to creep in.

      All the important changes are happening just beyond our vision. The snowshoe rabbit changes fur to pure white for self-protection; he doesn’t have to think about it; it just happens. Other creatures work a little harder.

      Our art teacher always told us to value the white spaces, because they throw color and design into sharper relief, and so it is with winter. Finally, we see all things in clear perspective. Suddenly the humble woodpecker becomes a most exotic bird.

      Adventuresome humans love winter where gravity meets speed; we are always flying down one hill or another. And when we get to the bottom, we do it again! The thing I like best about winter is that it holds the promise of spring, tight in its protectively furled bud.

      Under the quiet surface much is happening, but little may be visible. (Psychologists call this “latency”.) Winter bears a real similarity to the state we call “sleep.” We yearn for sleep, even find it exciting, and researchers are constantly uncovering more benefits that it provides. It seems to “clean” our brains the way winter “cleans” the world!

      Winter has its own exotic creatures, the polar bear, the snow leopard, the precious ermine. These creatures seem magical to us as they make a living on the harshest landscapes.

      “Dormancy” is a necessary phase for anything living thing. All our energy is being conserved for maximum growth. We must ask ourselves: what is this thing that is gathering power? Is it a long desired consummation or some threateningly impossible monster?

      We remind ourselves that explorers saw the same “ice” bear we consider so adorable as a “monster.” Melville’s deadly whale was “white”. Perhaps beauty and monstrosity are flip sides of the same coin. What is happening to us? What do we want to happen? The real question is, Is our unconscious “for” us or against us?

      Jung said when we analyze our subconscious, it analyzes us: a marvelous phrase suggesting growth is a back-and-forth tennis match between our known and unknown selves. “Winter” gives us a chance to greet the unknown self and cuddle up with her. Much to think about!

      After our burst of energy planting seeds in searching for a soulmate, it may seem the world’s inert. But seeds are “taking hold.” The Bible reminds us that some will grow and some will not. We ourselves don’t know what we have planted and what it will look like when it finally enters sunlight.

      Once again, it’s all about us; how patient can we be? How do we handle uncertainty in this uncertain world? Can we relax against changes of pace, lessening of control, confusion? As we search for our “forever” person we need to BECOME a “forever person.”

      This is very unfamiliar, so of course we move slowly. No kneejerk reactions of anger or despair. There’s a joke about a motorist stranded without gas, carrying his can to a nearby farm but worried the farmer won’t cooperate. The motorist gets so angry at this imagined exchange that when he sees the farmer, he throws the gas can at him, screaming, “Keep your old gas!”

      He couldn’t “tolerate” the walk to the farmhouse without doubt, fear and shame sabotaging his thoughts. Let’s not handle our period of dormancy in that way. Let’s use it to toughen up. Sharpen up. Sweeten up, like maple syrup in the tree.

      TOO LATE IN THE YEAR

      The mind is double-edged as well as double-eyed
      She thinks; stands
      outside to watch him
      Sightlessly within;
      Safe within his private storm he
      Covers sheets with runes,  
      Purloined plans from somewhere else;
      Plagiarized love-letters –
      Sexual ivy casting
      Hawks-wing shadows
      on his bloodhound cheeks;
      That smile is too cautious;
      Too familiar;
      In season and out;
      Nurtured like his scars
      Deepening like his drama.
      Save him, save him voices cry but
      I know better; it’s too late
      Too late in the year.

    8. The Language of Butterflies- walking the Path of Attachment with Alysse Aallyn

      Sex = SOULMATES – ‘”Nocturne”

      “are Soulmates born or made?”


      In the Tantric Garden, Sex is sacred. In blindness we reach out to touch, to connect. This garden of existence demands that we inhale life through our every pore, and the central need of life is that we must share the flame that warms us or risk its ultimate extinction. There could be no garden without the mystery and joy of pollination and propagation; doubling and tripling not just our chances of survival but intensifying our savor and our senses.

      The garden becomes a hugely hungry mouth, a pulsating groin, and we moan with it. The shock of the sublime. To live the dream is to become the dream. We are constituted for pleasure; igniting and increasing pleasure in a firework display that mimic the creation of the universe itself. Relationships solidify; two strengthen into one; frail flesh solidifies and love itself becomes unbreakable.

      Spring is mating. We are searching for our lost half, our better AND our worse self. As we transform from a helpless to an intentional person, we seek the self we have been all along, as they seek themselves in us.

      NOCTURNE

      You reveal

      Yourself to me

      To my inner palate

      An artist’s palette

      Moth-winged hands

      Fluttering

      Out the phases of your moon-flat belly your

      Crescent thighs surging

      Urging

      Union undivided

      Prickly venus flytrap hairs that guard

      Your anis scented anus open up

      Your fleshy mandibles

      For a toothless suck

      In trembling sheaves

      Grouting for your smoky-salted dinner

      Double-snouted cock stiffens in

      My mango halves

      O I will baste you when its time

      With angel-spit, with love-spawn

      Dip you in my styx of roe

      Musky caviar

      You sensate wanderer you

      Suck

      Ubus

      I know you
      Open me.