Alysse Aallyn

Category: #Nightmare

  • The Language of Butterflies – walking the Path of Attachment with Alysse Aallyn

    The shadow=DISSONANCE “Considering the Chill Factor

    “Confronting your shadow self”

    We were very young when first we became aware of The Shadow. No happy moment, no celebration of joy is unaffected by its subtle miasma. But what is it exactly?

    Much of childhood – history itself, in fact – is absorbed by the effort to put a name to this lurking angst.

    Demonic forces, bad dreams, animals, reptiles, insects, The Invisible – entire populations of seemingly foreign persons have been stigmatized by this label. Which is not to say that somebody, somewhere, didn’t experience trouble from the reality of these forces.

    Philosophers tell us that all we’re feeling is an inherent fear of death, but we can see that fear itself is hardwired into species who are otherwise unselfconscious of the limitations of existence. Perhaps all we have to fear is Fear itself, as the President put it. But who would willingly wish to walk fearless through this dangerous world? Isn’t it better to be prepared and take care?

    A great man once advised us to be as wily as serpents and as gentle as doves. Good advice for gardeners! The knowledge that joy is fragile heightens its ecstatic power. Without this triple vision of past, possibility and future courage itself would be impossible.

    Suspicion – There is something behind us. We can feel its unsettling presence. It seems to follow us everywhere, teasing a fine line between doubt and paranoia. In medieval times this “shadow” was represented by The Grim Reaper, complete with cape and scythe, reminding us the party would soon be over. We are warned to “Take care” by friends and loved ones; but against what exactly?

    Doctors tell us to be vigilant about our health while at the same time they mock hypochondriacs. There are people who never “take care” and who insist that suspicion itself creates the monster, but on the whole, these people are not enviable. They appear to have rejected a “sixth sense” we’re all born with. Who would willfully blind themselves?

    For those of us committed to exploring all our senses suspicion shadows joy as doubt shadows faith. Visually, shadows show us where things are. Like taste testers cultivating knowledge of the edge between sweet and sour we “feel” for the “turn” of the tide. The better to avoid it? Possibly to control it? At least to get an image – however brief – of the Thing that has been following, following?

    Ascetics need particularly to arm themselves with some sense of when “just enough” turns into “too much.” Many authorities try to convince us that being a little “hungry” is a good thing. Certainly being “sated” triggers a drowsy, relaxed, state in which our “guard” is down. We do lose consciousness of that quiet little “frenemy” following. Following. The Shadow symbolizes a problematic development just coming into perceptive range.

    Jung says we all seek our opposite, our “shadow self.” Feminists want house-husbands, wall street traders want supermodels. We yearn to recover our disavowed selves, blindly, subconsciously. Online profiles request specific “looks”, weights, backgrounds, experiences as if “soulmate” was a job. Yet we remain dissatisfied; feel  shortchanged. Perhaps the shadow is fear of change. The thoughtful among us blame ourselves: “I’m not right”; the shallow blame the world:  “I can never get what I want.”

    The truth is we are judging plants by seeds when what we want are gardeners. We want to become gardeners, we wish to BE the garden. But how on earth can we do THAT?

    Absence of understanding OR language renders our circumstances hopeless. We need another singer who will help construct a duet that doesn’t yet exist, a fellow artist of the sexual, the subconscious, the unconscious, who paints us as we photograph them. We need to be prepared to change places in a moment, to sing and redesign the other’s part. We must be willing dreamers with a huge repository of fantasy, fearless poets accessing a universal vocabulary. We will fall in love, then out of it, fall deeper, soar. It will feel uncomfortable and unfamiliar at every point as we blend swiftly changing roles of tutor and pupil.  Prepare yourself to plunge into another and become them, as they remodel you.

    CONSIDERING THE CHILL FACTOR
     
    Considering the chill factor
    As I always try to do –
    That day was hot
    Too hot for love or war.

    We sit in restaurants.  I pick
    The blue-veined shrimp
    He picks the black-veined news.

    Outside drunkards
    Carom off the plexiglass like entertaining fish.
    “They envy us” I say
    and Andrew says
    “How nice.”

    I see a couple coming in; she holds him up
    As I so often upheld you.
    I know that touch – like
    surgeons who
     manipulate the dying.

    She wears my dress
    the one I wore the day you
    Shamed me
    Stuck me sizzling to the sidewalk –
    Shamed us both
    with red red stains.

    “Andrew  I don’t think
    I have quite forgiven you.”
    Andrew says “How nice” and
    Lays his coffee spoon upon the cloth –
    I hate the brown stain –
    it spreads like murder
    Like the bad smell of death
    Breeding fumes as we do
    Corpses in the sun.

    I rise to speak
    Shrimp spewing from my mouth like
    Parasites.
    “We have always been
    So happy, you and I-“

  • #DreamTherapy – Dream Journaling with Alysse Aallyn

    Crystal Ball – Prophecy – The Number One question people have about dreams is, Are they prophetic? And the answer is of course YES. We already KNOW the “truth’. We fear the truth. We don’t want to face the truth. We fear the continuing “losses” of age because the accretions are so hard to see. Our dreams KNOW what is going on. But they are also Art, and art – especially good art – is as mysterious, meaningful and forceful as any living thing. It changes as you change, and it changes depending on how you look at it.

    Accept the Revelation – Open Dream Journal. It is time to list the revelations. Your dreams tell you when you are afraid. Your dreams tell you when something is missing. Your dreams uncover all the secrets you have been keeping from yourself. The first obligation is to accept is the possibility that the truth is not so terrible. It is the endless hiding, the mounting fear, that can be really destructive.

    Challenge – The truth is that we are human, that we are imperfect, and that we need each other. The truth is that humans need governance and law to regulate our natural blindness and selfishness (which some would call original sin) into peaceful accord. The truth is also that humans who lust only for power will eternally angle to get themselves into positions of control, exclusion and punishment. These types must be weeded out and it is courageous, difficult, and really unwelcome work, because we creative, loving, generous types have our own lives to live.

    Danger – Our dreams notify us when one of these lethal persons is in our midst. Our dreams offer a variety of plans for confrontation and escape, and a recipe for courage. At the present time, the Lethal Persons are banding together and hoarding weapons to give themselves even more guarantees for power and opportunities to enjoy our despair.

    Opportunity – Jesus said evil will not win. The challenge is to explore what ELSE he said, indeed, what is the message of all the great teachers? It is not to hate one another and go to war with one another and people who tell you that it is are agents of evil. The first challenge is to create peace in our own hearts, peace in our own lives, peace in our own homes, and then start developing compassion for those who are not so lucky. When their brutal tactics are exposed for the empty promises that they are as family destroyers, peace destroyers and community destroyers, they will acknowledge that their efforts to share their despair come from a desire to surmount despair, and that it has never worked and is not working. Then we will welcome them back into the community of Sharing.

    Models & Mentors – “We write the future moment to moment”

    – Pema Chodron

    “The best prophets lead you up to the curtain and leave you to peer through for yourself” – Frank Herbert

    “The greatest thing a human soul can accomplish in this world is to see that poetry, prophecy & religion all are one”
    – John Ruskin

    “The best way to predict the future is to create it”
    – Abraham Lincoln

    “Yesterday has gone, tomorrow has not come, let us begin” – Mother Teresa

    Mantra – “I see”

    Meditation –

    #Haiku: The Future

    Wisdom & will
    Extinguish death;
    Ides of Youth
    Depower Fear
    Share
    Growth

  • #DreamTherapy – Dream Journaling with Alysse Aallyn

    Judgement – Do you dream of gossips, shunners, condemnation? Franz Kafka’s brilliant novels are about the feeling of being sentenced for unexplained crimes we didn’t intentionally commit with no way to defend ourselves.

    Do you dream of a great eye? Walls of eyes? We know other people are looking. We know we are being assessed, ranked, possibly dismissed. We defensively assess, dismiss and gossip about each other. It’s so hard to know what’s really going on when we are right in the middle of it. Do you dream of trials? Punishment? Hangovers?

    Cultivate Discernment – You notably have the right to judge for yourself, but you have the obligation. We are familiar with the experience of disliking some experience until a friend teaches us “how” to like it. We treasure the interesting adventure of seeing the world through another’s eyes , feeling with their hands, tasting with their tongue and remembering through their memory. An out of body experience for sure, as well as a bonding exercise. But always keep an eye out for “end results”? Is developing a taste for absinthe or designer drugs “good” for us? How does it benefit our bottom line to cultivate an enjoyment of “ghost cars”?

    Challenge – There is a saying that youth produces Bad Experiences and Bad Experiences develop Good Judgment. But you ought to be able to see some of these Bad Experiences coming because in our competitive capitalistic society these can be wipeout events. How many decades of your life can you devote to unethical corporations, scammy multi-level marketing schemes, bad marriages and “secret” investments? Our time, our youth, our energy and our assets are limited. Open your Dream Journal and sketch out your limits.

    Danger – Regret is a potent force. Sometimes it is possible to be too cautious. But can you just “dip a toe?” The principle of “dollar cost averaging” suggests that you keep “paying yourself back” for investments that offer the promise of paying off big, so that if they suddenly plunge, you will never have actually lost money. This requires that we not get swept up in the experience and maintain a mind unaffected by inebriating substances. Ask yourself honestly, is that possible for me?

    Opportunity – “If everyone else jumped, would you?” Now’s the time for you to develop yourself outside “the group.” How often do you do things because “the group” is doing them? How smart is your group? Who controls it? How close to the cliff ARE you? Think about the nature of leadership. Of models. Once you start evincing discernment you will be challenged but respected. Sometimes you lose your taste for the group, or you find a new group that suits you better. Evolve.

    Models & Mentors – “Good judgment comes from bad experience”

    – Will Rogers

    “At the end of the day, you need someone who listens to you without judgment” – Payal Rohatgi

    “A rush to judgment makes a fair trial hard to get”
    – John Grisham

    “When you judge another you define yourself” – Wayne Dyer

    ‘It is easy to dodge our responsibilities, but hard to dodge the consequences of dodging our responsibilities” – Josiah Stamp

    Mantra – “I judge”

    Meditation –

    #Haiku: After Magritte

    In the dream you play
    Every role –
    Perp, victim,
    Voyeur, Cleaner, Pimp
    Judge

  • #DreamTherapy – Dream Journaling with Alysse Aallyn

    Addiction – Do you dream of imprisonment? Blank walls? Chains? Our neurocircuitry mandates habit-making behavior, but our intelligence usually recognizes when we are trapped, and our dreams send distress signals.

    There’s No Escaping Addiction – But we have tremendous choice over what we become addicted to. Visit an AA meeting and the consumption of sugar and tobacco is outright alarming. Are you addicted to gambling? Do you work in sales? Were you raised in a ritualistic faith? We easily become dependent on praise, on safety, on gratification, and our brains (and our general health) show our dependency. They threaten us when the “treat” is withdrawn.

    Challenge – Open your Dream Journal and list your “Necessary sources of supply: substances and activities you can’t live without. Are you co-dependent? (Addicted to people.) Who? If you fear you are approaching a cliff-edge, you probably are. One test is to go on a “retreat” where your customary gratifications are not available, and attempt to form new gratifications. See what happens! This is such a good idea, we should build it into our lives, periodically. Just to keep us from the cliff-edge. Open-mindedly try all “freeing’ methods until you seize the one that works for you.

    Danger – There is always the chance that we will lose our autonomy. We may want to change, we know we SHOULD change, but we CAN’T. We need outside help. This is the purpose of interventions, to demonstrate to our eyes and ears that we are harming ourselves and our relationships. Denial is a powerful defense mechanism, especially when we think we’ve finally found a substance/process that “magically” allows us to live on our particular cliff-edge – a dangerous job, risky sexual behaviors, threat-filled recreational behaviors. We then have the choice of refusing to listen – giving up our relationships to keep up our self-abuse. Some hardened wretches tell anyone who listens that life itself isn’t worth it without their life-threatening self-abuse. Numbing themselves is the way they “choose” to die.

    Opportunity – You not only CAN free yourself, you MUST. It is a spiritual obligation to live this life as an enlightenment opportunity. Are you familiar with the saying, “Live simply so that others may simply live”? It means sharing honestly with others. That means studying your consumption, and scheduling time to be alone with the universe and with God, to check on the hardiness of your Soul.

    Models & Mentors – “You can’t defeat the darkness by keeping it caged inside you” – Seth Adam Smith

    “All addictions are ways to not feel our feelings”
    – Ellen Burstyn

    “Sometimes you can only find heaven by backing slowly away from hell”
    – Carrie Fisher

    “Success is the sum of small efforts, repeated day in and day out”.

    – Robert Collier

    “The most common way people give up their power is thinking they don’t have any” – Alice Walker

    Mantra – “I feel my life”

    Meditation –

    #Haiku: Addiction

    Brain cells beggared;
    Lovelorn
    Oxytocin receptors misfire
    “Feed me!”

  • #DreamTherapy – DreamJournaling with Alysse Aallyn

    The Rose – Vulnerability – Do you have frequent nightmares? Do you feel helpless in your dreams? Do you dream of children, of your own childhood? In DreamTherapy, the rose represents the soft evanescence of youth when the merest thumbprint of emphasis leaves an eternal impression. As the emblem of beauty, the Rose warns us that this quivering, temporary vulnerability may be the very definition of value as of loveliness.

    We Remember – You well recollect how you were molded. Is it a pleasant nostalgic vision or a horror story? Do you resent all the other actors in this drama? Remember, resentment is a poison we consume – we are the only ones it harms.

    Challenge – Can you turn the building blocks of your own past into a constructive, hopeful framework for the future? Can you mentally accept and explore the beauty of maturity? Let’s open Dream Journal and sketch out the ways.

    Danger – The philosophy that we are “ruinable” is a psychic snare. Terrible things do happen to ordinary people and we can be changed forever; but that is growth. You don’t want to return to a previous incarnation. We may wish specific things hadn’t happened but must keep in mind that regret prevents us from focusing on future reality. We need to understand the world we’re in NOW and map it for those who follow after. Often we can offer our pattern to help others avoid the traps we fell into. In the meantime, we can access history and literature to explore coping mechanisms around disaster and the strong people it produces.

    Opportunity – Resilience is the art we cultivate. We soon realize resilience has its own beauty; one rose may be cut down but the plant is hardly dead, in fact it offers an outpouring of constant roses. That is true beauty.

    Models & Mentors – “Vulnerability is the birthplace of love, belonging, joy, courage, empathy, and creativity”

    • Brene Brown

    “Being vulnerable is the only way to allow your heart to feel true pleasure”
    – Bob Marley

    “Sometimes you have to drop your guard so your heart can breathe”

    – Emma Xu

    “The strongest love is the love that can demonstrate its fragility” – Paulo Coelho

    Mantra – “I transplant”

    Meditation –

    #Haiku: Vulnerability

    Hardening’s spontaneous
    & painful;
    Softening’s practiced;
    & free.

  • #DreamTherapy – Dream Journaling with Alysse Aallyn

    Ambisextrous – Do you dream of being the “opposite” sex? IS there an opposite sex? Are these threatening dreams or pleasurable ones? Do you dream of the fetish trophies of gender; makeup, wigs, shoes, sports equipment? Do you have frequent “freedom” dreams: flying, swimming? Wake up damp, pulses pounding? Sometimes we want to be our own romantic partner, the subject of a lifelong pursuit. This is nothing but the honorable, deep desire to truly know oneself, to master our selfhood before we leave the planet. C.S. Lewis says we are not a body with a soul, we are a Soul with a body.

    Remember – In the Dream, you are everyone. In dreams we confront ourselves, we challenge ourselves, we evolve ourselves. Write in your Dream Journal what it would be like to be your own opposite, your own Desire.

    Challenge – Woody Allen says bisexuality doubles your chances to get a date on Saturday night. Anything wrong with that? Nobody should force themselves to perform sexually; it is important at all times to move as slowly as you feel comfortable with. The sexual revolution was a lot of fun, but it was spoiled for many people by a witless prejudice against “hang-ups.” Revulsion and doubt tell us plenty. We are on this earth to hone our “gut” instinct as well as our sensitivities. Gavin de Becker, danger specialist, reminds us that fear is a “gift.” Honor it.

    Danger – Most “bad sex” stories when one sex disappoints or violates the other, start with substance abuse, undertaken with a nervous desire to get into a more relaxed or even transcendental state. All it actually does is skip over the “informed consent” part that is such an important feature of identity and will. Predators with a need for speed drug their prey! Afterwards the complex feelings of violation an shame take a life time to deal with. These facts mean we need to study trust before we study sex. What is trust? Safety? Honor? Let’s work on those issues while we develop a free space to evolve, experiment and grow.

    Opportunity – Fresh interpretations of gender make this a glorious time to be alive. I can recall when gender was a prison sentence! Now it is an invitation to live more fully, to experience oneself and others more richly, to participate in that fruitful life of which we all dream.

    Mantra – “I become”

    Models & Mentors – “The great gift of human beings is we all have empathy. We can sense a mysterious connection to each other” – Meryl Streep

    “Leadership is about empathy. It is about relating to people for the purpose of inspiring and empowering their lives” – Oprah Winfrey

    “The capacity for empathy leads to a genuine encounter I which heart speaks to heart” – Pope Francis

    “I believe empathy is the most essential quality of civilization” – Roger Ebert

    “Empathy has no script…there is no right way or wrong way…there is only listening, emotionally connecting, communicating the incredibly healing message ‘You’re not alone” – Brene Brown

    Meditation –

    #Haiku – Ambisextrous

    Ambisexuality:
    Joyously roused;
    By beauty
    Everywhere

  • #DreamTherapy – Dream Journaling with Alysse Aallyn

    The Firefly – False Love – Do you dream of masked balls? Betrayals? Loved and known faces turning demonic? People becoming animals? Mazes and puzzles that melt and change?

    Learn to understand these terms: Narcissism, Narcissistic Personality Disorder – Covert and Overt; Love Bombing, Traumatic Bonding, Gaslighting, Projections, DARVO, Emotional Abuse and Emotional Empathy. Write these down in your Dream Journal. They are important.

    You Will Be Offered False Love at some point in your life (for some people, it’s at birth.) Something in you will recognize this, but your conscious self desperately resists this knowledge. Dreams, however, are The Great Revealer.
    Narcissists Lack Empathy. They may be sadistic as a result of their own trauma bonding experiences, but that makes them no less dangerous. They long to kill your innocence and joy to compensate for their lack of these treasured emotions.

    The Firefly is not the only creature using illusion for the purposes of seduction. Seduction is Love-Bombing. They hop to addict you so that you will stay throughout the coming Bad Times, arguing, bargaining, placating and Trying to Figure Out What Went Wrong. This is emotional abuse.

    False Lovers lives in a shifting Potemkin Village of mirrors. This is gaslighting. Narcissists are uninterested in the truth, they are only interested in manipulation; what they can make you do. The main thing they hope to achieve is shifting responsibility for their hopes and needs entirely onto you.

    They, on the other hand, are not responsible for any damage done to you (and if they have their Way, much will be.) This is entirely “your own fault.”

    Projection is the narcissistic claim that others are seeking to destroy them. Guess who’s REALLY seeking to destroy whom? Projection enables DARVO.

    DARVO – Deny: Lies and fabrications follow any confronting.
    Attack: They claim it’s you who is at fault. Brings up something from the past as well to try and show you evidence that you are to blame for their abuse towards you.
    Reverse Victim and Offender: Says that they have been victimized by you, YOU are the abuser, YOU are the narcissist.

    Challenge – Don’t feel sorry for yourself. God put us on this earth to harden Love Warriors for Heaven. You need to know what evil lurks in human hearts, how to recognize, confront and destroy. Just as the deceptive catfish forces the lazy cod to keep moving (and improving!) when they would rather lie sluggishly on the bottom, the False Lover improves our game.

    We realize we are part of a very complex universe where wings disguise themselves as eyes and flowers are chameleons. Stay alert. Realize you are energy. Realize others wish to capture your energy and use it for their own fuel. Get smart.

    Danger – Don’t become a False Lover yourself. Their options are far too restricted. Humans are more than energy. Real Empathy allow us to live multiple lives – to become Immortal like God Herself. Love is more than fuel, it is living water as well as unquenchable fire. It is more than worthwhile to hold out for the Real Thing. Real Love stands the test of Time. We are playing this game to get to the next level, and you can’t do that with such a narrow view of existence, where all of Creation is means to an end – the end of You, slick and fat, lying sluggish at the bottom of the Universe. We are commanded to Rise, and so we will.

    Opportunity – Expand your inner and outer vision. We are multidimensional beings and our emotions – our very orgasms – can become multidimensional as well when we appreciate the historic, the inter-generational, the cosmic ramifications of everything we do and think and are. The marriage service talks about hanging in there through sickness and poverty, and it is a proven fact that people who have been through terrible experiences have a deeper connection. It becomes a secret language others just don’t “understand”. When you have children, you gain the ability to live through them – this is a multi-player, multi-avatar game! Life itself can be a terrible (as well as wonderful) experience. So buckle up! Those who are not alert will be eaten.

    Models & Mentors – “Remember sometimes not getting what you want can be a wonderful stroke of luck”
    – Dalai Lama

    “Let it hurt. Let it bleed. Let it heal. Let it go.” – Nikita Gill

    “Don’t waste your love on someone who doesn’t value it” – Wm Shakespeare

    “Temporary people teach permanent lessons” – Alysse Aallyn

    “Love dies of wounds, errors and betrayals” – Anais Nin

    “Attitude toward gratitude defines a person” – Eli Wiesel

    Mantra – “I rise”

    Meditation –

    Haiku: The Firefly – False Love

    Glitter is
    Hypnotic:
    Brain freezes
    Heartbeat slows
    Wallet
    Disappears

  • #DreamTherapy – Dream Journaling with Alysse Aallyn

    Night – Balance – We are different people in our dreams. We wake up amazed, even ashamed, of the things we wanted, said, did. Who are we, really? Are we the wishes and fears that rush through our subconscious or are we our daytime selves?


    The answer is – we are both. We must balance between the flood of desires and objectives that sleep flushes out.

    For everything there is a season,
    a time for every activity under heaven.

    
A time to be born and a time to die.
    

    A time to plant and a time to harvest.


    A time to kill and a time to heal.
    A time to tear down and a time to build up.


     A time to cry and a time to laugh.
    A time to grieve and a time to dance.


     A time to scatter stones and a time to gather stones.
    A time to embrace and a time to turn away.


     A time to search and a time to quit searching.
    A time to keep and a time to throw away.

    
A time to tear and a time to mend.
    A time to be quiet and a time to speak.


     A time to love and a time to hate.
    A time for war and a time for peace. Ecclesiastes 3

    Balance is a key law of nature to avoid the dreaded death-like stagnancy. Once our conscious is in harmony with our subconscious, our dreams will balance our waking life. In dreams we try on many lives. Even the worst nightmare can be looked at objectively, as a story with potential significance.

    Moderation in All Things – said Hesiod, the Roman poet 750 BC and its still good advice. We use balance as a whetstone to sweeten our pleasures and soften our griefs; torrents that are otherwise unsurvivable.

    Challenge – We need to set up our brain’s “reward system” to handle pleasure and suffering or we will be prescribed drugs in an attempt to achieve the same effect chemically. Drugs can be useful as training wheels; ideally we want to teach our systems to achieve the same effect naturally. Calm is the first step to balance, so we must learn to calm ourselves. Meditation and yoga offer the best methods for reliable self-soothing. First we assert calm over our breath, then our bodies, lastly our thoughts. It’s not that difficult! Reminder: we do it every night as we fall asleep.

    Danger – Unfortunately our contemporary life has become a competitive pursuit of “highs”. A good life well-lived provides natural highs – learning a sport, falling in love, listening to music, having children, enjoying the grandeurs of nature. Our intellect teaches us that every “high” is dramatically enriched by thinking and planning! That’s why we are called the species “homo sapiens.” Therein lies the benefit of Dream Journal.

    The pursuit of highs without the thinking, planning, consolidating and enshrining stages always leads to excess and grief. Highs for their own sake inevitably disappoint, leading to a pursuit of more and more dangerous highs, which, if we are not thinking about them, sharing them with others and incorporating them into our beings, damage our core ability to experience joy.

    Opportunity – Joy that is held in the mind and considered is joy endlessly re-experienced. It will be yours forever, and you will be able to share it with all the people you love for the rest of your life. Conscious dreaming (often called lucid dreaming) provides the best avenue to filter these experiences down to your subconscious level. Always have a joy to think about just as you are going to sleep, and another for when you are waking up. This will sharpen your apprehension of ecstasy and deepen your life.

    Models & Mentors – “The key is not to prioritize what’s on your schedule but to schedule your priorities” – Stephen Covey

    “Don’t get so busy making a living that you forget to make a life” – Dolly Parton

    Mantra – “I balance”

    Meditation –

    #Haiku: Stability

    To assert balance;
    Employ wealth of
    Eternal universal mind

  • #DreamTherapy – Dream Journaling with Alysse Aallyn

    Mourning – Detachment – What if, in your dreams you hurt? You can’t put your finger on it, yet when you wake up you feel such shuddering emptiness and loss it’s a physical relief to find your dream wasn’t real. Lots of people fear such sadness as some kind of prophecy. In your sleep, you are mourning something – but what? It’s enough to make a person fear sleep.

    We Need to Mourn – Sadness is not allowed in a society where perfect strangers feel comfortable demanding you “smile.” Look at all these Instagram feeds with everybody grinning away because they’re having so much FUN and their lives are so PERFECT they never wake up shuddering with sadness. Except they are human too, so we know that they DO.
    They’re just better at covering it up than we seem to be. (And some people, admittedly are just plain shallower.)

    Are we mourning past lives? Are we mourning lives unlived? This inevitably means we have a lot of mourning to catch up on. We don’t recall our process of bargaining and acceptance so all that’s left is denial and depression. Not only that, the “causes” of your lost mourning seem so inconsequential to our “adult” selves. “So your pet died when you were five, everybody says. Your parents got a divorce. You moved five times. Get over it, already!” Time to accept the power and significance of your own feelings and the place of mourning in your life.

    Challenge – Time to feel compassion for yourself. Open your Dream Journal and ask the question, why are you dreaming these things now? Sometimes something going on in our lives reminds of that past unhealed hurt. Sometimes our collective unconscious is feeling other people’s suffering. It’s OK to think about that sadness, especially if it makes us feel closer to other people. Everyone has these lost, wrecked treasures submerged in their lives. Celebrate the fact that you are able to feel so deeply in a world where others are forced to punish themselves, take risks and drugs in order to “feel something.”

    Danger – Cultivate detachment. Learn to say goodbye. Take a breath. Let go of the toxic elements in your life. Go “no-contact” on toxic people. Read up on sadism, the better to understand the people out there who feed off and enjoy your suffering. Buddhists recommend surveying your thoughts and feelings from a distance, as in hypnotherapy, then setting them free. This is not dissociation. Dissociation is more like floating through life with all our systems repressed, feeling numb. Dissociation is not good. It’s not that you don’t care, it’s that you can use that pool of tears to respond more intensely to life, to art, to music, and to each other.

    Opportunity – Resilience is our most powerful survival trait. This means that after blight, we can flourish more strongly, just the way pruned plants will. It’s not necessary to explore all the caverns of your being, but it will make you stronger. Once again, choose a buddy and a guide. Think about the “hero’s journey” story you respond to most deeply. In your Dream Journal, imagine explaining your hero’s journey to someone else. Feel free to use pictures, symbols and metaphors. After all, when we were children we did feel our world to be populated by monsters and the supernatural.

    Models & Mentors – “Detachment is power. Release all things that no longer work for you” – Shane Steele

    “To be detached means to dive so fully into the experience you dropout the other side… with full understanding you can say, “Now that I know, I can let go”
    – Teal Swan

    “In detachment lies the wisdom of uncertainty…freedom from our prison of past conditioning…willingness to step into the unknown surrenders us to the creative mind that orchestrates the dance of the universe…” – Deepak Chopra

    “I release the subjective thoughts, energy and emotions I am holding about people, places and things that kept me trapped in dis-ease…I can step back and allow the feelings & thoughts & energy to dissipate…I am then free to act with compassion, love & acceptance” – Angela James

    “Attachment is the fabricator of illusions – reality can be attained only by one who is detached” – Simone Weil

    “Detachment is having your life be about you, not about other people”
    – Karen Casey

    Mantra – “I release”

    Meditation –

    #Haiku: Detachment

    In the last phase of grief
    bless your wrestling angel –
    grow scar tissue wings

  • #DreamTherapy – Dream Journaling with Alysse Aallyn

    Planets & Stars – Eternity –Do you dream of astronomical events? Are you circling the stars in dreamland? Do you find yourself studying vast deserts, steep, empty mountains, person-less vistas? These are eternity dreams. You are struggling not with questions of death or afterlife, but the “ongoing everythingness” of reality itself. What is “time”? How long can “time” continue if nothing is “alive”?

    You Are Training to be Immortal – Immortality is neither desirable nor guaranteed. If you feel a desire to live “forever” – what is the “you” in that sentence? Matter is already immortal – Your body is composed of exploded stars. Are you afraid of the “next phase”; or do you want a certain period of your existence to continue “indefinitely’? But you know that’s impossible and ultimately very undesirable. Change is life – changelessness is stagnation. Without human life, planets and stars continue to evolve. Eternity, like God, must be outside time. Perhaps what you desire is a continuation of your personal memories and consciousness. Would you ever want to know the terrible things God knows, or do you yearn for a safe return to infancy secure inside the arms of a most loving mother? Open your Dream Journal and spend some time considering your own desires. Which are evanescent, and which are everlasting?

    Challenge – Some people feel so angry and violated by life that they want to harm the future itself. They don’t want anyone to be happy, ever. While admitting that life on earth can be very unfair and terrible, you don’t ever want to be one of those people. They have “eternalized” their own misery. That is hell; they themselves have sent themselves there. You could wish to eternalize your finest moments, when you brimmed over with love, when generosity and joy poured out of you.

    Danger – Ultimate judgment is not up to us. We don’t know everything, our empathy and compassion are not boundless, we cannot “see” in all directions and dimensions. We are forced to make snap judgments on the ground, battlefield decisions an quick-time changes; but we must leave finality to God. Arrogance and solipsism are serious blinders that harm our spirit as they harm others and the planet itself.

    Opportunity – We are offered repeated opportunities for growth, for humility, for insight. We need to take advantage of these, all the while admitting that since life is a see-saw process, it is usually two steps forward and one step back. How can we recognize growth sand proceed in that direction? Growth manifests health, while harm plunges everyone into darkness. We can feel compassion without knowledge. Mentally we can wish others to avoid suffering and the roots of suffering even when we don’t understand what those are even for ourselves. Take every opportunity to meaningfully connect with others. Your spirit will automatically lighten.

    Models & Mentors – “Trust in dreams – they are the hidden gate to eternity” – Khalil Gibran

    “Launch yourself on every wave, find your eternity in each moment”
    – Henry David Thoreau

    “What we do in life echoes in eternity” – Marcus Aurelius

    ‘Love is the emblem of eternity, effacing memory of its beginning and all fear of its end” – Mme. De Stael

    Mantra – “I progress”

    Meditation –

    #Haiku: Age

    Occlude self –
    Elide “forever” –
    Include all:
    Blue print eternity