Alysse Aallyn

Category: #PersonalChange

  • Becoming a Goddess – The Goddess Oracle by Alysse Aallyn

    22. Age – Wisdom

    Goddesses Embody Wisdom and Wisdom Is Hard-Won. Is it time to make peace with your elders?  Do you feel you require an experienced hostage negotiator to free you from an infestation of the past?  Have you been dreaming of old people? Funerals? Aging in general? Dreaming of gurus atop mountains?  Buddhas, caves, palaces of wisdom?  Or are you fixating on a specific elder who had an influence – bad or good – on your young life?

    The Goddess’ Effort Is Sacred – Failure is when you don’t try. Experience is the great teacher. Bad Judgment leads to Experience which leads to Wisdom which leads to Good Judgment.

    You Are Wiser Than You Know –– Contrast elders you admire with those you avoid. Aren’t the latter complainers who stress to everyone they meet what a bad hand life has dealt them? They complain about their health, politics, the weather, other people – whatever crosses the windscreen of their increasingly tightening minds. In their world children never call, doctors don’t help, media is lying, weather’s getting worse, food is adulterated and we are all going to hell. This person is clamoring ever more loudly for ego strokes without apparently noticing the discomfort and distaste of those around them. Rather than trying a new strategy, they step up their whingeing.

    Read the Room! Is what you want to scream at them but you realize they can no longer “learn.” This is the opposite of wisdom. This is senility. A brain is shutting down, a personality is beggared and no one wants to be around it.

    Think of an Elder you Admire. Nelson Mandela, Joe Biden, St. Joan, Desmond Tutu, The Dalai Lama, Deepak Chopra, Oprah Winfrey, Pema Chodron, the Pope? These persons are Ego-Less.  Someone who talks about others, not themselves. They authentically care for others. They discuss ideas rather than gossip and have a long memory of problems, solutions, trial and error. They keep themselves “young” in all the ways that matter. People flock to them.

    There’s an Old Cherokee Story about how each of us is born with a good wolf and a bad wolf inside of us. The one that gets stronger and takes control is the one you feed.  Your challenge is to figure out how to practice your increasing wisdom every day. Accepting your dreams and encouraging their deepening understanding is the beginning of wisdom.

    The Pursuit of Gurus is Inherently Dangerous because there are a lot of con artists out there seeking hostages and slaves. Avoid dominance/submission games and people who use any of the following interpersonal techniques:

    1. They’re never “wrong.” Nothing is ever their fault. Only they know what is fashionable, appropriate and right. You are always wrong.
    1. Circular conversations, ad hominem arguments, projection and gaslighting –  They are the gate-keepers of reason and you the thirsty aspirant who will never succeed without their help.
    1. People only capable of hierarchical –  vertical, not horizontal relationships. Someone needs to be “on top.” It will never be “your turn.” You will always be dragooned into doing their bidding.
    1. Blanket statements and generalizations – Thick layers of protective blather will keep you from getting through to discuss any task at hand.
    1. Misrepresenting your thoughts and feelings to the point of absurdity – You are a poorly educated simplistic thinker and a deficient reasoner and they are in on all the secrets and are  the source of all wisdom. There’s no “cooperating” with these people.
    1. Nitpicking and moving the goal posts – Different rules for everyone and every day.
    1. Changing the subject to evade accountability – “This is your fault – You shouldn’t have given me that job to begin with.”
    1. Covert and overt threats –“If people know what you REALLY are, say, do, no one would be your friend.”
    1. Name-calling , stigmatizing, limiting– “Identity politics.” “You are a ___” Fill in the blank. And that’s all you’ll ever be in this guy’s eyes.
    1. Destructive conditioning – Abuse, frustration and disrespect are this person’s calling cards but it’s never their fault that they live in a cloud of toxicity. They want you in there, too. Decline.
    1. Smear campaigns and stalking – Endless power struggles. “Office politics.” Need I say more?
    1. Playing the Martyr – “Everyone’s lying about me. I have so many enemies!”
    1. Demands Immediate Unthinking Fealty – When someone stresses the fact that they are a “nice guy” or girl, that you should “trust them” right away or emphasizes their credibility without any provocation from you whatsoever, WALK AWAY.
    1. Baits and badgers you – testing your limits. Can you be made to lose control?
    1. Boundary testing –  “You owe me”  – “You’re committed” – “Everyone does it” to drag you into unethical enterprise
    1. Aggressive jabs disguised as jokes – “Can’t you laugh about yourself? Everyone else is laughing.”
    1. Condescending sarcasm and patronizing tone – Know-It-Alls

    No One Using the Above Techniques has your best interests at heart.

    Our Scars Define Beauty -You can see this struggle is all about Control. Goddesses avoid those who seek to control or dominate. Revered Elders such as those mentioned above would not do that. Treat others with respect and expect respect yourself.

    Goddesses Know Their Allies – Goddess don’t fear becoming experienced. We seek it. People come and go, but the right ones stay. Time shows you the difference between the strength and honor of another’s heart. Goddesses share their knowledge without fear of competition. We know we are unreproduceable.

    Goddesses Can Read the Signs – If you don’t believe in yourself, no one else will. Train yourself to trust yourself. You can read and write maps, you can interpret Nature, you see Red Flags before they wave for others.

    Goddesses Earn Peace – Random acts of kindness make everyone feel better. Goddess’ “can do” attitude spreads peace. Goddess welcome other peaceful spirits. We challenge the troubled to take their drama elsewhere.

    Models & Mentors – “You can’t control the wind but you can learn to adjust your sails.” – Jimmy Dean

    “It always seems impossible till it’s done.” – Nelson Mandela

    “Knowledge speaks but wisdom listens” – Jimi Hendrix

    “I am thankful to those who said No. Because of them, I did it myself.”

    – Albert Einstein

    “Experience is not what happens to you, but what you do with what happens to you.” – Aldous Huxley

    “It is never too late to be who you might have been” – George Eliot

    ‘Wisdom is the journey no one can take for us” – Marcel Proust

    #Haiku: Noble Heart

    Sit

    In peace;

    Regroup;

    Regift

    The rubble of your life

    Belongs to All.

  • Becoming a Goddess – the Goddess Oracle by Alysse Aallyn

    The Moon – Influence

    Goddesses Plan Their Path. Time to re-calibrate your subconscious influences and bring them into mindfulness. What subconscious influences? You don’t “know” this pressure with your rational mind, but you can “feel” it down in your animal soul. Something is pressing on you, like gravity, the way the moon’s pressure rolls and presses on our tidal waters.

    Goddesses Understand Their Secrets – You begin, like everyone, as a secret to yourself.  Your subconscious has the answers. Yet she only reveals herself covertly. Time for some dream interpretation. Object dreams are fear dreams, people dreams are love dreams, motion dreams are future dreams. Don’t look for rigid accuracy – we seek connections, not edges, interpretations, not walls and blocks. The purpose of dreaming is to splinter blocks. If you are a writer, automatic writing reveals what you think about. Collect pictures that speak to you and collage them from insight. Try to name the figures.

    Goddess Are in Tune with the Universe – The opposite of fear, remember, is attraction, the opposite of love is hate and the opposite of forward yearning for the future is stasis. Each life pulse contains its opposite. Goddesses must learn many languages, of which the most important are non-verbal. The sky, the moon, the stars, the animals, history, the past, the plants, the dead, the future – all are reaching out to you. Be unafraid to listen and interpret.

    Goddess Are Aware of the Unseen – We are all under influences of forces we have never even heard of, yet the Goddess’s Quest is to own their Self and present it in its most beautiful incarnation, to God, as worthy of  Immortality. To understand who we are at our core is to perfect our obligation of thriving and giving.

    Goddess Danger – We seek to heighten, not damage, your self-will. Others in your life – relative, friends, advertisers, politicians – are trying to take control of you. Don’t let them. The way to stop that is to take control of your fears yourself, so that you will never be ruled by them. Always seek a way upward. The direction of the spiral must always be UP.

    Some influences are demonic and purely destructive. We stand up to them, we name them, we reject them. We learn their weaknesses and their targets. If necessary, we will battle them.

    Goddess Challenge – Recognize Health, in yourself and others. Promote growth in yourself and others. Goddesses may refuse to engage, but they never cut people down. Take time for retreat, to build yourself and your powers and to recognize and name where you have come from and what you have battled. Treasure your Goddess Journal, share it, learn to profit from the trainings and maps of others. Build partnerships. Work on your Gratitude Practice – this is a glorious universe the God/Goddess deigns to share with us; from Love alone.

    Models & Mentors – “Moonlight drowns out all but the brightest stars” – J. R. R Tolkien

    “Like the Moon, come out from behind the clouds. Shine!”– Buddha

    “Everyone is a Moon, and has a dark side he never shows to anybody”- Mark Twain

    “The moon gives pure solitude and tranquility”

    – Haruki Murakami

    #Haiku: The Echo

    Sharp night; cold

    Moon; shush your chatter.

    Naked

    Pond consecrates

    Abandon.

  • Becoming a Goddess – the Goddess Oracle by Alysse Aallyn

     Dreams – Imagination

    Should You Ever Wake up? The first thing that is obvious to an incipient, infant goddess is that Reality is often abhorrent, that everyone knows this and that they are not doing enough about it. Everyone insists they are just too small to tackle or challenge this massive Thing. And yet the incipient, adolescent goddess notices the Power of the Idea. Particularly the Self-Fulfilling Notion of Self-Determination. It’s not easy to become whoever you want, but it’s impossible to become anybody without wanting it. Your dreams “know” everything before you do.

    Do you long for caretaking? Are you eager to give over the reins of your life to someone else? If so, you are not a goddess. The deepest desire of Goddessing is not being interfered with on out majestic passage through Eternity.  But people will keep trying to take charge of you and redefine you. They will tell you ridiculous things – such as, Imagination is Bad, or it’s a waste of time. Remember – As Goddess, you’re the Pilot. 

    Are Your Dreams Scary, Unmanageable and Unsatisfying?  Then it is time for you to take charge of your power – to admit that you are in control of your own brain.

    Look forward to dreaming. I like waking up in the early dawn because when I go back to sleep I can set an intention for dreaming – all the best dreams (and the most memorable ones) happen at the very end of sleep while you are coming up through the layers of sub- to semi-consciousness.

    Goddesses Are in Tune With Their Inner Voice – Jung tells us that in your dreams, you are everyone. Every life you have ever lived and every life you will ever live comes to you through your dreams.

    Goddesses Are Seekers – We are self-defining. Self-validating. We are on a quest. Goddess experience to the fullest the nature of having a self. Become alert to the possibilities inherent in this particular incarnation and explore.  Feel free to release your imagination.

    Dream Journal – Start a dream journal. Date it, and write, “I want to dream about…” Fill in the blank. Be as detailed and specific as you can manage. It is OK to allow your waking mind to construct desirable dreams – great works of art got their start in just this way! You may hear a voice… someone from the past who discouraged your “day-dreaming” and wanted you to focus on your work, on the present and on them. Explore this memory fearlessly. It is not rejecting or “hating on” that person to disagree with them – there are certainly times when the priority is to focus on other things – but right now you are exploring your own brain and testing out its powers. Clearly that’s an important and necessary project. Gently take control from this Remembered Forbidder and say, “This is my time now. I am in charge.”

    Goddess Danger – We all know the cautionary tale of Scary Guy Who Lives for Video Games and Doesn’t Have a Life. Do you secretly fear that the power of dreams and the pleasures of daydreaming will suck you away from Real World Competence? They won’t – so long as you are reality centered. You will become a  fount of different outcomes and speculative futures with a gift for turning powerful desires into workable avenues of growth and advancement.

    Positive Dreaming Deepens and Enhances, doesn’t evade reality. It’s just that reality is so much wilder – and we are so much more powerful than we can credit!

    Dream Group – Reaching out for allies is always a good idea. Form a Dream Group with others to share the content of your dreams and listen to their fresh interpretations.  You can even try Group Dreaming. Lie on the floor holding hands in semi-darkness playing drowsy music. Share whatever comes up. These are models for your future. Goddesses believe growth goes on forever – even after death. But this path must be chosen.

    Models & Mentors – “I dream things that never were and I say, “Why Not?” – George Bernard Shaw

    “A dreamer finds his way by moonlight…sees dawn before the rest of the world.” – Oscar Wilde

    ‘You have within you the strength, the patience and the passion to reach for the stars to change the world”

    – Harriet Tubman

    “I’ve had dreams, and I’ve had nightmares. I overcame the nightmares because of my dreams.” – Jonas Salk

    #Haiku: Human Clay Sculpts Angel Wings

    We’re all

    Dirt:

    Humble beginnings launch

    Celestial imaginings

  • Becoming a Goddess – the Goddess Oracle by Alysse Aallyn

    The Shadow – Dissonance

    Why Become a Goddess? – Innocents assume that being a goddess means being the center of continuous adulation.  Although people do admire you, competitive pushback is much more common. This alone is usually enough to encourage most women back into the fold. Why ever leave the Approval Matrix and strike out on your own? 

    Dissonance is why. As William Penn, (1644-1718) founder of Pennsylvania considered pacifism, he asked the great Quaker philosopher George Fox (1624-1691) how long he should wear his ceremonial sword, and Fox answered: “As long as you can.” In other words, until you can bear it no longer. When the dissonance overwhelms us, then we must act.

    Goddess Are Sensitive Instruments registering seismic shifts and deep tectonic disturbances below the threshold of consciousness. Something always IS “going on” and you have studied long enough to be alert to the many warning signals! This can be exhausting. We long for relaxation, peace and quiet, a clear blue sky without a single cloud.

    Goddesses’ Feet Find Their Own Path – Enviable, maybe, but scary also. We consider the unseen. Dreaming of reversals?  Sudden surprises? Creeping sense of unease? Upsets? Do you wake with a sense of having forgotten something important you almost understood?

    Who Approves the Approvers? – You’re just not comfortable in the Approval Matrix. Possibly you don’t like or trust the people whose approval you supposedly need. Getting that sneaking suspicion you’ve wandered into a masquerade? You try to learn the rules, but the rules keep changing. You can tell they’re moving the goalposts but no one’s allowed to comment. By the time you arrive, the “promise” has mysteriously “expired.”

    Impostor Syndrome – Are we the fake, or is it everyone around us who’s faking it? “Fake it till you make it” seems to be the rule. But is the game worth playing? Goddesses step away into an arena all their own, where they find the freedom to uncover their true selves. Your Goddess Journal reflects the Goddess Reality. Meditation will reveal your wholeness to you.

    Activate Your Spidey Senses – First, uncover your real self. This ought to be the easy part! Everyone has a self – right? If only! From our earliest memory, not only was “love” conditional but ALL rewards were. We wanted to find out who we really were and what we were capable of but it never seemed the right time. 

    Be the Person Not Determined By An Algorithm. Let’s start by taking our suspicions seriously – you’re not paranoid if they’re REALLY out to get you.

    Goddess Challenge –The key to intelligent management of dissonance is to think of the world as an orchestra playing a symphony. The more able we are to distinguish the varied instruments and musical lines the more we will appreciate and enjoy the experience. Schedule regular periods of rest, rebalancing and renewal.

    Goddess Danger – Avoid a “bunker mentality.” You’re not looking for a hidey-hole. The universe has many bunkers, but is bigger than any single one. Goddesses belong to eternity – that is the whole point of Goddessing. We must cultivate a hierarchy of response. We get out of bed in the middle of the night for a fire alarm, not a phone notification. 

    Loneliness Is Not Required – Don’t allow yourself to become dismissive and numb but seek out like-minded souls.  You will recognize who can provide advice and encouragement and a healthy growth process. Curate your group to promote intelligent awareness in an atmosphere of hope. Dissonance and dormancy are not doom.

    Resistance Is Never Futile – We each will be given a chance to spend our night on the watchtower, but you don’t need to spend every night there. Consider dissonance and discord invitations to accept maturity. We are putting away childish things. The sky is NOT falling, but the climate is under legitimate scientific threat. Strategize ways to take useful action. This is an opportunity to show self-love, as well as love for the group, the environment, the world and the future. The attitude, “I care about you so I’m going to take care of you”,  keeps us sensitive to the message of Universal Love that is always waiting breathlessly to embrace us.

    Suit Up for the Long Haul – Goddesses increase their peripheral senses. Learn how to check for honesty. Test for reality. Check past accounts. Interview friends AND enemies. Is somebody pushing too hard? Trying to “sign you up?” How do they treat wait-staff? Do they speak disrespectfully of others? What’s their philosophy of life?

    When It’s Too Good to Be True – That often means the trap is just about to be sprung. Goddess think for themselves.

    Models & Mentors – Great things are not accomplished by those who yield to fads, trends and popular opinion”

    – Jack Kerouac

    “Better to fail in originality than succeed in imitation”

    – Herman Melville

    “If you don’t fit in, you’re probably doing the right thing” – Henry David Thoreau

    “Conformity is the jailer of freedom and the enemy of growth” – John F. Kennedy

    #Haiku: Depth Psychology

    Substrata

    Dissonance?

    Game on!

    Unearth yourself –

    Transect core

    Meanings

  • Becoming a Goddess – the Goddess Oracle by Alysse Aallyn

    Duality – Ambivalence

    Some People Prefer Risk.   They don’t feel alive unless the situation is dangerous. What kind of goddess are you? The dangerous kind? Can you rush eternity? A hastened Immortality might not happen. More typical is ambivalence. We both want and don’t want – at the same time.

    How Many Different Goddesses Are You? Sometimes we dream disturbingly about things we don’t want and people we aren’t. Feminists dream of rape, vegetarians dream of meat, pacifists dream of fighting.  It’s confusing. What gives?

    Language Isn’t Subtle Enough to Explain You – Your personality manifests all feelings, all thoughts, all ideas, rippling through you in a vast subconscious river. Everyone’s does; not only those who choose to be Immortal. Your unconscious connects with the “collective unconscious” of all other humans – dead, alive, even fictional. They ripple through you regularly. That’s where all your ‘strange thoughts” and “other personalities” come from.

    Why isn’t “hate-love” a word? You experience that regularly. How about “fear-attraction”? Common! What I’m suggesting is that we need to accept the fact that a “personality” is a dynamism, not a label.

    Goddess Challenge – Facing your own fluid multiplicity might seem the toughest part, but it isn’t for artists, who routinely “play” along their edge, peeking over it and imagining life on the other side. Art is the best way to express this, an enormous relief since it’s non-committal. You can stop experimenting any time you choose. It’s a goddess power also. Of course, you’ll have to face the surprise of your relatives when your work becomes public: “Where did THAT come from?” But if truth be told, we’ve always been surprised we’re related to those people.

    Goddess Danger – Society seeks to label, limit and stigmatize. Everyone is afraid of becoming what they fear but Goddesses need to explore and ultimately manage our fear. A simple safe word won’t work when people – bankers, politicians, therapists, employers – are so fundamentally untrustworthy. That is why our identification of ourselves as Brave Goddess is so vital. The vastness of our potential can never be controlled by language. We will never be butterflies pinned down in a museum box for the instruction/curiosity of others.

    Goddess Opportunity – Appreciate your Multiplicitous Self.  Don’t slam the door on any of your potentialities too soon. Sometimes the worst labeler, the most determined jailor, is our own punitive psyche. We are deeply afraid of wandering in the forest and losing the way to get home safe. But Goddesses carry Home within them. As Nelson Mandela used to quote from his prison cell, if we are the captains of our  souls we can be the masters of our fates. (Henley.) We can learn to tolerate a little ambiguity/uncertainty/ambivalence.

    Goddess Tolerate Uncertainty – Being a goddess is all about balance.  The experience of balance-seeking is indescribable linguistically – it must be felt experientially. Goddesses learn to live in a world beyond language where we can savor uncertainty and foretaste eternity.

    Goddess Relish Paradox – Two contraries not only exist together but empower each other – that creative tension is the lifeblood of emotion, imagination and personality.

    Goddess Coast on the Knife-Edge of Ambivalence – The desired is undesirable, the only possibility is impossible and the act of wanting forbids getting. In the Multiverse (Eternity) all your impossibles are actually happening. Goddesses must become comfortable with the pleasures of this dance: “My future dissolves in beads of sweat, my present is my mirror, my past’s a shape-shifting whirligig.” (Aallyn)

    Even Leaders Must Contemplate the Power of  Surrender – We contemplate Everything. Physics is magic and dreams embody history. This quantum world of “spooky entanglements” is one in which we goddesses become expert. We accept not only that the cave we fear holds the treasure we desire, but that we are both cave and treasure, indeed, fear itself.

    Models & Mentors –  “It seems we are capable of immense love and loyalty and as capable of deceit and atrocity. It is this shocking ambivalence that makes us unique.” – John Scott

    “Ambivalence is a wonderful tune to dance to. It has a rhythm all its own.”

    – Erica Jong

    “The Simpsons is about alienation and the ambivalence of living with a family who you love but drives you crazy”

    – Matt Groening

    “Poetry is the home of ambiguity, ambivalence and uncertainty.” – Billy Collins

    #Haiku: Yin/yang

    Inclined to spring forward

    Fade back; yin;

    Urge to return?

    Float forward;

    Yang.

  • Becoming a Goddess – the Goddess Oracle

    1. Danger – Risk –

    Do Goddesses Worry?  Are we anxiety driven? Haunted by nightmares and worst-case scenarios? Do you wake up gasping and trying to forget what you’ve just experienced?

    Goddesses Are Prophetic – Nightmares mean you’re paying attention. Being a goddess doesn’t mean you’re controlling events, it describes the type of human you aspire to be. Life is scary, but we need to grow, and growth requires we learn to cultivate risk if we are ever to expand and venture outside our comfort zone.

    The Number One Complaint About Becoming a Goddess? – Fear management. You will be a target. The only way to manage fear? Become a Goddess. In other words, accepting the Divine Mandate is growth – you are the green pushing up through concrete. You really have no choice.

    Can Goddesses Be Damaged or Destroyed?  Certainly! In a world of mediocrity, we dare. That make our takedown an inviting goal for jealous demons.

    Study risk intelligently. Are demons symbolic? No. I’ve personally met several. They are worthy of study. Where does your fear come from? If from an outside force, study him. No point being “afraid” of “foreigners” if the man telling us to be afraid has a reputation for befriending people and then fleecing them. If the fear comes from your gut, treat it respectfully. Read The Gift of Fear by Gavin de Becker. (Public Library)

    Managing Fear:

    1. Don’t rely on rumor and innuendo
    1. Dangers must be proven Real
    1. Dangers Need to be Historically verified by data: “How likely is injury?”
    1. Assemble likely risk-avoidance strategies that have performed well for others in your situation.
    1. What exactly is your situation? Quantify.
    1. Know who your allies are
    1. Be prepared to alter strategy to maximize success and to learn from mistakes

    Goddess Training – Goddesses study, identify and rise above the challenges. Learn to make sophisticated risk assessments and pick your battles cleverly. To do that, goddess need a Purpose. Your Immortality if offered in exchange for you operating as an enlightening force in a dark space. 

    Unexpected Benefit: Fair-weather Friends Scatter. Friends respect and want the best for you, but the relationship must be reciprocal. You agree to have each other’s backs. But some “friends” are attracted only by your light and when that is threatened, they either hide or assist the attacker. Know the difference between a Team and a Gang. Gangs work to suck power from individual members and concentrate it in one individual. Teams work for the success of all. Coach can’t win if the team doesn’t win.

    Goddesses Enjoy the Test – Goddesses relish testing their and mental physical abilities constantly against life’s games & mazes

    Goddesses Transform – The physical pleasure of meeting the moment cannot be overstated. Soon the training itself becomes a rush of joy. When you are making love to the universe you can feel the universe loving you back. This is what immortality feels like.

    Can Goddesses Be Defeated? – There are no defeats, there are only lessons. Everything is practice for The Greater Contest.

    Won’t You Ultimately Lose? Truly, we all die, some sooner, some less dignified. As a Goddess, this is where your purpose upholds you as you transform into your Immortal Incarnation. What this will be, none of us knows. Study your models. What allowed Nelson Mandela to be “captain of his soul” after more than 20 years in brutal captivity? Are we just bodies? Or are we also souls? Are our souls so easily defeated? Can we also train, test and transform our souls?

    Remember –  a caterpillar’s “defeat” is a butterfly.

    Models & Mentors – “Extreme Fear can neither fight nor fly.”

    – William Shakespeare

    “Courage is resistance to fear, mastery of fear, not absence of fear” – Mark Twain

    “If you try to get rid of fear and anger without knowing their meaning, they will return stronger” – Deepak Chopra

    “We’re more often frightened than hurt, and we suffer more from imagination than reality.” – Seneca

    #haiku: Everything

    Everything you’ve

    Ever wanted

    Is on the other side

    Of fear

  • Becoming a Goddess – the Goddess Oracle

    Recovery – Rebirth

      Goddesses Re-Imagine Themselves. This is a consequential power. You are not condemned to your past; not even to your biology. You are completely free to be whomever you choose – and to evolve in any way you choose. 

      You Know You Are A Goddess When: Have you been dreaming of rebirth?  Second chances? Starting over? Do you wake up in the middle of the night screaming, “Mulligan!”

      Isn’t Rebirth Really “Recovery”?  Recovery is what happens we repel a demonic force that kept us in thrall – could be addiction, illusion, corruption, compulsive behavior; even a poisonous culture.   Were we hostage to another human being who didn’t want the best for us?  Goddesses claim absolute freedom: this requires deep thought about our best interests. Freedom to do “anything” doesn’t serve us well. Freedom to “advance”, to “evolve” is what we crave.

      “The Bad News is Time Flies – the Good News is, You’re the Pilot.”  As our brains clear we get ideas. Ernest Hemingway used to say we are “stronger at the broken places”; Nietzsche expressed it as “what doesn’t kill me makes me stronger”. Healing provides peace as well as joy.  We give thanks that we have begun the journey.

      Starting Over Is About Expecting to Stumble.  Watching toddlers try to “rise and walk” we consider it lucky that they don’t mind being laughed at. (In fact, they love it.)  It takes them time to figure out this new challenge.  Like beginning skiers, they cling to objects, sway exaggeratedly back and forth, slam into things, and plop down SPLAT; not just once or twice but over and over.  The toddler hasn’t been born who suddenly vaults up suavely and starts swanning around in a sophisticated manner. Embrace the last step of Recovery: “Expect to go splat.” Of course we don’t WANT to – fingers crossed –  it’s dangerous and bruising.  We’d better arrange to have someone around – just in case.

      Do Goddesses Fall? Of course! Read Edith Hamilton’s Mythology is you have any doubts.

      You Don’t Fail Unless You Refuse to Rise Again. Don’t even bother counting the times you were “brave”.  It’s only the “getting back up” that counts. As long as you’re doing that, you’re a true winner.

      Goddess Danger – Life never goes the way we planned.  There’s the excitement of finding a plan, investigating goals, making them ours, and committing to the plan – and then there’s living the plan. Suddenly we don’t know how to get through the next ten minutes – worse, we make a “big mistakes” unconsciously. The rational self we’ve planned for fails to show up and instead we turn into some irrational monster who threatens murder when momentarily frustrated. This is like sport-learning. Allow each new behavior to penetrate every fiber of your whole body. Rehearse over and over. (10,000 times?)  It’s ALL mistakes at first.

      Concepts of “Perfection” and “Purity” Require Re-thinking and Re-framing. This exercise is more like forming calluses over tender new skin. It feels funny at first, sore. It might actually “hurt.” We’re on the early steps of a long journey to a wonderful place; and we won’t get there unless we forgive ourselves, pick ourselves up and keep going.

      Goddess Opportunity – To “acquire” some things means also to “surrender” others. Learning what to surrender to guarantee our lightness and power is part of being a goddess.

      Ever heard of a “dry drunk”?  The phrase refers to the state of envying those who “indulge” and feeling that we are somehow lesser, damaged beings because we “can’t.” How does this regret pertain to the goddess’s pledge of superior living? Contrast your planned empowerment with others’ benumbed abandon. Think about what this means. 

      Goddesses never envy loss of consciousness. We enhance consciousness.  

      Do Goddesses feel pain? Of course. (See Mythology.) Isn’t it always better to remove the source of the pain, the shame we are escaping from? Is the nostalgic fantasy of mental sleep Normals yearn for really some faint memory of union, with a lost, beloved Other? What would it mean to give up these blind yearnings, this cultivated pain and these unbearable memories to lead a fresh, released and intentional life? It means accepting and becoming a new self in all our exquisitely uniqueness, exploring everything that implies. Recovery is “self-forgiveness”; going forward with a clear-eyed, honest appraisal of ourselves, resources and desires. “I am free”

      Goddesses Crest the Wave – Most people have too narrow a self-definition to dare to try new things, but daring and courage are essential features of being a Goddess. Just because something sounds uncomfortable doesn’t mean we won’t someday like it so much we make it part of ourselves. If you’re used to sleeping on the floor, going without breakfast and struggling with a new language, you’ve learned to be unafraid of those things.

      Goddesses Are Cagey – We don’t expose ourselves to unnecessary danger. We are constantly developing our safety instincts to recognize insecure situations before they get out of control. A main reason for frugality is that situations can become “too comfortable” – your senses are being dulled! Sharpening senses is what Goddesses are all about!

      Goddesses Are Reborn Many Times – Creating our own maps means we go many wrong ways before we find the right one! It’s the process. Throughout our quest we transform ourselves many times to incorporate our new knowledge.

      Self-Definition Is Key – Should you be ashamed of taking a wrong turn? Or confident because you figured it out, and proud that you were able to change? Your body is completely new every seven years. You welcome every new day. You are eager to meet new people and find out what makes them tick. You like putting yourself in new situations and figuring out how to cope. Read “Survival” manuals and try out escape rooms with your friends. Explore the sport of orienteering.

      Models & Mentors – “Rock bottom became the solid foundation on which I rebuilt my life” – J.K. Rowling

      “The airplane takes off against the wind, not with it” – Henry Ford

      “Believe you can and you’re halfway there” – Theodore Roosevelt

      “The best way to predict your future is to create it” – Abraham Lincoln

      #Haiku: Recovery = Rebirth

      Mulligan –

      Rare gift;

      A “do-over”

      ‘Cause you DO know

      What you know now

    1. Becoming a Goddess – the Goddess Oracle by Alysse Aallyn

      Rainbow – Serendipity

        You Were Born Lucky!  You have to be lucky to deserve goddess-hood. It’s not for everybody. What is the greatest piece of good luck you’ve ever had? Your parentage? Talents? Home town? Best friend? A piece of advice? A special teacher? Think about it. Have you ever been offered a piece of good luck you couldn’t take advantage of, but wish you had?

        How Lucky Do You Need to Be? Ever seen the faces of gamblers seated hour by hour at the slot machines, wearing special gloves so their skin doesn’t fall off? Seriously, who would want to be them? Is it luck itself that we give thanks for, or our ability to recognize good fortune? Perhaps goddesses should give thanks for our innate ability to take advantage of a piece of good luck when we’re offered one. All these memories have one thing in common- i.e. “ability”, which is not luck, which is YOU. Give thanks for these abilities. Being a goddess is a glorious privilege. Let’s learn to develop gratitude thinking.

        Goddess Challenge – A different way of thinking about fortune is not all the wonderful things that didn’t happen, but the terrible things that COULD have happened – and didn’t. In other words, let’s try adopting a “glass half full” perspective and see how far that gets us.

        Goddess Danger – Now that you’re committed to the goddess path, the danger is always the same – recognizing your power but somehow being tricked into giving control of it over to some other entity that almost certainly doesn’t have your best interests at heart. We’re usually not even aware we’re doing this. But when you want to “be lucky” what does that mean? In whose eyes? Let’s put ourselves firmly in the driver’s seat and take a look at the path ahead of us. Do we want to go there? Do we really trust these people? Or are we the dog throwing away a real bone to reach the illusory bone we see pictured in the watery reflection of Aesop’s Fable?

        Goddess Opportunity – As we negotiate our mortal existence we have a unique chance to take advantage of serendipitous appearances and encounters. If we recognize it. Compare your path to the immortal framework of eternity and ask, How am I doing?

        How Did We Get Here? Turns out your Goddess Map is only a suggestion, full of surprises to keep things interesting. We are mapping as we go along. However, life is even more exciting, it turns out, than our imaginations.

        After the Storm – Comes the Rainbow! Every visible color – carefully separated out – forming an arch to give us a glimpse of heaven! If it didn’t provably exist, would we still believe in it?

        List Your Rainbows – Clouds may or may not have silver linings. Rainbows are a complete surprise – unconnected to the storms that spawned them. Write about the surprises in your life in your Goddess Journal. How many were nasty? How many joyous?

        The Universe Conspired – To bring you to this moment. You zigged, you zagged, you wound up here. Give thanks!

        Models & Mentors – “Serendipity is when you find things that you weren’t looking for because what you are looking for is so damned difficult”

        – Erin McKean

        “Steer Into the skid” – Alysse Aallyn

        “Here you are moving ahead bravely in spite of everything going wrong” – Rithvik Singh

        “Take advantage of happy accidents” – Vincent van Gogh

        “There are no coincidences” – Sigmund Freud

        #Haiku: Rainbow – Serendipity

        Happenstance –

        Fortuitous

        Chance; we’re

        Born lucky

        We just don’t know it.

      1. Becoming a Goddess – fulfilling the Goddess Oracle by Alysse Aallyn

        Peace – Serenity

          Do Goddesses get time off?  They need it!  Are your reveries organized around beaches, vacations, relaxation, memories of happy times when you had nothing to do but enjoy yourself feeling only the moment? Goddesses have a heavier lift! We have to live in four time frames at once – past, present, future AND possible!

          Is Peace Possible? Consider Serenity as an Idea, and an Ideal. Most of us are familiar with the “serenity prayer” written by theologian Reinhold Niebuhr:

          “God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference, living one day at a time; enjoying one moment at a time; taking this world as it is and not as I would have it; trusting that You will make all things right.“

          The Serenity Prayer works as an inoculation against pointless worry, which it sees as “borrowing trouble.” The benefit of cultivating serenity is that it allows tender shoots to grow and broken limbs – and organs – to mend.

          Goddess Challenge – Like meditation, serenity is a mental gymnastic that takes practice. Make a list of your most pressing concerns. Can you do anything about any of them today? If so, appoint a time when you will take a step towards resolving this concern. If you can’t do anything about it, put it forcefully out of your mind. Goddesses aren’t in charge of the universe! We are merely an upgrade in toughness and heroics. Imagine your worries as a bunch of balloons. Now let them go, one by one. Put each useless worry on a piece of paper and burn them slowly, one by one.

          Goddess Mantra – Give yourself a “serenity mantra” a word or phrase you find comforting and centering, and repeat it out loud to yourself. St. Julian of Norwich recommended: ”All will be well”, Coué offered, “Every day, in every way I am getting better and better”, some yoga enthusiasts chant a simple “Om.” You can use a phrase from your own past said to you by a Beloved Person – “now you’ll be fine” “You’re safe” “You’re perfect” “Everything’s all right” or the tried and true: “I love you.” My favorite is from the Book of Revelation: “Every tear is wiped away.”

          Goddess Danger – Don’t be tempted to become a mentor while you’re still learning. Goddesses usually want to be helpful but this can be a snare. Mentoring is an end-of-life honor, but you are still placing the oxygen mask on your own face so that you can stay on your plan. Not everyone has the steel to graduate to Goddess. You’re welcome to show friends the basics but don’t bother to walk them through it. You’re nobody’s nanny. You’re busy.

          FOMO – We are all worried about “missing” something. Often that “centering person”, that reassuring person from our past is not just the one who gave us the relaxation code, but is also the same one who told us what to worry about: ie. ”Make sure all the locks are locked” “Have you done your homework?” There certainly are things to be concerned about (“Are you registered to vote?”) but there are plenty of worries we CAN’T address. Return to the serenity prayer and start weeding out – on paper – your Justifiable Concerns. One of the best things about Anxiety – and I mean this – is that it offers an opportunity to ask for help. Yes, I say “opportunity”! Because – remember The Lovers -life is all about RELATIONSHIPS.

          Worries offer Opportunities to Forge More Meaningful, Worthwhile Relationships. Get ready to experiment. In every relationship in your life, your requirements, tolerance, communication goals will present as unique. Many people yearn to speak to a “professional” – therapist or life coach – and plenty of professionals out there are auditioning for a little – or a lot – of your hard-earned cash. An excellent place to start is with Proven Gurus like Tolle Eckhart or Pema Chodron who can be accessed for free from any library. See what you think. Evaluate their assistance. Inquire further.

          Goddess Know What They Have to Do – Others will be envious that we have laid out a plan for our lives, as well as that it is flexible, that it is life-enhancing and that it gives us permission to Enjoy. Be humble and unsurprised about this jealousy.

          You’re Entitled – Others also could find peace if they began to take control of the drama that rages within them. Point them in a hopeful direction but don’t get sucked in.

          Meditation Looks Like Dreaming – The truth is just what they suspect: that there is enormous pleasure in being a goddess. You will finally feel confident, and when you know your own strength, and the value of your time, you understand your own value. This is what others yearn for. They can learn it, too. But in the mean time you are enjoying your hard-fought-for serenity.

          We Need So Little To Be Happy – Here is the great realization. Do goddesses require entourages or enablers and sycophants, vast bank accounts, and acres of product and showcase? Or is one bowl, one mat, one dawn enough for us when we are fueled by our own power?  Allow yourself to revel in the comfort of another’s presence or the private pleasures of your own thoughts and company. There will be the joy of another morning, the peace of another night’s rest. The confidence of maintaining a sharp, clear head. Welcome to the Universe.

          Models & Mentors – “Do not let the behavior of others destroy your inner peace.” – The Dalai Lama

          “God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can and the wisdom to know the difference.” – Reinhold Niebuhr

          “Serenity of spirit and turbulence of action make up the sum of life”

          – Vita Sackville-West

          “Enjoy the peace of nature and declutter your inner world” – Amit Ray

          #Haiku: Peace – Serenity

          Melting heart;

          Compassion

          Purges

          Life’s shudders

          Restores

          Unruffled Depth

        1. Becoming a Goddess – accessing your immortality by Alysse Aallyn

          Inspiration – Intuition

            How Do You Gather Your Power? You need to find a way to hang on to those little ideas that keep flickering across your mind-screen. What inspires you? Are you waking up filled with exciting ideas you long to write down?  Do you feel the potential of philosophical, profound revelations in your dreams which can never be captured in your waking state?

            Your Subconscious is Calling Out to You – You are experiencing a split between your Rational self and your Prophetic Self, a split which is not only potentially destructive but completely unnecessary. Probably someone in your education blocked your inspiration by demeaning this interactive channel to the Collective Unconscious of Past and Future and warned you to ignore it. Often teachers think they are “protecting” us by pretending ignorance of the importance of intergenerational trauma, denying the importance of collective wisdom and its symbols. Education is a good thing when it teaches you to recognize, master and increase resources but it is certainly a bad thing if it countermands, neglects or destroys the yearning inside of you for a deeper connection to all the history of humanity.

            Goddess Challenge – We can re-open this channel, but we will have to think about its potential in a more positive way. The great physicist said that all profound truths contain their opposite (i.e. are not dichotomous) and so linguistically require new theories about the Real and the Unreal. These ideas are not mutually exclusive. We must learn to flow with them, rather than fear them & block their bubblings of power.

            Goddess Danger – “Either/Or” thinking is destructive because it requires we abandon vast methodologies of knowing. “Reductionism” reduces the world to “things” on the presumption that people are transient and “things” are more permanent. But if the magic of the universe encodes in relationships rather than objects then this reductionism kills true discovery & thought itself.

            Goddess Opportunity – Accept and ready yourself to explore your inspirations. Learn to separate them from fears and wishes. Cultivate your intuition, that precious gut instinct that warns us who and what to trust and who – and what – to back away from. Accept that – like all good things, this is a Process – and thus endless (ie; to be enjoyed for all eternity.) Accept that it is a skill to be honed – one you will keep forever.

            Goddess’ Gut – You sense things. After you sleep on it, you know things. Develop these instincts through drumming, foot massage, chanting, meditation, whatever activities bring you “out” of your head.

            Confront Your Real Self – You can use a sauna as your own private ‘sweat lodge.” The goal is to locate your original self to ask its opinion.

            All too often people in our consumer culture seek a psycho-active product for brain “transformation”. You will need brain “purifying” instead. Consider the substances you fear being without. Caffeine? Nicotine? Carbohydrates? Alcohol? Pain pills? Consider trying to go without for short periods of time to develop your tolerance. Try intermittent fasting under the guidance of a responsible nutrition coach. Track your emerging thoughts in your Training Journal.

            Models & Mentors – “Intuition is the whisper of the soul” – Krishnamurti

            “A good artist lets intuition lead him wherever it wants” – Lao Tzu

            “Follow your instincts – it’s where true wisdom manifests itself” – Oprah Winfrey

            “Intuition and observation are the sources for our knowledge” – Rudolf Steiner

            #Haiku: Inspiration – Intuition

            Faint voice

            Clear

            Harder you listen

            Heart

            Symphonics – re –

            Connecting

            World