Assess your potential to connect. We wake alone, but we are on the path of Attachment. Ask yourself; do you seek balanced, indestructible attachment, synchronous, not disharmonic relationship; a connection that is symbiotic, not exploitative. If the answer is Yes, you are on the path of Paradise.
How can we achieve these goals? First, we must understand and accept our Self, our Ego, with all its quirks and flaws, needs and yearnings, limits and possibilities. Then we must understand the Other; the Lover. We must attune ourselves to the structure of their yearning to begin to construct our duet, our dance. After that we must negotiate the rapids of relationship with each other and with the outside world. Danger! Excitement! Ecstasy! Despair…Compassion. Union.
We are caterpillars, you and I, attempting to learn the language of butterflies. We are unprepossessing creatures, daily absorbed in infantile needs of eating and excreting, but we have a firm promise of a future in which we stretch our gorgeous wings.
The Soul – Do you dream of hummingbirds? The impossible flight of the bumblebee? According to C.S. Lewis, we are not a Body with a Soul, we are a Soul with a Body. Our body may be very mutable, but our soul can be immortal. Do you dream of past lives? See yourself in historical contexts? Do you ever have dreams of utter bodilessness where you are totally free, seeming to travel invisibly through the power of your mind?
Accept Your Immortality – Can we destroy our own immortality through abuse and disbelief? Some of us would like to! Many people fearfully, officiously, vocally, and publicly, refuse this gift. But even if heaven and hell are choices some continuation of our will and our energy will continue. If we fight against this, it’s as tragic as battling against one of our talents (“I’m never going near that guitar.”) Think: Who are you harming? The direction we need to travel is in making our own company a reliable, eternal pleasure.
Challenge – What if our mind changes inevitably – just the way our body does? Think about the differences between you, all grown up, and you at say, three years old. Imagine the joyous understanding with which you finally “get” the previously incomprehensible. If you just accept that future possibility, you can enjoy future understanding now. List in your Dream Journal the incomprehensible things you would like to understand NOW.
Dangers – Christians locate the misery of non-progress in “sin”. Buddhists call it “clinging”. We grab on to any passing thing to stay our flight but of course it doesn’t work! The G forces start building up, creating a suction around us, meanwhile we are clinging to some crappy object, or some person who’s on an inevitably different trajectory. Relax. Let those things go. Don’t be frightened by your feelings, just study them, turn them imaginatively into huge iridescent bubbles, and “blow” them out. Enjoy the flight.
Opportunity – Think about one of the parables, in which everyone is invited to a glorious feast. People are so threatened by this, they not only don’t attend, they murder the messenger. Watch the glorious film, Groundhog Day. Poor weather forecaster Bill Murray is sentenced to living the same things over and over and over again, trying everything to get out of these repeats, including suicide. Finally he decides to learn how to simply just enjoy himself, while being as nice as possible to the other frightened, enraged, confused souls around him. Only then is he able to move on to the next level – which turns out to be the rewarding, much-desired love of his dreams.
Models & Mentors – “the living soul, once conscious of its power, cannot be quelled” – Horace Mann
“The soul always knows what to do to heal itself. The challenge is to silence the mind.” – Carolyne Myss
“Without applied awareness of the soul, happiness can’t arise”
– Dada Bhagwan
“The desire to know your own soul ends all other desires” – Rumi
Mantra – “Love is forever”
Meditation –
#Haiku: Last Minute
Bone grows Mind crashed Soul merge Skin graft Intervention – Light shaft Angel…? Laughed.
Soulmates – Do you dream of a lost twin? Do you look in the mirror and see someone else? Do you ever view another across a crowded room, touch their hand, and feel a strange galvanic charge? Do you think soulmates are possible? Is there only one or are soulmates developed? Are you disenchanted with sex? Do you have sex dreams that are more like night terrors? Does sex make you feel increasingly worthless and untouchable?
Soulmates Are Real And You Have One – It’s never too late. You are never so “lost” you can’t find your soulmate. The problem is, your soulmate feels just the way you do and you are frightened by that. You want your soulmate to rescue you, but you have to rescue each other. This takes a lot of bravery, a lot of humility, much insight and a little magic.
Challenge – There are plenty of frogs out there and some vipers, and we have kissed each. Possibly more than once. It’s also possible that we have “rewired” our system – through porn, games, and casual sex – so that it actually prevents us from finding a soulmate and forging a life bond. This is why starting as friends is so critical. It gets your defenses down to the point where yo can talk about fears, desires and problematic reactions. You can go slowly, make mistakes and be prepared to learn.
Danger – Sometimes – let’s face it – most times, you and your soulmate are “sick.” You have “caught” an infection from a society that says “fuck you” to eternal, mystical, mutual sexual union. That makes things hard. You don’t get “well” overnight. You need to practice good mental, emotional, physical, spiritual and sexual hygiene and you both have to figure out what that is. You both need to make the map of mutuality – in each other’s minds and bodies – for yourself. If the other person refuses to get “well” you must get away from them. The most important part of soulmating is this mutual pledge for health and growth – for both of you.
Opportunity – My book, I’ll Sleep When You’re Dead – is about the supernatural powers of soulmates. It’s about what to do when you dislike your soulmate at first. It’s about what to do when you and your soulmate both have horrific pasts and are pursued by actual demons. I can’t say it clearer than that. Don’t be frightened. Your bond is eternal, across time, geography and multiverses. Take it slow. You have all the time in the world.
Models & Mentors – “A soulmate’s purpose is to shake you up, tear apart your ego, show you your obstacles and addictions, break your heart open so new light can get in, make you so desperate and out of control that you have to transform your life and then introduce you to your spiritual master” – Elizabeth Gilbert
“A soulmate is the one person whose love is powerful enough to motivate you to meet your soul to do the emotional work of self-discovery and awakening” – Kenny Loggins
“They fought all the time and challenged each other every day. They were crazy about each other” – Nicholas Sparks
“I know what love is, because of you.” – Herman Hesse
Mantra – “I am yours as you are mine”
Meditation –
#Haiku: I’ll Sleep When You’re Dead
Only soulmates can Slay each other’s dragons Says Tibetan Master
Ambisextrous – Do you dream of being the “opposite” sex? IS there an opposite sex? Are these threatening dreams or pleasurable ones? Do you dream of the fetish trophies of gender; makeup, wigs, shoes, sports equipment? Do you have frequent “freedom” dreams: flying, swimming? Wake up damp, pulses pounding? Sometimes we want to be our own romantic partner, the subject of a lifelong pursuit. This is nothing but the honorable, deep desire to truly know oneself, to master our selfhood before we leave the planet. C.S. Lewis says we are not a body with a soul, we are a Soul with a body.
Remember – In the Dream, you are everyone. In dreams we confront ourselves, we challenge ourselves, we evolve ourselves. Write in your Dream Journal what it would be like to be your own opposite, your own Desire.
Challenge – Woody Allen says bisexuality doubles your chances to get a date on Saturday night. Anything wrong with that? Nobody should force themselves to perform sexually; it is important at all times to move as slowly as you feel comfortable with. The sexual revolution was a lot of fun, but it was spoiled for many people by a witless prejudice against “hang-ups.” Revulsion and doubt tell us plenty. We are on this earth to hone our “gut” instinct as well as our sensitivities. Gavin de Becker, danger specialist, reminds us that fear is a “gift.” Honor it.
Danger – Most “bad sex” stories when one sex disappoints or violates the other, start with substance abuse, undertaken with a nervous desire to get into a more relaxed or even transcendental state. All it actually does is skip over the “informed consent” part that is such an important feature of identity and will. Predators with a need for speed drug their prey! Afterwards the complex feelings of violation an shame take a life time to deal with. These facts mean we need to study trust before we study sex. What is trust? Safety? Honor? Let’s work on those issues while we develop a free space to evolve, experiment and grow.
Opportunity – Fresh interpretations of gender make this a glorious time to be alive. I can recall when gender was a prison sentence! Now it is an invitation to live more fully, to experience oneself and others more richly, to participate in that fruitful life of which we all dream.
Mantra – “I become”
Models & Mentors – “The great gift of human beings is we all have empathy. We can sense a mysterious connection to each other” – Meryl Streep
“Leadership is about empathy. It is about relating to people for the purpose of inspiring and empowering their lives” – Oprah Winfrey
“The capacity for empathy leads to a genuine encounter I which heart speaks to heart” – Pope Francis
“I believe empathy is the most essential quality of civilization” – Roger Ebert
“Empathy has no script…there is no right way or wrong way…there is only listening, emotionally connecting, communicating the incredibly healing message ‘You’re not alone” – Brene Brown
Meditation –
#Haiku – Ambisextrous
Ambisexuality: Joyously roused; By beauty Everywhere
Marriage – Partnership – Dreaming about weddings? Love, proposals, marriage? About The One that got Away? Dreaming about partnership enterprises in general – video gaming, tennis – where an Ideal Partner/Helper’s got your back? It’s very difficult to make it through life without a partner. We’ve got friends who come and go, sometimes special ones, but they’ve got obligations of their own. What if we had a Perfect Friend who made our Best Life their priority? What if we were not only willing to do the same for them but to promise this in public?
Everybody Deserves Somebody – We come into adulthood with strong memories of familial dependence. We are all attracted to caretaking behaviors and easily seduced by promises to read our minds and give us what we really want – (even if we don’t know what it is ourselves.) Then we discover Desire. Not only for bodies, but for Persons, Lives, Individualities. Other people are a spice, other people are a medicine for everything our lives appear to be lacking. What if we could combine all our needs together in one appetizing package?
Challenge – We rarely ask our friends to change their lives for us. They are VERY rarely willing to do so. But a partner is someone to actively plan a life with. You get to talk through all the Wants, the Possibles, the Fears. Heady stuff! The challenge is to know Yourself well enough to make any sort of honest statements about who you are, who you CAN be and who you want to be.
Danger – A substantial number of partnerships fail. We all know this but we keep trying. Then there are the partnerships that evolve into Something Else, a Financial, Real Estate or Caregiving unit that is very necessary but also pretty far from what we originally had in mind. Our challenge is – can we know and be known? Can we evolve with another soul to a higher plane? Can we find our Soulmate? Does such a creature exist? Disappointment and betrayal are all too often the outcomes.
Opportunity – Soulmates DO exist! And they DO evolve. We WILL change our lives for each other and they will change, blend, merge with us. Any interaction with another requires communication, boundaries, honesty, planning and “rules”. I put rules in quotes because a good partner keeps “transforming” the game and we keep transforming ourselves to meet it. The best way to honestly know yourself is to keep conscious, subconscious and unconscious in alignment. Purposeful dreaming – questioning the subconscious, confronting the unconscious and learning from the collective unconscious – is the best way to do that!
Models & Mentors – “It’s not lack of love but lack of friendship that makes for unhappy marriages” – Friedrich Nietzsche
“What counts in making a happy marriage is not compatibility but how you deal with incompatibility” – Leo Tolstoy
“A happy marriage is a long conversation which always seems too short” – Andre Maurois
“The secret of a happy marriage is finding the right person. You know they’re the right person if you want to be with them all the time” – Julia Child
Mantra – “I love”
Meditation –
#Haiku: Marriage
Alone we perish Jointly immortal Heaven is Joy maximized
Are Goddesses Alone on Their Pinnacles?– No! Evolving your inner Goddess is discovering how to manifest and elevate your God-given attributes to timelessness. Once you have uncovered the powers of your real self, you will also see what you have been lacking and will feel the force of the natural mandate; “Go forth and be fruitful.” Being alone is a perfectly acceptable choice, but so is coupling – forever or briefly. Not only children are a couple’s progeny but ideas, achievements, duets.
Dreaming about weddings? Or just sex? How about romance, proposals, marriage? Ever fantasize about The One that got Away? Or do you just dream about partnership enterprises in general – gaming, sports – where an Ideal Partner/Helper’s got your back? It’s definitely more difficult to make it through life without a partner, and there are plenty of signs that successful partnership is very rewarding. Sure, we’ve got friends who come and go, sometimes special ones, but they’ve got obligations of their own. What if we had a Perfect Friend who made our Best Life their priority? What if we were not only willing to do the same for them but to promise this in public? Consider your ideal partnership contract.
Everybody Deserves Love – We come into adulthood with strong memories of familial dependence. We are all attracted to caretaking behaviors and easily seduced by promises to read our minds and give us what we really want, even if we haven’t figured that out for ourselves. Then our hormones click in and we discover Desire. Not only for bodies, but for Persons, Lives, Individualities. Other people are a spice, other people are a medicine, other people are a distraction – everything our lives appear to be lacking. What if we could combine all these needs together in one appetizing human package?
Goddess Challenge – We rarely ask our friends to change their lives for us. They are VERY rarely willing to do so. But a partner is someone to actively plan a life with. You get to talk through all the Wants, the Possibilities, the Fears. Heady stuff! The challenge is to know Yourself well enough to make any sort of honest statements about who you are, who you CAN be and who you want to be.
Allies Need a Long-Term Contract – Lives are uprooted. Possessions are shared. Long term strategy results in map-merging to create a new – but more exciting – map. If you’re a giver, learn your limits. Because takers don’t have any.
Someone Needs to Take Your Back – What if, as the great mystic Emmanuel Swedenborg suggested, each one of us is only half an angel. You need someone to cover the things you can’t cover. And if you were planning to start a goddess family, you need more than a partner, you need a spouse.
Spouses Teach Honesty – The person who knows you best doesn’t put up with a false front. You literally force each other to get to the root of emotions and behaviors that will open up your psyches not just to each other, but to yourselves. The spouse who falls in love with you and forgives you finally allows you to fall in love with and forgive yourself.
Staging, Experimental Life Lab and Boot Camp – We get to try out our ideas on each other. The Beloved Other is a Mirror and a Coach. The purpose of existence, the purpose of YOUR existence – suddenly becomes clear.
Goddess Danger – A substantial number of partnerships fail even at their short-term purpose. We all know this but we keep trying. Then there are the partnerships that evolve into Something Else, a Financial, Real Estate or Caregiving unit that is very necessary but also pretty far from what we had in mind originally. Our challenge remains the same. Is it possible to both know and be known? Can we find our Soulmate? Does such a creature exist? Is it possible to evolve with another soul to a higher plane of SuperSoul? Disappointment and betrayal are all too often the apparent outcomes.
Goddess Opportunity – Soulmates DO exist! They DO evolve together. It’s possible to change life for another while they change, blend, merge with us. Any interaction with another requires communication, boundary testing, honesty, planning and “rules”. I put rules in quotes because a good partner keeps “transforming” the game and we keep transforming ourselves to meet it. The best way ever to honestly know yourself is to keep your conscious, subconscious and unconscious in alignment. Purposeful journaling is the best way to achieve that goal!
Models & Mentors – “It’s not lack of love but lack of friendship that makes for unhappy marriages” – Friedrich Nietzsche
“What counts in making a happy marriage is not compatibility but how you deal with incompatibility” – Leo Tolstoy
“A happy marriage is a long conversation which always seems too short”
– Andre Maurois
“The secret of a happy marriage is finding the right person. You know they’re the right person if you want to be with them all the time” – Julia Child
Check your friend list. Do you dream of love, sex, connection? Hand-holding, hugging, family celebrations? We were all born to search for Alliances. An alliance is symbiotic, good for both sides of the equation. To reach out, you must each decide your motive (“I Could Use a Friend”). Approach with the CERTAINTY that you are WORTHY of friendship. This last one is tricky because we are all looking for validation. This is the source of many “imposter” dreams where we find ourselves naked in front of the entire class, unprepared on Test Day!
Goddesses Need Respect – A Goddess is a Soul Apart. You have a mission, and the Other must be worthy of you. You must be able to respect them, too. You can see that dominance/submission becomes a zero-sum game with each trying to knuckle the other under. No relationship can last under that stress and it degenerates into a destructive spiral.
Goddesses Have Mystery – You are aware of vast reaches of your Self that are unknown and In Development. Most of your promises are tenuous. You are stepping forward with hope into uncharted and potentially dangerous wilderness. This means the pair must accept each other in good faith, as followers of the Light. You will rapidly see you cannot forge relationships until you have a working concept of what the Light is and what its potentialities are. Too many aspirants want the Lover to define them when our obligation is to define ourselves. Accept that with a mystery this vast, it can’t be “solved”. It can only be momentarily elucidated as we receive glimpses of our path and purpose.
Good Relationships are Complementary – You don’t have to provide everything, and they don’t either. Each of you has lapses and blindness the other can improve.
You Are a Giver and Worthy of Help – We can’t get through this alone, and we don’t want to. Luckily, we are surrounded by other humans, struggling, just like us. If we pledge to help each other, we can dispatch terror and celebrate joy! Comforting! But how can we tell the difference between Builders and Exploiters? We don’t want to end up as someone else’s meal.
Goddess Danger – When someone is trying to mangle your self-esteem, recognize this. Even if it comes in the guise of “friendship” this person is an enemy. This is not what friends are for. When someone is trying to “capture” you, i.e. limit and control your possibilities and behavior, that person is a hostage-taker looking for slaves. NOT a friend.
Goddess Challenge – How to recognize friends? Friends are honest: “I just don’t like that dress but maybe it’s me.” Friends are forgiving, ‘I’m sorry, I was having a bad day. I know you’re sorry, too.” Friends are fun, “Let’s cheer ourselves up.” Friends are helpful: “Let’s figure a way out of this.” Are you honest, forgiving, fun-loving and helpful? You’re ready to be a friend. Friendship is a good place to start. Be the friend you want to have – warm, funny, loyal, truthful.
Love Enriches – It Does Not Deplete – – Friends are a mirror in which we see ourselves. We can experiment with possibilities, we can expand our reach. Our intelligence is doubled, as well as our efforts. Our sorrows are halved and our ideas are increased exponentially. Reach out! You never know until you try. And there’s always the possibility of Love and deepening sexual connection.
Love Transforms as a Goddess Transforms – Things you thought you could not do seem possible now because someone believes in you. Believe in yourself because they do, and honor them by believing in them, in return.
Locked Back to Back the Goddess Pair Sees Everything – Gaze turns outward at the world, not inward on each other. Are you chewing or strengthening? Learn the steps of your tango. Add new steps of your own.
As You Change, the Couple Changes – Compare Training Journals. Are you evolving? Can you evolve together? Is it safe to speak the truth? Does one partner try to dominate? Does one partner use infantile behaviors to get “their way”? There is no “one way.” As joint goddess, the couple has goals also. Compare. Allow differences. The truth will be revealed.
Models & Mentors – “You are my sun, my moon and all my stars”
– e.e. cummings
“All that we love deeply becomes a part of us” – Helen Keller
“Love makes your soul crawl out of its hiding place”– Zora Neale Hurston
“Love is not proud or boastful, keeps no record of past mistakes – love rejoices in the truth” –
II Corinthians
“Laugh as much as you breathe, love as long as you live” – Rumi
(Ordinary dorm room with desk lights, two twin beds, built ins. JAZZ feels her body as if to reassure herself that it’s still there. CORSO – bare-chested –is sitting on one of the beds, studying a laptop)
CORSO
Lose something?
JAZZ
I lost everything. What are you doing here?
CORSO
Installing fun software. You seem distraught– your mood begs improvement. Come over here into the light and let me look at you.
JAZZ
I’m not distraught, I’m disgusted. Hey, that’s my laptop.
CORSO
Nothing human disgusts. Take it from me, you’re going to love your new social media interface.
JAZZ
The thing that disgusted me wasn’t human. Is your software a game?
CORSO
Everything worth doing devolves into game. As your administrator, I’m in charge of upgrades. We’ll do Mr. Quinn next. Any idea where he’s been hiding?
JAZZ
Stevie Farrell, din’t you mean? How did you get in here?
CORSO
I’m loco parentis, poor, suspicious little Jazz, just checking up. You’ve been keeping such bad company. And Stevie’s not the worst of it – there’s a prowler around campus who seems to have it in for you. Let’s hope it’s not too late to put your feet on a better course.
JAZZ
I’m leaving if you’re not.
CORSO
Poor Jazz, what can we do to mitigate these fears?
JAZZ
(Throws herself impulsively on the other bed)
I’m not afraid of you.
CORSO
I see we have much work ahead.
JAZZ
(She finds his shirt – reacts like it’s infectious and throws it at him)
Why can’t you keep your clothes on?
CORSO
(Catching the shirt effortlessly)
Stevie and I were very informal; I was hoping we could be informal too. I gather he confessed his proclivities to you?
JAZZ
I heard a lot about how you can’t be trusted.
CORSO
Credulous Jazz! We must teach you discernment. Education is challenge, not safety or comfort – I strengthen minds and bodies to appreciate, manipulate and surmount reality. Recreate your own world. If you don’t want those things, then you’re fodder like the rest of them.
(fans himself with the shirt)
These rooms are very hot. Do you know the trick to opening these windows? Aren’t you feeling overdressed?
JAZZ
I saw your game.
CORSO
I borrowed bodies that weren’t being used! And aren’t you the better for it? Restful sleep, interesting dreams, AND a paycheck, now there’s a deal. I’ll throw in little Stevie to be your guide.
JAZZ
How can we converse when you pervert language? You pervert language and ideas. You pervert bodies.
CORSO
Debate’s not your forte, Jazz. I can assist with that. You entered this room requesting an upgrade in your selective amnesia. It’s something we all must have, otherwise none of us could function. I can help you control it.
JAZZ
If it comes from you, I don’t want it.
CORSO
Poor little Jazz! Who could you be channeling – me or him? Or perhaps it’s that desperado asking everyone for scuttlebutt?
JAZZ
I went with the flow till the flow tried to drown me. I’m becoming my own person.
CORSO
All freshmen think that. Is the real Jazz so robotic? You used to be so much more fun. You were quite the adventurer.
(laughs)
Let’s laugh together. Why so serious?
(mimes a ridiculously pulled down clown face)
Life unlocks all its secret pleasures once you master the key.
CHASE
(Bursts into the room)
Is the key murder? Soul murder, followed by physical murder to make sure the souls stay dead?
(JAZZ vaults to her feet, they hug, obviously drawing strength from one another)
CHASE
Stand up, you bastard.
CORSO
Oh, can the paranoia, little Steve. Victimology is so limiting. Jazz and I aren’tinvolved, if that’s what’s bothering you. We share a strictly business relationship. There’s room for you, too if you down your tools of self-destruction.
(Rises imposingly. He’s bigger thanCHASE)
CHASE
We have all the proof we need. You can’t get away with it.
JAZZ
The bodies are piling up.
CORSO
But they long to pile, and not feel guilty! Everyone wants to be a porn star!
CHASE
We know what you did.
CORSO
What a shame, then, that you felt the need to mime unconsciousness. When will feel your feelings and live your truth? Isn’t that what youth is all about?
JAZZ
Being drugged isn’t truth!
CORSO
Yet you – both of you – acceded to all of it. Names along the bottom line. The law says you’re adults.
JAZZ
I know what you did is illegal!
CORSO
Fashion to law, little Jazz, and with such startling speed! Too bad the law is amorphous, the law’s in transition, it’s a creature of fashion just as you were. Things that were illegal last year are perfectly legal today. People go to court and bankrupt themselves to “win” – ask your sad friend – but the law doesn’t help them feel they have won. They spend the rest of their lives trying to recapture the glow of surrender.
CHASE
You are vile and despicable – everything about you is saturated with evil.
CORSO
I see that you two have made loserdom your bond. It’s so unhealthy, all this focus on the past. You could enjoy both youth and wealth, but you consciously choose misery. Let’s try ratiocination for a change. Who gives benefits and who gives problems? Haven’t I made all your tiny dreams come true? You can have Mr. Quinn if you want him, Jazz, anyone can. Now let’s concentrate on upgrading these immature fantasies.
CHASE
What if we tell the Dean?
CORSO
Who, Bernie?I’m sure you’ll find Bernie doesn’t expect me to police my students’ very randy sex and dream lives.Bernie and I understand each other perfectly. People loveporn, everyone wants an avatar and to feel like a creator. Let’s consecrate all this blood and shit to transcendental purposes.
JAZZ
You use words you can’t understand.We’re soulmates. We’ve seen worlds of possibility, of universe and time.
CORSO
You’re welcome!
JAZZ
You’ll never know what we can do.
CORSO
Pretty sure I can guess. Everything except freedom?
CHASE
Your freedom is all fake. You’re nothing but an appetite. All youcreate are slaves.
CORSO
Oh. Slaves! In a limitlessuniverse, slaves are no fun at all. It’s such a bore always having to direct.
(fanning himself)
Jazz, how can you tolerate this hideous heat? I know there’s a trick to these windows.
(Successfully opens window)
Stevie, get us a drink. Let’s sit down and talk this over like grownups.
CHASE
Not a chance.
(BEXappears spot-lit on the TOWER LIFT, scanning with his binoculars, holding his shotgun at the ready. He sights his quarry & racks his slide)
JAZZ
Look out the window, Dr. Corso.
(She pulls CHASE away)
Tell me what you see.
CORSO
(Peering)
Who’s out there, Jazz? Bile stained, piss stained revenants skulking home for parietals?
(BEXclimbs awkwardly out on the tower lift, hooking his leg, trying to get a good shot)
CORSO
(Waves out at the world)
Run home, littleoneironauts! Your memory cards expired!
(JAZZ grabsCHASEand pulls him to the floor. Shots ring out.CORSO, looks down at his chest as red stains bloom across his back. Plummets slowly out through the window. Recoil causes BEXto lose his footing – drop his gun – throw his arms up – cry out – fall)
JAZZ
Set a demon to catch a demon!
CHASE
May the aspirations of murderers always overreach.
JAZZ
And those of lovers override.
CHASE
Time to free the others? Whether they like it or not?
JAZZ
Kiss me.
(They kiss.Sacred music, pink glitter.DARKNESS. FINAL CURTAIN)
SCENE XII – BATHTUB/DRESSING ROOM with towel & clothes rack. HUGE bathtub
CHASE
Here we are.
JAZZ
God, this is luxe. Now I’m scared of drowning.
CHASE
(Touches her)
I have a lifesaving badge.
JAZZ
Coming in with me?
CHASE
Soulmates should never be apart too long. In relationships timing is everything and we don’t want to miss a beat.
JAZZ
Right. We might end up in different universes. Who’s to say we’d ever get back?
(She turns on taps, sounds of water flowing – bubbles)
CHASE
You’re getting bubbles all over the floor.
JAZZ
Who cares? Your mother already hates me.
CHASE
(Reaches in to turn off the jets)
She absolutely does not. My mother’s not a hater. Look at this. There seems to be a drain in the floor.
JAZZ
Seems to be? Didn’t you live here?
CHASE
Nope. This house is new to me.
JAZZ
What a thoughtful vortex we’ve fallen into.
(They undress. CHASE has chain tats twisting up his arms)
JAZZ
I see you made your status permanent. What with the chains.
(Touches them)
CHASE
I’ve got commitment. How about you? Any tattoos?
JAZZ
A tiny one you’ll never find.
(Slides into bath)
CHASE
Sure you want me in there? What if I’m contagious?
JAZZ
Here’s hoping we both are.
(He climbs in)
CHASE
You like ithot. Just like my mom. She thinks you’re not clean unless you remove the top layer of skin.
(JAZZ dumps bubbles on his head – they play – she squeals – he upends her looking for the tattoo))
CHASE
Here it is! I found it! What’s that – a hummingbird? A butterfly?
JAZZ
(Spitting bubbles)
It’s a dragonfly.
(They play. Ah, love)
Weren’t we doing something important before we got worm-holed away?
(Seductively)
CHASE
Nothing as important as this.
(Kissing)
JAZZ
Now I recognize you without your skin.
CHASE
You’ve heard the theory angels are hermaphrodites?
JAZZ
I missed that one.
CHASE
You can be my other wing.
(ZOYA strikes a gong in the front hallway)
CHASE
Uh oh. There goes the dinner bell.
JAZZ
There’s a dinner bell?
CHASE
Mom needs an audience for her extravaganzas.
JAZZ
She cooks her own birthday dinner?
CHASE
From scratch. She’s a one-woman homemaking army. What does yourMom do for her birthday?
JAZZ
We go to one of those sneeze guard buffets where children throw meatballs. Intro to Plague Theory.
(They wrestle, squealing)
CHASE
This is the best bath I ever had. I’m looking forward to getting dirty just so we can get clean again.
JAZZ
I know! It’s so much more fun with two of us!
CHASE
No baths with the Bexter?
JAZZ
Are you kidding? I had to use reverse psychology just to get him to shave. Please – no more Old Boyfriend talk. Let’s agree when we get out of this bath we will be completely new.
(Embrace)
CHASE
Agreed.
(Magical moments. ZOYA strikes gong again)
CHASE
Uh oh. Thirty second warning.
(He climbs out, helps her into towel)
Time for Lady’s Choice.
(Rack of clothes in spot)
JAZZ
I can be anyone I want? There’s plenty to choose from.
(Handles clothes)
Your mother wasn’t kidding. Most of these still have tags. Is your sister even real?
CHASE
Sure she is. She got all the niceness, I got all the meanness .
JAZZ
How can she nice and miss Mom’s birthday?
CHASE
You’ll see why. How about this one?
(Prom dress)
JAZZ
No I like this one better.
(Girl Scout uniform)
CHASE
Or Pocahontas.
(Fringed Indian outfit)
JAZZ
Or a cheerleader! Maybe there’s a football uniform for you. I have my fantasies, too.
CHASE
Better keep it simple. We might have to make a break for it.
SCENE XI – FARRELL RESIDENCE. (ZOYA, festively dressed excitable little woman with dyed hair teeters forward on high heels)
ZOYA
Stevie!
(She clutches CHASE, kissing him everywhere)
Oh Stevie, Stevie, I was so afraid you wouldn’t come.
CHASE
Miss your birthday? How could I possibly? And I brought a friend.
(JAZZ wavesnervously)
JAZZ
(Awkwardly extending plant)
Happy Birthday.
(Painfully obvious this is way too big a plant for this tiny person)
ZOYA
(Making no move to take it)
Oh, my. That looks so…interesting. Well come in, come in.
( JAZZ unloads plant on hall table, looking around, awed. ZOYA regards plant apprehensively.)
ZOYA
I suppose I’m ancient, dry and prickly just like this plant. Does it come with directions?
JAZZ
It’s a Christmas cactus. It’s going to have three blooms. See?
ZOYA
(Without enthusiasm)
Lovely.
(Clings to CHASE)
It’s so wonderful to see you!
(She squeezes him)
Look how tall you’ve gotten.
CHASE
(hugs her)
Good to see you, Mom. You’re looking well.
JAZZ
Sorry I’m not dressed for a party.
CHASE
Jazz had kind of a disaster. Somebody jumped out of her dorm room window.
(JAZZand CHASEexchange looks)
ZOYA
How terrible! Were they badly hurt?
CHASE
(With relish)
Killed, Mom. Dead.
(His mother backs away, looking at the pair of them)
ZOYA
Do they give you an automatic A and send you home?
CHASE
Urban legend, Mom. You’ve got to stop believing myths.
(His mother strikes him lightly on the arm)
ZOYA
I never know when you’re teasing.
CHASE
If Jazz could borrow something of Cyanne’s…?
ZOYA
(Recollecting she’s the hostess)
Of course, of course. Cyanne has way too many clothes. She’s always shopping. You look about the same size. She’d say yes but she’s away at college. She’s pledging my sorority. Quick drink before you freshen up?
(An expression almost of panic)
Because I’ve got to get back – back to the kitchen.
(Backs away as if dragged – exit)
CHASE
My Mom always bakes her own birthday cake.
JAZZ
Why didn’t you tell me your mother hates plants?
(Gestures)
All these plants are fake.
CHASE
Mom says growth’s a lot of work.
JAZZ
(Mimes looking at family photos on the walls)
That you as a baby?
CHASE
The very same. Aren’t I adorable? You can’t tell which is me and which is Cyanne.
JAZZ
You all look so happy.
CHASE
Appearances can be deceiving.
JAZZ
So your real name’s Stevie.
CHASE
Steven. Now that you know it, forget it. Just another thing that’s gone.
JAZZ
You could have told me.
CHASE
Who knew we’d end up here? I’ve never been good at telling people things. The vortex assumed control.
Alysse Aallyn 