Alysse Aallyn

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  • #DreamTherapy – Dream Journaling with Alysse Aallyn

    Judgement – Do you dream of gossips, shunners, condemnation? Franz Kafka’s brilliant novels are about the feeling of being sentenced for unexplained crimes we didn’t intentionally commit with no way to defend ourselves.

    Do you dream of a great eye? Walls of eyes? We know other people are looking. We know we are being assessed, ranked, possibly dismissed. We defensively assess, dismiss and gossip about each other. It’s so hard to know what’s really going on when we are right in the middle of it. Do you dream of trials? Punishment? Hangovers?

    Cultivate Discernment – You notably have the right to judge for yourself, but you have the obligation. We are familiar with the experience of disliking some experience until a friend teaches us “how” to like it. We treasure the interesting adventure of seeing the world through another’s eyes , feeling with their hands, tasting with their tongue and remembering through their memory. An out of body experience for sure, as well as a bonding exercise. But always keep an eye out for “end results”? Is developing a taste for absinthe or designer drugs “good” for us? How does it benefit our bottom line to cultivate an enjoyment of “ghost cars”?

    Challenge – There is a saying that youth produces Bad Experiences and Bad Experiences develop Good Judgment. But you ought to be able to see some of these Bad Experiences coming because in our competitive capitalistic society these can be wipeout events. How many decades of your life can you devote to unethical corporations, scammy multi-level marketing schemes, bad marriages and “secret” investments? Our time, our youth, our energy and our assets are limited. Open your Dream Journal and sketch out your limits.

    Danger – Regret is a potent force. Sometimes it is possible to be too cautious. But can you just “dip a toe?” The principle of “dollar cost averaging” suggests that you keep “paying yourself back” for investments that offer the promise of paying off big, so that if they suddenly plunge, you will never have actually lost money. This requires that we not get swept up in the experience and maintain a mind unaffected by inebriating substances. Ask yourself honestly, is that possible for me?

    Opportunity – “If everyone else jumped, would you?” Now’s the time for you to develop yourself outside “the group.” How often do you do things because “the group” is doing them? How smart is your group? Who controls it? How close to the cliff ARE you? Think about the nature of leadership. Of models. Once you start evincing discernment you will be challenged but respected. Sometimes you lose your taste for the group, or you find a new group that suits you better. Evolve.

    Models & Mentors – “Good judgment comes from bad experience”

    – Will Rogers

    “At the end of the day, you need someone who listens to you without judgment” – Payal Rohatgi

    “A rush to judgment makes a fair trial hard to get”
    – John Grisham

    “When you judge another you define yourself” – Wayne Dyer

    ‘It is easy to dodge our responsibilities, but hard to dodge the consequences of dodging our responsibilities” – Josiah Stamp

    Mantra – “I judge”

    Meditation –

    #Haiku: After Magritte

    In the dream you play
    Every role –
    Perp, victim,
    Voyeur, Cleaner, Pimp
    Judge

  • #DreamTherapy – Dream Journaling with Alysse Aallyn

    Age – Wisdom – Dreaming of old people? Funerals? Yourself getting old? Dream of gurus on mountaintops, buddhas, palaces of wisdom? Or are you dreaming of a specific elder who had an influence – bad or good – on your young life?


    You Are Wiser Than You Know – Jung said- in the dream, you are everyone you dream about. This is a rather primitive expression of an obvious truth – you ”control”, “create” and hold the key to all these different people. You, alone, know exactly what their symbology represents. They are “shadows” of yourself. Jung called them “animas.” You summon them into being when you need them. DreamTherapy suggests you are yearning for insight, yearning for strength, desiring a map to explain the maze in which you find yourself. You contain the secrets of your own release.

    Challenge – in your Dream Journal, contrast elders you admire with those you avoid. Aren’t the latter complainers who stress to everyone they meet the bad hand life has dealt them? They complain about their health, politics, the weather, other people – whatever crosses the windscreen of their increasingly tiny minds. In their world the children never call, the doctors don’t help, the weather’s getting worse, the food is adulterated and we are all going to hell. There may be some truth to these claims but all we see is Ego. This person is clamoring ever more loudly for more ego strokes without apparently noticing the discomfort and distaste of those around them. Rather than trying a new strategy, they step up their whingeing. Read the room! Is what you want to scream at them but you realize they can no longer “learn.” This is the opposite of wisdom. This is senility. A brain is shutting down, a personality is beggared and no one wants to be around it.

    List in your Dream Journal the elders you admire. Nelson Mandela, Joe Biden, Desmond Tutu, The Dalai Lama, Deepak Chopra, Oprah Winfrey, Pema Chodron, the Pope? This person is Ego-Less. This is a person who talks about others, not themselves. They care for others. They discuss ideas rather than gossip and have a long memory of problems, solutions, trial and error. They keep themselves “young” in all the ways that matter. People flock to them.

    There’s an old Cherokee story about how each of us is born with a good wolf and a bad wolf inside of us. The one that gets stronger and takes control is the one you feed. Your challenge is to figure out how to practice wisdom every day. Accepting your dreams and encouraging their deepening understanding is the beginning of wisdom.

    Danger – The pursuit of gurus is inherently dangerous because there are a lot of con artists out there seeking hostages and slaves. Learn to avoid people who use:

    1. Projection – Subject is unwilling to see their own shortcomings and uses everything in their power to avoid being held accountable for them. Projection is a defense mechanism used to displace responsibility of one’s negative behaviors by attributing them to someone else. It acts as a digression that avoids ownership and accountability.
    2. Nonsensical conversations from hell – Word salad, circular conversations, ad hominem arguments, projection and gaslighting to disorient you and get you off track should you ever disagree with them or challenge them in any way.
    3. Blanket statements and generalizations –
    4. Misrepresenting your thoughts and feelings to the point of absurdity
    5. Nitpicking and moving the goal posts
    6. Changing the subject to evade accountability
    7. Covert and overt threats
    8. Name-calling – offensive labeling
    9. Destructive conditioning – Someone tries to condition you to associate your strengths, talents, and happy memories with abuse, frustration and disrespect. They do this by sneaking in covert and overt put-downs about idealized qualities and traits; sabotaging your goals, ruining celebrations, vacations and holidays. They may even isolate you from your friends and family and make you financially dependent upon them. Like Pavlov’s dogs, you’re essentially “trained” over time to become afraid of doing the very things that once made your life fulfilling.
    10. Smear campaigns and stalking
    11. Playing the Martyr
    12. Demands Immediate Unthinking Fealty – When someone stresses the fact that they are a “nice guy” or girl, that you should “trust them” right away or emphasizes their credibility without any provocation from you whatsoever, be wary.
    13. Baits and badgers you – Feigns innocence
    14. Boundary testing – You are not allowed to have boundaries or even triggers
    15. Aggressive jabs disguised as jokes
    16. Condescending sarcasm and patronizing tone
    17. Belittling and degrading – Shaming

    You can see this is all about Control. Avoid those who seek to control or dominate you. The Revered Elders mentioned above would not do that.

    Opportunity – You are being offered a chance to become a lighthouse to the world – resembling the people you admire. Don’t fear “age”, fear bitterness and self-seeking. Once you have advanced enough in your soul to feel compassion you will learn peace.

    Models & Mentors – “You can’t control the wind but you can learn to adjust your sails.” – Jimmy Dean

    “It always seems impossible till it’s done.” – Nelson Mandela

    “Knowledge speaks but wisdom listens” – Jimi Hendrix

    “I am thankful to those who said No. Because of them, I did it myself.”
    – Albert Einstein

    “Experience is not what happens to you, but what you do with what happens to you.” – Aldous Huxley

    “It is never too late to be who you might have been” – George Eliot

    ‘Wisdom is the journey no one can take for us” – Marcel Proust

    Mantra – “I understand”

    Meditation –

    #Haiku: Namaste

    Light
    Glows
    Within me
    Honoring
    The wisdom of
    The light
    Within you

  • #DreamTherapy – Dream Journaling with Alysse Aallyn

    Law – Do you dream of judges? Lawyers? Court? Are you obsessed with TV programs about justice? When justice is delayed or denied, do you obsess about that? Do you ever feel unjustly punished by life itself? Do you envy or rage against those who have “gotten away with something”?

    Our Desire for Justice is Hardwired – “Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness, for they shall be filled.” In my view, a concept of Complete Justice is heaven enough. Of course, we are repeatedly warned that it won’t match our earthly ideologies, that we are children scrapping in a sandbox who haven’t noticed, much less comprehended, the real issues.

    Challenge – What laws resonate with you? Do you believe in “karma”? How would you define it? What laws make you angry? Which laws would you modify? What is your attitude towards the police – protectors of order or agents of mayhem? Dick Nixon was famous for talking endlessly about “restoring law and order” until just before he was forced to resign for his crimes. Many Trump followers insist everything Trump has done is “justified because Democrats are worse.” Is this a race to the bottom? Where’s the off-ramp?

    Danger – Laws keep changing. We want them to change. How much does that bother you? “Judge not lest ye be judged” is a scary proposition. How would we come off if our standards were used against us? Come to think of it, what are our standards? Are they fluid? Flexible? Jesus also said the “letter” i.e. “written rule” KILLS. That it’s the “spirit that gives life.”

    Opportunity – Possibly your dreams are for “spirit-filled” Law. Maybe you wanted to go to Law School but life intervened. It’s never too late to study any subject that’s close to our heart. Sometimes all we wish for are heroes; I think that’s the sole reason for the wild popularity of the Marvel movie series. Do you admire heroes because they break the rules, or because they uphold them? You acknowledge that there must be rules, but you want them to be “spirit-filled”. In what areas of your life are you too rigid? In which are you too flexible? Imagine yourself speaking in court, making a case for yourself. What arguments would you give? Sketch them out in your Dream Journal. Ask your dreams to start imagining a Justice World. How would it look?

    Models & Mentors – “Law is not law if it violates the principles of eternal justice” – Lydia Maria Child

    “The only stable state is one where all are equal before the law” – Aristotle

    “Law is the public conscience” – Thomas Hobbes

    ‘Able in argument, accurate in analysis, strict in study, candid with clients and honest with adversaries, today I shall not, to win a point, lose my soul”

    – St. Thomas More

    “If we desire respect for the law, we must make law respectable” –

    Louis D. Brandeis

    Mantra – “I bend”

    Meditation –

    #Haiku: Karma

    Come round –
    Go round.
    Love reaps love
    Law reaps
    Justice
    Violence reaps
    Whirlwind.

  • #DreamTherapy – Dream Journaling with Alysse Aallyn

    Illusion – Are you captivated by dream world mirages? Do you find yourself dreaming about some magic dissolution of “the rules of reality”?
    The problem with mirages – especially those we long to believe in – is that they become illusions. We need to cling to an obvious fantasy so hard we willingly surrender our ability to discern fact from fiction.

    Illusions are Powerful – The seventeenth century Dutch needed a desirable luxury exchange item the privileged could trade back and forth for status reasons. Yes, that was the tulip bulb. It was a bubble – a scheme with a limited number of buyers – and inevitably the bottom fell out and left a whole lot of previously comfortable people bankrupt. We don’t have anything like that, these days, do we? Or do we?

    Challenge – Are you trapped by an illusion that you used to need but now is killing you? Open your Dream Journal and let’s consider. You can identify this by your increasing suffering over your increasingly difficult life and your diminishing pleasure over something that used to be a reliable joy. Is it as relationship? An activity? A belief? Look at the problem honestly. Find others going through the same experience and have an honest discussion about it. If any group member rushes in defensively to shame and discourage you, to convince you you’re not feeling what you KNOW you ARE then what you’re trying to exit is a cult. Stop communicating with those flying monkeys and find somebody who supports the truth of your actual suffering AND your desire to feel better.

    Danger – The path to re-making yourself is fraught with danger and you will require all sorts of help. Don’t be discouraged if your feelings are volatile and transitory and you are confused about their reality. Move slowly, consulting kind others with whom you feel safe.

    Opportunity – You are embarked on an exciting growth challenge where you leave a constricting carapace behind. Sometimes the “shell” was protective and served for a time to keep you safe while you matured. You don’t need to disparage the old you, or the old relationship; it served its purpose. Often people who have been through a trauma say afterwards they wouldn’t change the past, because they treasure and embrace the person they’ve become.

    Models & Mentors – “Argue for your limitations, and sure enough, they’re yours” – Richard Bach

    “The world is an illusion we must take seriously.”
    – Aldous Huxley

    “The light at the end of the tunnel is not an illusion – the tunnel’s the illusion” – Alysse Aallyn

    “Separation from each other is an optical illusion of reality” – Albert Einstein

    ‘Limit, like fear, is often an illusion” – Michael Jordan

    Mantra – “I accept reality”

    Meditation –

    #Haiku: Schism

    In the multiverse
    Heartbreak is
    Mitosis to create
    Extra selves

  • #DreamTherapy – Dream Journaling with Alysse Aallyn

    Success – Do you dream of adulation? Applause? Accomplishments? Trophies? Rewards? Or are you really dreaming of receiving Universal Love? When we wake, we feel faintly embarrassed, as if we have “given ourselves away”. Could it be that the very idea of “success” is something of a mirage?

      Success Is However You Define It – Abraham Lincoln famously said people are about as happy as they make up their minds to be. If we define “success” as adulation by others haven’t we given away ultimate power over our lives? Many people define success in material ways – it’s the only way to explain the salaries CEO’s pay themselves, while publicly admitting nobody “needs” that much money. They don’t seem to be using it very responsibly either, so I judge them to be “unsuccessful.” Clearly the most important person to please is yourself and the challenge is: are you content now, and what would it take to make you so?

      Challenge – If success is “arrival”, doesn’t that imply a “finish line”? Do you really want to be finished? Do we want to be in constant progress, just reaching for the goal – or does that imply a treadmill? A “rat race”, in fact? Isn’t the ultimate success “contentment”? To be content we must assess our lives and come to terms with our missteps. Sometimes we discovered something even more wonderful than we didn’t even know we were searching for.

      Danger – Our scarcity-oriented society views everything as a competition, and the fundamental danger is that you end up comparing your INSIDES (i.e., how you feel) with everyone else’s “outsides” (i.e., how they LOOK.) You can see that’s nonsensical. We don’t see each other’s sadness and pain, only display and showmanship.

      Opportunity – Feel compassion for the hurt and struggle of others. Feel compassion (and forgiveness) for your own hurt and struggle. Assess your place on life’s path. Maybe you’re still on the edge of some great discovery, if so, keep going! Maybe it’s time to take stock of how far you’ve come, have a look at the big map and refresh your goals. Open your Dream Journal and give yourself a high five. My goals are, dreaming, thinking, reading and writing. I do exactly what I want to most days, surrounded by love. Feels like success to me.

      Models & Mentors – “without continual growth & progress, such words as improvement, achievement and success have no meaning” – Benjamin Franklin

      “Beauty in the struggle, ugliness in success’
      – Jermaine Cole

      “Start where you are. Use what you have. Do what you can” – Arthur Ashe

      “There is always light – if we’re brave enough to see it, we’re brave enough to be it “ – Amanda Gorman

      “Rules for success: 1. Believe in your ideas 2. Pick good people 3. Earn Respect 4. Always be a student 5. Enjoy what you do 6. Ask for advice 7. Learn to say No 8. Create the best products 9. Don’t take things personally 10. Create the future”
      – Bill Gates

      Mantra – ‘Refreshed”

      Meditation –

      #Haiku: Success

      Mountain summits
      Have another side
      Where sun shines
      And gravity
      Helps

    1. #DreamTherapy – Dream Journaling with Alysse Aallyn

      Healing Rituals – Are you a believer in magic? Do you dream of restoration, of nostalgia, of lost youth? The world is a garden. In our Garden, just as the light begins to fade, we observe Tea Ceremony. For the last three thousand years, an infusion of yellow chrysanthemum, wolfberry and honey clears anger and stress and quiets heart and brain. The tea is drunk from translucent porcelain cups with delicate gold tracery. Hot water is repeatedly added until the delicious floral scent is gone. Darkness falls, and we bow to one another before departing. If we can bear it, we touch each other’s hands.

      We Cannot Diagnose Ourselves – Healing and diagnosis alike come from the lips of another. It has been scientifically proven that plants respond to kind words. We yearn for the laying on of hands, for the intricate ceremonies that pass us from one stage of life to another.

      Challenge – We CAN heal ourselves – in fact, some would argue that the “medicine” will not work unless we “accept” healing spiritually. We need to feel “worthy” of restoration. What are we punishing ourselves for? Open your Dream Journal and think deeply. They say you are only as “young” as you feel. Are we only as “healthy” as we allow ourselves to be? Forgive yourself. Accept change. Contrary to your fears, change keeps us young.

      Danger – Healing cannot occur in an atmosphere of self-hatred and self-blame, but many of us are STILL “blaming” ourselves for unlucky genetic, social and medical outcomes. “Fundamental attribution error” consists of blaming individuals for group effects. We are all caught up in the machinery of temporality. Never forget that we are souls who happen to have bodies, not bodies who happen to have souls.

      Opportunity – “Restoration” is such a glorious promise that the early Christians found themselves ensnared in decades of argument about PHYSICAL resurrection. How would it work in cases of burning and dismemberment, exactly? It is easy to laugh at these painfully ridiculous theological conflicts. One is reminded of St. Joan of Arc’s response to interrogators at her trial who asked if angels appeared naked – “Do you think God cannot afford to clothe his angels?” Accept the power accorded to you by the universe. Accept the strength of your own mind, the control of your attitude, and step into the Miracle Bath offered you by the world’s oceans.. Healing is not just possible, it is a life-force in which we can all participate. Jesus came to us as a healer.

      Models & Mentors – “Healing yourself is connected with healing others”
      – Yoko Ono

      “What happens when people open their hearts? They get better.”
      – Haruki Murakami

      Your body cannot heal without play. Your mind cannot heal without laughter. Your soul cannot heal without joy.” ~ Catherine Rippinger Fenwick

      “We are healed of suffering only if we experience it to the full – Marcel Proust

      “Maybe the dragons in our lives are princesses”
      – Rainer Maria Rilke

      Mantra – “I heal”

      Meditation:

      #Haiku: Inheritance

      You were born with
      Enough:
      The right to
      Breathe
      Speak
      Learn
      Work
      Eat
      Love
      Heal
      Live

    2. #DreamTherapy – Dream Journaling with Alysse Aallyn

      Addiction – Do you dream of imprisonment? Blank walls? Chains? Our neurocircuitry mandates habit-making behavior, but our intelligence usually recognizes when we are trapped, and our dreams send distress signals.

      There’s No Escaping Addiction – But we have tremendous choice over what we become addicted to. Visit an AA meeting and the consumption of sugar and tobacco is outright alarming. Are you addicted to gambling? Do you work in sales? Were you raised in a ritualistic faith? We easily become dependent on praise, on safety, on gratification, and our brains (and our general health) show our dependency. They threaten us when the “treat” is withdrawn.

      Challenge – Open your Dream Journal and list your “Necessary sources of supply: substances and activities you can’t live without. Are you co-dependent? (Addicted to people.) Who? If you fear you are approaching a cliff-edge, you probably are. One test is to go on a “retreat” where your customary gratifications are not available, and attempt to form new gratifications. See what happens! This is such a good idea, we should build it into our lives, periodically. Just to keep us from the cliff-edge. Open-mindedly try all “freeing’ methods until you seize the one that works for you.

      Danger – There is always the chance that we will lose our autonomy. We may want to change, we know we SHOULD change, but we CAN’T. We need outside help. This is the purpose of interventions, to demonstrate to our eyes and ears that we are harming ourselves and our relationships. Denial is a powerful defense mechanism, especially when we think we’ve finally found a substance/process that “magically” allows us to live on our particular cliff-edge – a dangerous job, risky sexual behaviors, threat-filled recreational behaviors. We then have the choice of refusing to listen – giving up our relationships to keep up our self-abuse. Some hardened wretches tell anyone who listens that life itself isn’t worth it without their life-threatening self-abuse. Numbing themselves is the way they “choose” to die.

      Opportunity – You not only CAN free yourself, you MUST. It is a spiritual obligation to live this life as an enlightenment opportunity. Are you familiar with the saying, “Live simply so that others may simply live”? It means sharing honestly with others. That means studying your consumption, and scheduling time to be alone with the universe and with God, to check on the hardiness of your Soul.

      Models & Mentors – “You can’t defeat the darkness by keeping it caged inside you” – Seth Adam Smith

      “All addictions are ways to not feel our feelings”
      – Ellen Burstyn

      “Sometimes you can only find heaven by backing slowly away from hell”
      – Carrie Fisher

      “Success is the sum of small efforts, repeated day in and day out”.

      – Robert Collier

      “The most common way people give up their power is thinking they don’t have any” – Alice Walker

      Mantra – “I feel my life”

      Meditation –

      #Haiku: Addiction

      Brain cells beggared;
      Lovelorn
      Oxytocin receptors misfire
      “Feed me!”

    3. #DreamTherapy – Dream Journaling with Alysse Aallyn

      Enlightenment – Are you a detective, trying to solve problems in your dreams? Do you dream of puzzles, labyrinths, mysteries, locked rooms? Do you unearth ruins and dig up buried corpses? You long to break into the second level of knowing – you can feel that it’s out there – where the dark falls away from your eyes and you see the world truly.

      “Woke” is a jeer from those who fear consciousness. We are all born into a condition of yearning. As children, we try desperately to understand the world we find ourselves in. This quest for enlightenment is the very reason we need to decipher our dreams! We know there is a message out there for us, we also know we have the capacity to understand it, but we are waiting for the lightning strike of “enlightenment” to put it all together.

      The Truth Is Simple – Jesus said we must become children again to enter the kingdom of heaven. This certainly implies that “enlightenment” is more a state of mind than any specific received wisdom. Open your Dream Journal and list “Ten Things I Didn’t Understand” from your childhood. Then describe the changes that took place in your thinking that explained those conundrums to you. Then list your Next 10 Mysteries. See where we’re going with this? You will – someday soon –be able to transition into the new phase of reality where those mysteries disappear.

      Challenge – Enlightenment literature recommends two things: a good teacher and time alone. Every night when we go to sleep we enter the alone-time of our own mind. We can prep ourselves in advance with some “good teaching”; Socrates, Plato, Montaigne, Eckhart Tolle, Pema Chodron, Deepak Chopra, Stephen Batchelor, the Dalai Lama –savor some of these writings until you get a sense of which one speaks especially to you. Then set aside twenty-minutes or a half an hour for reading (or listening) right before sleep.

      Danger – Zen teachers say that if anyone represents themselves as a Zen teacher they are not. Gnostic gospels say prophets asking for money are false prophets. These ideas suggest that the search for a guru is fraught with landmines. This is why I mention specific names of teachers available at any library who will not be trying to gain ascendance or dominance over you personally. Be aware of giving your spirit into another’s care. The sin against the Holy Ghost is the only sin that cannot be forgiven, and it is the sin of ruining or attempting to ruin one’s spiritual receptors. Once that trust is destroyed, it is difficult to “become a child again” because of the terrible things we have known and seen.

      Opportunity – Healing is always available. Even when we have been scarred by false prophets there is the magic of universal love and resilience available to us. A variety of healing ceremonials – my favorite is the “miracle bath” and the “laying on of hands” – will reconnect u to the possibilities of joy, love and the insight leading to enlightenment.

      Models & Mentors -. “Knowing others is wisdom, knowing yourself is enlightenment.” – Lao Tzu

      “Enlightenment is your felt state of Oneness with Being” – Eckhart Tolle

      “The road to enlightenment is long and difficult and you should not forget snacks and magazines” – Anne LaMott

      “Suffering is temporary, enlightenment is forever” – Buddha

      “Enlightenment does not come from the mind, it comes from just being. You are already enlightened. You have to realize it to allow it into your experience”-
      Anita Moorjani

      Mantra – “I awaken”

      Meditation –

      #Haiku: Enlightenment

      Dissolution reassembles;
      Enlightened wave knows
      It’s
      Ocean

    4. #DreamTherapy – DreamJournaling with Alysse Aallyn

      The Rose – Vulnerability – Do you have frequent nightmares? Do you feel helpless in your dreams? Do you dream of children, of your own childhood? In DreamTherapy, the rose represents the soft evanescence of youth when the merest thumbprint of emphasis leaves an eternal impression. As the emblem of beauty, the Rose warns us that this quivering, temporary vulnerability may be the very definition of value as of loveliness.

      We Remember – You well recollect how you were molded. Is it a pleasant nostalgic vision or a horror story? Do you resent all the other actors in this drama? Remember, resentment is a poison we consume – we are the only ones it harms.

      Challenge – Can you turn the building blocks of your own past into a constructive, hopeful framework for the future? Can you mentally accept and explore the beauty of maturity? Let’s open Dream Journal and sketch out the ways.

      Danger – The philosophy that we are “ruinable” is a psychic snare. Terrible things do happen to ordinary people and we can be changed forever; but that is growth. You don’t want to return to a previous incarnation. We may wish specific things hadn’t happened but must keep in mind that regret prevents us from focusing on future reality. We need to understand the world we’re in NOW and map it for those who follow after. Often we can offer our pattern to help others avoid the traps we fell into. In the meantime, we can access history and literature to explore coping mechanisms around disaster and the strong people it produces.

      Opportunity – Resilience is the art we cultivate. We soon realize resilience has its own beauty; one rose may be cut down but the plant is hardly dead, in fact it offers an outpouring of constant roses. That is true beauty.

      Models & Mentors – “Vulnerability is the birthplace of love, belonging, joy, courage, empathy, and creativity”

      • Brene Brown

      “Being vulnerable is the only way to allow your heart to feel true pleasure”
      – Bob Marley

      “Sometimes you have to drop your guard so your heart can breathe”

      – Emma Xu

      “The strongest love is the love that can demonstrate its fragility” – Paulo Coelho

      Mantra – “I transplant”

      Meditation –

      #Haiku: Vulnerability

      Hardening’s spontaneous
      & painful;
      Softening’s practiced;
      & free.

    5. #DreamTherapy – Dream Journaling with Alysse Aallyn

      Dependency – Do you dream of abandonment? Ruined gardens? Clinging vines? Are you afraid of being alone? In our dreams, we are reminded of all of the unpleasant aspects of needing others’ constant support in order to function. The clinging vine can’t stand up by itself, it needs an immoveable shoulder to cling to. We Americans prefer the fantasy of independence and self-determination. It’s just too threatening to imagine what might happen if the wall we’ve been clinging to ever comes down.

      No One Stands Alone – The truth is, we’re all in this together. Billionaires, leaders, CEO’s, all actually need more support than we do. So it’s time to divest of pointless shame and acknowledge the truth that humans are, for good and ill, social creatures. Open your Dream Journal and take a good look at your dependencies. Are there any that are no longer serving you? How about those who depend on you? How many are burdens? What pleasures and meanings make those burdens lighter?

      Challenge – The more we cling to a fantasy of who we are, the less we can see the true reality. List your actions for just one day and look at them in terms of ”dependencies” – bank, mail system, social security? Vehicle, gas availability, fuel affordability? Grocery stores, restaurants, our own two ambulatory feet? Weather, peace, law enforcement?

      Danger – Refusing to recognize the fragility of these systems is one danger; the ruthlessness confronting our fear creates is another. We are accustomed to the American need to muster a personal armory just in case the daily struggle for existence becomes a shoot-out; imagine the long-term effects THAT fantasy will have.

      Challenge – How can we free ourselves? What could we do to claim more psychic and physical independence? Mormons require a “year’s worth” of canned goods in the basement, the rest of us recognize the need for an emergency savings account. We are beginning to understand how a threatened supply chain can snap. Begin imagining some future failure scenarios and hash out the possibilities; if the elevator fails, is it possible to take the stairs? Your dream life will reward you with a lessening of existential anxiety.

      Models & Mentors – “Don’t set yourself on fire to keep other people warm” – Alysse Aallyn

      “Fear is the memory of pain. Addiction is the memory of pleasure. Freedom is beyond both.” – Anonymous

      “Don’t work harder on someone else’s problems than they do”

      – Ross Rosenberg

      “Enjoy togetherness but allow space. Respect differing beliefs. Accept, don’t try to change each other. Appreciate the other, but always be prepared to survive alone” – Darlene Lancer

      Mantra – “I can”

      Meditation –

      #Haiku: The Clinging Vine

      Lean too hard we’ll
      Fall together
      Allow freedom, we’re both
      Supported