Alysse Aallyn

Tag: #EternalEmpowerment

  • #DreamTherapy – Dream Journaling with Alysse Aallyn

    Night – Balance – We are different people in our dreams. We wake up amazed, even ashamed, of the things we wanted, said, did. Who are we, really? Are we the wishes and fears that rush through our subconscious or are we our daytime selves?


    The answer is – we are both. We must balance between the flood of desires and objectives that sleep flushes out.

    For everything there is a season,
    a time for every activity under heaven.

    
A time to be born and a time to die.
    

    A time to plant and a time to harvest.


    A time to kill and a time to heal.
    A time to tear down and a time to build up.


     A time to cry and a time to laugh.
    A time to grieve and a time to dance.


     A time to scatter stones and a time to gather stones.
    A time to embrace and a time to turn away.


     A time to search and a time to quit searching.
    A time to keep and a time to throw away.

    
A time to tear and a time to mend.
    A time to be quiet and a time to speak.


     A time to love and a time to hate.
    A time for war and a time for peace. Ecclesiastes 3

    Balance is a key law of nature to avoid the dreaded death-like stagnancy. Once our conscious is in harmony with our subconscious, our dreams will balance our waking life. In dreams we try on many lives. Even the worst nightmare can be looked at objectively, as a story with potential significance.

    Moderation in All Things – said Hesiod, the Roman poet 750 BC and its still good advice. We use balance as a whetstone to sweeten our pleasures and soften our griefs; torrents that are otherwise unsurvivable.

    Challenge – We need to set up our brain’s “reward system” to handle pleasure and suffering or we will be prescribed drugs in an attempt to achieve the same effect chemically. Drugs can be useful as training wheels; ideally we want to teach our systems to achieve the same effect naturally. Calm is the first step to balance, so we must learn to calm ourselves. Meditation and yoga offer the best methods for reliable self-soothing. First we assert calm over our breath, then our bodies, lastly our thoughts. It’s not that difficult! Reminder: we do it every night as we fall asleep.

    Danger – Unfortunately our contemporary life has become a competitive pursuit of “highs”. A good life well-lived provides natural highs – learning a sport, falling in love, listening to music, having children, enjoying the grandeurs of nature. Our intellect teaches us that every “high” is dramatically enriched by thinking and planning! That’s why we are called the species “homo sapiens.” Therein lies the benefit of Dream Journal.

    The pursuit of highs without the thinking, planning, consolidating and enshrining stages always leads to excess and grief. Highs for their own sake inevitably disappoint, leading to a pursuit of more and more dangerous highs, which, if we are not thinking about them, sharing them with others and incorporating them into our beings, damage our core ability to experience joy.

    Opportunity – Joy that is held in the mind and considered is joy endlessly re-experienced. It will be yours forever, and you will be able to share it with all the people you love for the rest of your life. Conscious dreaming (often called lucid dreaming) provides the best avenue to filter these experiences down to your subconscious level. Always have a joy to think about just as you are going to sleep, and another for when you are waking up. This will sharpen your apprehension of ecstasy and deepen your life.

    Models & Mentors – “The key is not to prioritize what’s on your schedule but to schedule your priorities” – Stephen Covey

    “Don’t get so busy making a living that you forget to make a life” – Dolly Parton

    Mantra – “I balance”

    Meditation –

    #Haiku: Stability

    To assert balance;
    Employ wealth of
    Eternal universal mind

  • #DreamTherapy – Dream Journaling with Alysse Aallyn

    Paradise – Bliss – What is your definition of paradise? Do you find yourself dreaming of a tropical getaway? If you wanted to find your bliss, where would you look? You’ve become your own Dream Journal. Define heaven; raise consciousness or lack of consciousness? Would you want to know what is happening in the world or would you want to be removed from the world? Can you be happy if you know there is suffering anywhere?

    We create our own Heaven every day. As we mature, we either elevate or denigrate our consciousness. We are creating “heaven”, or “hell” – our choice. Which direction are you tending? Which direction do you want to go?

    Are You Heaven Material? When we are young, we obsess about whether we are really liked or loved, whether we are really “popular.” As we get older we slowly realize that people like/love to the extent of their spiritual and emotional ability/depth. Shallow people offer very shallow love – nothing can take root there. It can flip in an instant. If the whole purpose of life on this planet – a struggle by any standard – is for humans to become more like God then we are being challenged to create the kind of emotional and psychic depth that understands and accepts everyone’s struggle, everyone’s challenge.

    Challenge – Bliss is a provable psychic state of timeless ecstasy mapped by “alpha waves” which can be seen in the brain. This state is called “flow”. We drift outside ourselves and belong to the universe. This is such a happy condition we long to cultivate and re-experience it, which we can do by immersing ourselves in art, meditation, love, sexual/emotional union, or deep thought.

    Danger – We bounce between self-obsession and living entirely in and through other people. Neither condition is optimal, although there are times in our lives when these states are necessary. Balance – sometimes called moderation – is the key. We are in the group, but we are not “the group”. We can elevate the group with the power of our Soul or we can drag it down through thoughtless mirroring. Some people choose to never develop a self. They pass from group to group, trying to “fit in” and quell the inner voice that says. “this isn’t right.” This is a violation of our basic human mandate: to develop a soul that is worthy of God.

    Opportunity – You are on a hero’s quest: you are the hero and the quest is for your Soul. This is both an inner and an outer quest. We have responsibilities from birth onwards; we clearly are our brother’s/sister’s keeper. We are our own keeper, too. Mistakes – sometimes devastating ones – are expected. It’s a dangerous world and we will meet more than one predator looking to make a meal of us. We must be wily as the snake and tender as the dove. Because in the end, it’s all about Love. The more you give, the more you feel.

    Models & Mentors – “Follow your bliss and walls turn into doors”
    – Joseph Campbell

    “In a state of bliss – everything is love” – Deepak Chopra

    “Joy is a connection to what matters – a sustained sense of well-being and inner peace” – Oprah Winfrey

    “I need not sell my soul to buy bliss” – Charlotte Bronte

    Mantra – “I flow”

    Meditation –

    #Haiku: Limitless Joy

    Rejoice in group fortune;
    Cherish,
    Cultivate
    Broadcast
    Generous bliss

  • #DreamTherapy – Dream Journaling with Alysse Aallyn

    Transformation – Metamorphosis – Are you a SciFi fan? Do you dream of bionic humans? Robots? Cryogenics? How about caterpillars becoming moths and butterflies? Acorns don’t look like oak trees, pollywogs don’t resemble frogs. It is quite common in nature to evolve into some unexpected form. What a metaphor for us, as Ovid’s Metamorphoses postulated centuries ago. We speculate about humans becoming invisible, disguising themselves as bats or wolves; Greek gods “became” swans and bulls to serve their purposes. Our imagination is rich with all these possibilities, as is our literature, theatre and film. At a funeral, we look at a bird invading the church is a whole new light. Is it a message? An incarnation?

    You Contain Multitudes – Every time you buy a bottle with an animal on the label you are calling on the powers of that creature just as your ancestors did. We suspect eating the flesh of creatures might confer their powers. We‘ve also heard the legend that when a human husk breathes its last, the soul escapes and may reincarnate in heaven or another life as something different, without blemish, wholly beautiful for once and for all.

    Challenge – Who’s your power animal? What supernatural gifts do you desire? Give yourself the freedom to think about the gifts you yearn for and the purposes you’d put them to. You can define yourself this way, experiment and play. You might not wish to be a dragon every day of the week, but once in a while it could be fun. How can you cultivate these gifts, desires and yearnings in your present-day life? Open your Dream Journal and spend some time considering. Don’t these dreams make you a bigger, more important person, even if nobody knows? What if they did know? How might you tell them and who would you tell?

    Danger – We don’t want to jump off buildings pretending we can fly. We’re expanding our psychic repertoire, not trying to escape into fantasy. The most commonly yearned for gift is omnipotence. But think how terrible life would be – not just for others but for YOU if your whims and fantasies were never checked? Often our wish is that we be spared the pain of growing up. But who wants to remain a toddler forever? As we get older we are REALLY coming into our own and knowing and sharing our true self. A joy not to be missed. Pity the toddler who prays to fly through the air so he doesn’t have to learn to walk and risk falling down.

    Opportunity – These metaphors are a great way to connect with others on a psychic level. It’s not just fun finding people to share our dreams and games, it’ a bonding experience. We are the Tiger people! We are the Mastodons! We are the Raptors! Every member of the team adds skills to create a Group Being who is stronger than all of us, and who could become our family and community.

    Models & Mentors – “Nothing gets transformed in your life until your mind is transformed” – Ifeanyl Enoch Onuoha

    “Every success story is a tale or adaptation, constant revision, and change”
    – Richard Branson

    “Perfection is constant transformation” – Nia Peeples

    “The secret of change is to focus all of your energy not fighting the old but building the new” – Socrates

    Mantra – “I become”

    Meditation –

    #Haiku: Transformation – Metamorphosis

    Cells
    Seed change;
    Unwilled at birth;
    Conscious in adulthood:
    What
    Will you be?

  • #DreamTherapy – Dream Journaling with Alysse Aallyn

    Chrysalis – Potential – Dreams tell us what COULD be. In the multiverse, physicists assure, everything is happening somewhere. Potential alerts us to the possibilities. The stick-colored, dead-seeming chrysalis contains nature’s most beautiful sprite, the butterfly. The invisibility of potential may discourage by daylight, but at night, the chrysalis opens and we are free.

    You Contain Multitudes – Whitman describes us, as well as himself. Be aware of the “restrictions” others eagerly place on you. Question them. Be the first in your family to — do something. Because you ARE the first in your family to be you. You are unique. In day dreams and night dreams, on conscious and unconscious levels, you explore all the odds and contingencies. Open your Dream Journal. Contact your Dream Buddies. Tell the ways.

    Challenge – Other people – often loved, needed and admired – keep trying to pin us down. They want to get to “know” us so they can “rely” on our sameness. They want us to stay where they left us, like a coat or umbrella. We will often place limits on ourselves, just to be accepted. But you are unrestrained in your dreaming imagination. Think of Max, who voyaged overnight to play with the Wild Things until he finally decided he wanted to return to his safe, warm, familiar bed. Every action you perform, every thought you think, suggests and then creates its opposite or “shadow” as Jung would say. Free yourself to consider all the alternatives. Then fly above them.

    Danger – Can we get lost? Will we become Peter Pan who was replaced and now can never come home? Fear is a valid reaction when danger is about. But danger is triggered by lack of escape. You are learning to deliberately keep all your psychic escape hatches open.

    Opportunity – Is there a fantasy that you cherish? Harry Potter, Narnia or Marvel? Expand it outwards. Insert yourself. So many discoveries have been made from and through fantasy fan fiction they are too numerous to mention here. But allowing yourself to dream is key. Imagine you are outfitting your inner butterfly. What colors? How about all colors, constantly changing?

    Models & Mentors – “The only person you are destined to be is the person you decide to become” – Ralph Waldo Emerson

    “Consult not your fears but your hopes and dreams. Think not about your frustrations but your potential. Concern yourself not with what you tried and failed but with what it is still possible for you to do.” – Pope John XXIII

    “Our essential nature is one of pure potentiality”
    – Deepak Chopra

    “Accept whatever comes and meet it with the best you have to give”

    – Eleanor Roosevelt

    Mantra – “I am many”

    Meditation –

    #Haiku: Chrysalis – Potential

    Unrecognizable:
    Disguised –
    Prototype
    Unbeing
    Becomes
    You

  • #DreamTherapy – Dream Journaling with Alysse Aallyn

    The Bridge – Discipline – Is “discipline” cruel? Is it one of your fears? Or is an orderly life what you long for but you’ve been told, because of your personality it’s completely out of reach? Do you have dreams of endless punishments at some infernal school?


    Discipline only means conforming to a plan – our map, remember? Get out your Dream Journal and study your plan, your list of wants and fears. Are you a harsh taskmaster to yourself? Why?


    Plans can be flexible – maps less so – but they are subject to change. By us. Because we’re in control.


    Nothing is achieved without discipline, which only means conforming your behavior to a previously conceived pattern but what does it mean to you? Your dreams will tell you.


    You Are Your Best Friend and Best Parent – No plan “works” in your life until you learn to practice delayed gratification and stick-to-itiveness. But first you need to feel your way through other patterns – bubbling up from the collective unconscious – some of which so hellish so you have to struggle with the source of those memories. You will need to disown them to give birth to your true self, whom you can lovingly mother. Harness your dream power to get yourself over the finish line.

      Challenge – do you treat others differently from the way you treat yourself? More or less generously? Why? We need to adapt our discipline constantly to enhance our thriving. But who’s doing the adapting – the Cruel Taskmaster, the Disgusted Lover or the Adoring, Generous Parent or the Permissive Saint? You contain all these (and they live in your dreams) , but who are you going to listen to? Who will you feed? Who has more power? Your choice controls your future. Consult appealing patterns that have worked for others and blend to taste. Develop a loving faith, and a sophisticated taste you can trust to guide you.

      Danger – Uh oh! You’ve fatally confused “discipline” with “punishment” and now are too debilitated to escape. Who said growth has to hurt?

      Opportunity – From our dreams we must summon a rescuer. Naturally that rescuer is OUR OWN TRUE SELF. In dreams sometimes it’s a hero, a fictional or historic figure or a spirit animal. Do you have a hero myth? Jack and the Beanstalk? Frozen? Joan of Arc? Read especially potent folk tales right before bed. Fall asleep imagining strengthened muscles – physical, spiritual, emotional – growing inside you. You are Jack AND the beanstalk! No giant can stand against you. Even the laziest, cruelest corner of the ego collapses to reveal itself as a Tiny Child yearning for effective mothering. We get to be the loving mother to ourselves.

      Models & Mentors – “Through self-discipline comes freedom” – Aristotle

      “Motivation gets you going, but discipline keeps you going” – John C. Maxwell

      “All success begins with self-discipline. It starts with you.” – Dwayne Johnson

      ‘Day by day – what you choose, what you think, what you do, is who you become” – Heraclitus

      Mantra – “I grow”

      Meditation –

      #Haiku: The Bridge

      Stuck:
      I’m here and you’re there.
      I’ll meet you
      Across an
      Ocean’s loneliness.

    1. #DreamTherapy – Dream Journaling with Alysse Aallyn

      Youth – Resilience – Dreaming a lot about your childhood? Your conscious mind is “mining” your subconscious for guides to the way you feel now. Did you pick the wrong path, and if so, why? Can you summon the effort to go back and fix it?

        “You’re as young as you feel” is a true saying! Ever met a “young” seeming old person? They are interested in everything. They are not frightened by new ideas. They don’t talk endlessly about their illnesses, complaints, how the world has gone to hell. They look forward to the future. The nature of “resilience” is that you “spring back”. You can actually use mistakes as energy, to improve your map-making. Surely you’re familiar with ”resistance training.” You get better muscles that way!

        Challenge – Open up your Dream Journal. How can we feel young when life keeps beating you down? The way to improve your resilience is to improve your philosophy. Do you believe people get old, they can no longer participate in the rat race, are shoveled under and it’s over? There’s a locker room inspiring pep talk. Don’t love and intelligence both REQUIRE wisdom? Adopt a philosophy that gives you hope. This is easier to do around young people. Grandparents cling to grandchildren. It’s good for both of them.

        Danger – Don’t get stuck in a “feedback loop.” Don’t hang around depressing, toxic people who mouth depressing, toxic notions. In our society old people are shunted off onto sidings, gathered together in communities that focus on “nursing”. Depressed yet? Re-orient your mind to focus on “health.” Resilience is a requirement for wounds of all types to heal.

        Opportunity – In a famous letter to Ann Landers, someone who wanted to go to medical school bewailed that they would forty years old when they got out! Forty! Landers asked, “How old will you be if you DON’T go?” Wise people all realize HOW YOUNG THE REST OF YOU really are, who are complaining about being “too old” to do what you want to do. You have plenty of time, because ALL time is NOW. Your new philosophy? “Spring back.”

        Models & Mentors – “Reasons for hope – our clever brains, the indomitable human spirit and above all, the commitment of young people when they’re empowered to take action” – Jane Goodall

        “We don’t even know how strong we are until we are forced to bring that hidden strength forward” – Isabel Allende

        “Success is not final, failure is not fatal, it is the courage to continue that counts’ – Winston Churchill

        “Hardships often prepare ordinary people for an extraordinary destiny”
        – C. S. Lewis

        Mantra – “My World Is New”

        Meditation –

        #Haiku: Resilience

        Fresh pink skin blooms
        Scarless
        Free;
        Regenerated fresh
        Every
        Morning

      1. #DreamTherapy – Dream Journaling with Alysse Aallyn

        Symbiosis – Interdependence – you can’t make it on your own. We are social beings, we need other people, all those characters peopling your dreams. We are DEPENDENT on them. This is such a tough thing to face that there are whole categories of people who go around insisting they “made it on their own.” They’re the only ones who believe it! They assemble a vast team, and not only that, they are dependent on teams set up by others to provide safety, water, heat, light. Visit a country where this isn’t a given and then you’ll realize what a massive enterprise is taking place around us.

          Flourish, Don’t Exploit – Symbiosis benefits everyone. If it leaves you “worse off” it’s not symbiosis, it’s exploitation. In our dreams we fear depredation, loss, failure, humiliation. We depend on the Collective Unconscious for the meaning in our lives. Our sleep world is the theatre where we rehearse our fears, making them LESS LIKELY to come true! We fear dependence because that means our “supply” can be cut off. But we also provide supply to others. What, and who? Any way we can improve the supply lines?

          Danger – Interdependence is a delicate balance, requiring sensitivity, reflection, and the capacity to change. Above all we want to avoid “Doomsday thinking” in which “since” the obvious entropy of the universe ruins all relationships eventually, so, by this reasoning, they must be ruined NOW. This “fear” completely overlooks the spiritual growth which time allows. Interdependence gives us insight and time and improved relationships – a recipe for emotional and intellectual thriving.

          Challenge – To become independent (i.e. free) we have to face the fact of our dependence on others and their dependence on us. Get out your Dream journal. Consult your Dream Buddies. How symbiotic are your relationships? Is there harm involved? Depredation? Abuse? Don’t make me repeat the 17 warning signs of an abusive relationship. It’s unequal, never a two-way street. Belittling? Baiting? Shaming? You should be able to recognize these techniques NOW so you can strategize a way out! If you DON’T recognize them there’s a very good chance your dreams DO. Pay attention to them. It’s possible to be abused by relationships with people we’ve never met – banks – corporations – landlords – employers – if this isn’t an equally mutual beneficial relationship we’re OUTTA HERE. (This is why authoritarians fear Cancel Culture. It reduces their depredation pool.) Yes you CAN find and foster relationships that are more beneficial.

          Opportunity – Nobody and nothing’s perfect and nobody wants that –ugh! Perfection is about stasis which is DEATH. WE are all about change, growth, evolution, becoming. Wisdom! Sharing joy! A back and forth process involving OTHER PEOPLE. Let’s work on our confidence. Let’s work on our spiritual muscle. Let’s work on our mapping abilities so we have a good idea where we’re headed. Expect surprises and greet them when they show up: “Hello old friend.”

          Models & Mentors – “Symbiotic relationship in nature teaches us cooperation and shows that we are all connected” – Sanchita Pandey

          “You are in a dynamic relationship with the universe because your existence is win-win” – Teal Swan

          ‘Symbiosis is a much higher reflection of intelligent life” – Frederick Lenz

          “Love is a positive, symbiotic, reciprocal flow between two or more entities”
          – Inga Muscio

          Mantra – “Let’s play”

          Meditation –

          #Haiku: Symbiosis = Interdependence

          I think with
          Your memory I
          Stretch with
          Your muscles
          Grasp with
          Dead hands

        1. #DreamTherapy – Dream Journaling with Alysse Aallyn

          Flight – Ingenuity – Everyone has flying dreams! In those moments, we experience absolute power and potential, which is exactly what these dreams are about. We often wake from them with a feeling of disappointed sadness: “You mean I’m earth-bound? I want to go back!’

            You are a Transformer – Your mind is a potent tool that not only solves “problems”, it transfigures them. The problem dissolves as the potential for revolution becomes clear. DreamTherapy asks us to “rise above” the problem and survey it from another angle. We soar over the difficulty! Our most powerful tool is the question: “What if?”

            Challenge – Ingenuity sees connections where others see difficulties. Ingenuity relaxes with “tinkering.” Let’s become expert at cultivating the alpha brain waves to achieve “flow” – a condition of subconscious harmony where ideas spring up and potentialities thrive. “Flow” is where true freedom resides.

            Danger – Can you “waste” your life daydreaming? I’m one of those people who says “No”! But the mind is full of traps – cultural, educational and emotional – to keep us on a sabotaging treadmill of circular reasoning that gets us nowhere. Usually you can tell this is happening when you hear a carping, intrusive “voice”: “You shouldn’t be doing this” “You’re an idiot” “That won’t work.” That’s not you talking, it’s the “Hidden Enemy” out to undermine your efforts to focus and connect. Without the confidence to dream, think and experiment you can’t become your best self.

            Opportunity – We need a supportive environment where voices saying, “You can’t do it” are drowned out by empowering affirmations. Some people use music to achieve this state, others use meditation. If the voices persist, you will have to focus on THAT as the problem and tackle them directly with a conscious daily practice of studying where they came from. Open your Dream Journal. Who are “they”? What happened to those people? Why did they attack you? Now that you are no longer a child you can usually see them for the tiny, disappointed, bitter little minds they were. These are not forces to emulate. Deliberately let them go. “I am sorry for you, but you have no power over me”.

            Models & Mentors – “No problem of human making is too great to be overcome by human ingenuity, human energy and the untiring hope of the human spirit”
            – Bill Clinton

            “Mathematical reasoning is the exercise of inspiration and ingenuity”

            – Alan Turing

            “You cannot solve a problem with the same mind that created it”

            – Albert Einstein

            “Those who do not think outside the box are easily contained”

            – Nicolas Manetta

            Mantra – “I can fly”

            Meditation –

            #Haiku: Flight

            Doubt molts aloft
            Fresh freedoms
            Foreseen; fear
            Energized –
            Wings flexed
            Jump off

          1. #DreamTherapy – Dream Journaling with Alysse Aallyn

            Memory – the Past – Do you dream frequently of past events? Are they different – worse or better – than what you remember actually happening? Do you feel nostalgia for a past that never was? Do you have a favorite period in history or fantasy universe that you wish you lived in, instead of this one?

              You are the Hero of Your Saga – Open your Dream Journal and start writing. Accept your centrality in your own myth. It doesn’t matter what other people think – they are the bit players. Think of your past as a Quest Saga. What did you want? How did it change? What blocked you? What tools have you got at your command? Where do you go from here?

              Challenge – You absolutely CAN rewrite the past, but first you first must face its full horror. Generally, because we were children, we didn’t know what was going on, were co-opted by our persecutors and prevented from fighting back. Things are different now! The hardest thing to accept is that beloved caregivers didn’t want the best for us – they wanted us to be just like them.

              Danger – “I don’t believe in ghosts but I never met a person who wasn’t haunted” is a very wise saying. What haunts you? Or who? Ghosts are malignant – if they weren’t they would be power spirits, fairy godmothers or guardian angels. What malignancies from your past are out to get you and how do they make themselves known? One of Freud’s contributions was to point out that people prefer their neurosis – ie imprisonment – to liberation. Why? What’s in it for you?

              Opportunity – You became YOU. Yes, you have scars – these are bragging rights! You have been through the wars! ‘Rewriting” the past means understanding what really happened, the limitations of those who surrounded you, and exploring your chances and choices today. Just because parents, teachers or “society” sentenced you to play a role, you can step out of it at any time. Buddhist thought is very helpful here. Buddha teaches that life itself is an illusion – a dream. It changes depending on how we think about it. In the present, inside your mind, you hold all the keys to your own liberation. Re-visit Pema Chodron’s Noble Heart and Eckhart Tolle’s Power of Now to explore how you can assume immediate control of your life and your mind and turn your past into fuel to power your growth.

              Models & Mentors – “You never know the value of a moment until it becomes a memory” – Dr Seuss

              “Nothing has happened until it’s written down” – Virginia Woolf

              “Memory is the treasury and guardian of all things” – Cicero

              “In the end, we’ll all become stories.” – Margaret Atwood

              “Your brain forms the same neural connections and muscle memory whether you are imagining a task or actually doing it”- Yo Yo Ma

              Mantra – “I remember”

              Meditation –

              #Haiku: Memory – Your Past Is Never Where You Left It

              Block Past subsuming
              Present – overwhelming
              Future
              Short circuit
              Change

            1. #DreamTherapy – Dream Journaling with Alysse Aallyn

              Cooperation – Division of Labor – Do you dream of Getting Help? You are engaged on any difficult task and Someone Else shows up to assist? Do you dream of villages and businesses running perfectly – everyone setting about their Daily Chores like the mailman, the crossing guard, the fruit seller, the fireman like characters in a children’s book? Looks like a Perfect World, doesn’t it?

                You Don’t Have to Do Everything – It’s an enormous relief when you first realize you’re not responsible for everything. Children are very solipsistic thinkers – they “assume” magical responsibility not just for parental divorce but for World Wars. But we are tiny cogs in a huge enterprise. Every task we assume is part of something much bigger. We are surrounded by helpers, if we could only see it.

                Challenge – In life we have Group Tasks and Individual Tasks. The challenge is to figure out which is which. Social pressure tends to ‘erase” our individual tasks because the daily round is so overwhelming. Yet we cling to our Personal Goals of maturation, Mastery, Learning, Finding Meaning & Bliss, Growing Love. Cooperation surrounds us in all these challenges if we could only see it.


                Danger – Our capitalist society is based on competition and scarcity. Politics wants us seeing others as competitors for scarce resources, instead of willing hands helping us build. No wonder Main Street is falling into disrepair, volunteer activities go begging and community resources are depleted! Without a sense of community we can’t see each other as anything but rivals. When looking for co-operators it is wise to re-visit the warnings of Wisdom seekers and avoid people who aren’t seeking helpers but hostages:

                1. Projection – There’ “right” and “wrong” and they’re never “wrong.” Nothing is ever their fault.
                2. Nonsensical conversations from hell – Arguers. Word salad, circular conversations, ad hominem arguments, projection and gaslighting to make them the gate-keepers of reason and you the thirsty aspirant. Prople only capable of vertical, not horizontal relationships. Someone needs to be “on top.”
                3. Blanket statements and generalizations – Thick layers of protective blather will keep you from getting through to discuss any task at hand.
                4. Misrepresenting your thoughts and feelings to the point of absurdity – You are a simplistic thinker and a deficient reasoner and they are the source of all wisdom. No cooperating with these people.
                5. Nitpicking and moving the goal posts – Different rules for everyone and every day.
                6. Changing the subject to evade accountability – “You shouldn’t have given me that job to begin with.”
                7. Covert and overt threats –“If people know what you REALLY are, say, do, no one would be your friend.”
                8. Name-calling – “Identity politics.” “You are a _” Fill in the blank. And that’s all you’ll ever be in this guy’s eyes.
                9. Destructive conditioning – Abuse, frustration and disrespect are this person’s calling cards but it’s never their fault that they live in a cloud of toxicity. They want you in there, too. Decline.
                10. Smear campaigns and stalking – “Office politics.” Need I say more?
                11. Playing the Martyr – “I have so many enemies!”
                12. Demands Immediate Unthinking Fealty – When someone stresses the fact that they are a “nice guy” or girl, that you should “trust them” right away or emphasizes their credibility without any provocation from you whatsoever, WALK AWAY.
                13. Baits and badgers you – testing your limits. Can you be made to lose control?
                14. Boundary testing – “Everyone does it” to drag you into unethical enterprise
                15. Aggressive jabs disguised as jokes – “Can’t you laugh about yourself?”
                16. Condescending sarcasm and patronizing tone – Know-It-Alls
                17. Belittling, Degrading, Shaming About ANYBODY. A very good piece of advice is watch how they treat wait staff. Underlings. Anyone totally in their power or people who can do nothing for them and you’ll soon get a picture of their inner world. Stay away.

                Opportunity – You will meet Your Best Friends Ever! This is even more important than Getting the JOB DONE! Because friends last for life and they change YOU. Reach out for advice and cooperation to all who treat others with respect. You won’t be successful ALL the time – no one is – but you will learn so much in the course of finding out How to Live In the World and Who to be.

                Models & Mentors – “The only thing that will redeem mankind is cooperation” – Bertrand Russell

                “Coming together is a beginning, keeping together is progress and working together is success” – Henry Ford

                “If I have seen further, it is by standing on the shoulders of giants”

                – Isaac Newton

                “Alone we can do so little. Together we can do so much.” – Helen Keller

                Mantra – “Go Team!”

                Meditation –

                #Haiku: Unlikely Friends

                You explain
                Each other –
                Crossed perspectives:
                Fireworks:
                Transmute –
                Osmosis