#Haiku: The Lovers
Falling upwards
Into you
My other wing, my second
Clapping hand
Tag: #Love
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The Demon Lover – a play for two voices by Alysse Aallyn
4. CALESITA –THE MERRY GO ROUND
EVA
Did I leave my diary behind?
Don’t read it, not that you would.
It’s anaphrodisiac. I am filled with envious admiration
For the way you spend your time.
It’s an incentive to work, being alone.
Diplomats are never lonely.EVAN
My bed gets so icy in the small hours of the morning –
I am losing interest in sex.
Perhaps I am already part of the spirit world.
I am in limbo and will never escape this place.The teenager remains alive in me, I have a
Panic fear of conformity
So I cast myself as the elderly rake.
I fear I’m the bore –
Marriage gets me down.EVA
When you go on and on about yourself
You’re a man I don’t recognize.
I prefer your adolescent self.
The man of the house should be a free agent.
A respected prowler
Never lonely, housebound,
Eating baked beans and drinking stewed tea.EVAN
In other countries women
Are less bossy and more decorative.
You are jealous of my life –
I am jealous of yours.EVA
Ah the pain of your reproach!
Not seeing you would kill me.
I live for the memory of our every moment.
I wouldn’t give a damn if I died tomorrow.EVAN
This is the letter I would write you if I dared,
if I weren’t frightened by the cancer
Of your wife-hatred.
I am overworked, wrung out.
Possessed by you.You make me live at the pitch of anguish.
Our love has roots in good and evil,
It lives in the darkest places of our natures
Shall we end by destroying each other?
You have the deadlier weapons.EVA
I do have a bad effect on people.
Guilt, conspiracy, love,
I cannot breathe without them.EVAN
Boredom, dissipation, remorse,
And apprehension– I can’t escape this obsessive cycle.
Beneath the controlled surface of my mind
Opportunities to be frenzied are endless.
I’m afraid of saying something ruthless which many stick.EVA
This place is full of you.
I can no longer look at hyacinths
Gratitude for our happiness chokes me.
The restlessness of pleasure going to waste.
Missing you is like an illness.EVAN
If there’s a worm in this bud
Who is the corruptor?
Your insights are so powerful they alter mine.EVA
I believe we should exchange rings.
Is this a faux pas? Would your wife object?
I need something in case you die of your itch or
I fall out of an airplane.I wonder why Elayna’s throat won’t heal?
I believe she is ice-bound.
Sealing you away from life.EVAN
You witch, you have
Frozen poor Elayna’s throat.
I begged you not to. You make all
Suffering physical.EVA
Elayna’s frozen her own throat –
I wish you’d see it.
Depression is hallucinatory.
Guilt and sorrow undermine my confidence,
I refuse to give them credence.EVAN
I’m grateful when we talk calmly,
Our fearful scenes seem so long ago.
I’m sure the panic of youth has played its part.
I used to hope you would love me less over time
But now I think we love each other equally.EVA You are so near me I feel we are one person.
I feel you now beside me.
I will make you real.EVAN
I feel your longing
As I fear your signaling.
I owe you happiness
But I can’t express it.
We must believe life is as beautiful as music
Says it is.EVA
The illusions we cultivate are
A form of courage.
Forget my deficiencies
Find amusement in the worldly game. -
The Demon Lover – a play for two voices by Alysse Aallyn
2 – Cadena – Enchainment
EVAN
A happy guilty day full of betrayals
Kept me in an extraordinary state
Of fascination. I’ve lied to everyone for
So long, I feel certain that truth
Is beyond me.EVA
I’d rather see you dead at my feet
Than dead ON your feet.
That would be a mercy killing –
The last unbearable agony –
Wondering if you existed at all.I have small talent for this.
I have disgraced my idealism,
Pretending boredom can be fruitful.
Waiting, waiting for you everywhere. I
Wake one day to find I’ve lost my looks, my hair,
fascination, brain – everything.EVAN
You’re only waking up
In an empty hotel.
The light is always different
The morning after.
This is what middle-aged people do.
I love the brutality of your world.
You never fade. You are my word made flesh.EVA
You are my religion.
Until In fell in love with you I was 25 inside.
I lived in a world of dreams and theories.
Your experiences seem realer to me than mine.EVAN
Social instinct is my religion.
You have the bravery and intelligence
Men are supposed to have
But never do.
To have touched the same places
Is a bond between us.
I never think of my deficiencies –
Or how could I forgive myself?EVA
Middle-aged people go to weddings
Out of perverse fascination for the bride.
I was that bride –
My day was all champagne.
Anaesthetized
It doesn’t hurt so much.
Such a sense of enormity came over me
I almost fainted. I gave Allen the dirtiest look: “You caused this.”
Without a wedding dress
I was a restless, dowdy snob.
People were falling in love left and right –
Even in decaying marriages.
I wanted that –
He read my subtext.
And I was caught.EVAN
These dreary parties have a decaying effect.
My loneliness for you is like a whiplash.
Your absence is a bitter injury
But nothing can injure our love –
We’re too strong for them.
I’m silenced till I hear from you.
If I let myself go I would feel desperate.
I can’t bear you’re going to France without me –
But –
isn’t love our country?EVA
I won’t say “I’ll die if you don’t come”
Because I know you would come if you possibly could.
What a skeleton in the cupboard a wife is.EVAN
Don’t be jealous of Elayna. You are the only goal
Toward which my life is tending.
You are the meaning of my life.
I could never live for work alone.EVA
You enlarge my soul.
In your mind is my existence.
You’re more real to me than me.
I’m in a peculiar psychic state.
It’s an atmosphere of illusion.
I envy Elayna all the time.
It drips like an irritant over my nerves.EVAN
What of Allen? You
Have your worse half too.
I don’t waste my time
Being jealous of him.EVA
Oh, Allen spends time lost in woods,
Falling in love with trees. He’s
No threat to anyone.EVAN
To understand one’s destiny
One needs a framework for this mass of experience.
How can I live separated from you?
If I stopped caring for you
I couldn’t care for anything.I need my wife, her whip-cracking organization.
I loathe living in the squalor I get to on my own.
Having breakfast OUT of bed is the last horror.
Miasmic feelings of impossibility and terror. Help me.EVA
We help each other
By existing. Except for God I have no help but you.
Our love is growing more formidable as our unshakeable belief
Grows stronger. Like grace, it renews itself.
All yesterday I glowed. My inability to accept your wife
Is my deformity – help me with it.
The light of our love is the only light for me. -
Sleeping Orchid – Creative Boot Camp for Sensitives & Empaths with Alysse Aallyn
Miracles – Love
If This Archetype Chooses You – You are surrounded by magical possibilities. Are you dreaming of eternal bliss? Floating in connectedness? In Love the boundaries of the other disappear, all is forgiveness. Merge fearlessly, knowing you will be able to get yourself back any time, soothed, improved, and healed.
We Are Creatives for Love – Love is the spirit that animates the empty spaces between humans. Once charged, these spaces become a powerful force for growth and change – uncharged they are so much dead air. This is the space that creatives protect. Love is the longing to be truly alive and to share life with the Blissed, Blessed Others.
Our Yearning Defines and Connects Us – As children we thought we knew about miracles but it seems we have forgotten. As creatives we fight for our ancestral memories of trust and closeness. How we long to be reminded of the ecstasy of selflessness, to re-experience the borderlessness between creatures that makes a dead universe come alive.
Love Is Our Armor – It’s a spiral, our labyrinth, remember? We can’t go back, we can only go forward. We practice techniques and invent others as we design and redesign purposeful maps in a threatening and uncertain world. We have the collective confidence of all the brilliance of the creatives who came before us. Someone loved us once, eternalizing the golden moment, now we can re-create and perpetuate that magic by creating our own miracles.
Creative Danger – Danger lies in narrowing, exclusionary definitions of what ‘can’t” happen, what “won’t” work. Creatives explode restrictions all the time. Love must ever open outwards. As soon as we turn Love into a zero-sum game with a shut-off valve focused on our own narrow gratification, Love dies.
Creative Opportunity – Love Is always a Miracle – It can restore the dead to life. It can open minds, it can awaken hearts. The possibilities of a creative are endless because we have chosen, with our flexibility and our sympathetic understanding, to be endless. Close your eyes and assume yoga’s starfish pose. We are open to what the universe longs to teach and once we commit to pass it on, we form an unbreakable chain, free at last from the bonds and the limits of selfishness. Clasp the hand (or paw) that generously, trustingly takes hold of yours. Let’s venture forth together.
Models & Mentors – ‘to love and be loved is to feel the sun from both sides”
– David Viscott“Miracles don’t happen to you, they happen through you.” – Mary Davis
“Love has nothing to do with what you are expecting to get, only what you are expecting to give, which is everything” – Katherine Hepburn
“Love gives you a piece of your soul you never knew was missing” – Torquato Tasso
“You’ve got to see the miracle to be the miracle.” – Jandy Nelson
“Love is the gift of oneself” – Jean Anouilh
“I love you for who I am when I’m with you”
– Elizabeth Barrett Browning#Haiku: Love Transfer
The secret of breaking
Any bad habit
Is to love
Something more -
Butterfly Language for Caterpillars – Soulmate Seeking with Alysse Aallyn
The Daisy = LOVE “Is love real?” “Love Waves”
Love is the secret. Love is the answer. Love is what we say we feel when we look into the Soulmate’s eyes According to our long, rich tradition of romantic literature, it’s a connection/identification with someone else so powerful (and so rewarding) you would walk through fire for that person.
Biblically defined as:
“Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres”
Love is the opposite of the winner/loser “fuck you” ethos.
Love is patient. We can’t expect the Soulmate to be on the same page with us immediately, or all the time. We must work out our differences, analyze our difficulties and strategize solutions. Love takes time.
Love is kind. We handle each other gently, with care. Thoughtfully, with reverence. Slowly. Savoring.
Love does not envy. We are not competitive with each other. When we wrestle, it is in play, for joy, not because we want to trounce the Soulmate or knock the feet out from under the Beloved.
Love does not boast. We are not seeking to impress each other. Love is not a hierarchy where we can lift our status above the Loved One.
Love is not proud. We can admit fault. We can say we are sorry. We can weep with the Beloved and we can begin again.
Love does not dishonor others. There is no “score”, no winner and no loser. We don’t take tattletales of the Beloved to friends, family, social media or the public space.
Love is not self-seeking. It is not transactional: “what can I get out of this” “you are not giving enough” “you are not making me look good.”
Love is not easily angered. We resist anger, touchiness, rage over our wounded narcissistic self-importance. If we are angry we cannot join, touch each other, embrace whole-heartedly or solve problems. When you get angry over a problem, now you have two problems.
Love keeps no record of wrongs. When we say, “I forgive you”, we mean it.
Love does not delight in evil. We do not seek the diminishment or disrespect of the other. Popular “bondage” and “sadism” games that memorialize the helplessness and subjection of the Other are dangerous, volatile and can be triggers of past dangers and will map out a bleak and lonely future.
Love rejoices in the truth. The truth evolves because our brains evolve. Truth is a process as our lives are a process. We are all heading for an end goal – both together and separately – if we can figure out what it is. Truth is our ally in this dilemma, because it tells us the real results of all our strategies which allows us to calibrate our efforts and improve our outcomes. We must speak truth to each other and we must grow in stature enough to dare to speak truth to Power.
Love protects. We shelter. We nourish. We steward. We cherish. We assess. We unite.
Love always trusts. We believe. We have the best assurance that God is good and that truth, justice and love will win in the end.
Love always hopes. Things will get better tomorrow. We will work towards constant improvement.
Love perseveres. We will never quit. We are in this for the long haul.
Meditation: I am part of all I have met – Tennyson
#Haiku: Love Waves
Sound travels forever
Like love;
Stars’ boundless dance
Launched
By mortal hearts
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Butterfly Language for Caterpillars – Soulmate Seeking with Alysse Aallyn
Hummingbird = THE SOUL “The Hummingbird”
“Is Love Eternal?”
“Hope is the thing with feathers.”
-Emily DickinsonHummingbirds are impossible. They can fly backwards, forwards and upside down. They can move their wings in a figure 8. The blinding whir of fast-moving iridescent feathers creates the “hum” that gave them their name. Hummingbirds have fast metabolisms and must lick nourishment all day long.
Hummingbirds are carnivores, and they migrate long distances. Their feet are used for perching only, not for hopping or walking. They are strongly territorial and have been known to chase hawks away. They don’t expect a medal for it either. I’m guessing a hawk would be seriously unsettled by this dive-bombing ruby and have the sense to leave. If hummingbirds can do all this, what’s our excuse? As I say, hummingbirds are impossible.
Love is an energy and as such is subject to many of the laws of energy. It can be wasted, it can be vitiated, it can run down. But when Love meets its Soulmate the two loves join together to become a Force that invigorates the Soul, that
essence of our personhood that is immortal. Each of us is a single wing, and working together to lift each other up we are likelier to soar.Some theories of reincarnation suggest that we don’t so much remember past lives as “recognize” aspects of ourselves in history. Psychologists call that recognition more a process of identification and learning. I propose another idea; which is that souls recognize each other. This is what lies behind those magic moments we “suddenly” share with others, where we “understand” without knowing how we got there. It feels instinctual that a connection has been formed.
We need to live as if the present moment is eternal because that is the true path to immortality. That means dialing up the love and pushing away the fear, along with the mad scramble towards the future.
What if we were enough and we have always been enough? Your soul has been waiting to speak to you. What might it say? What does your partner’s soul say? What do your souls say together?
HAIKU: The Hummingbird
don’t you dare
underestimate me
am I small or are you
oversized? -
The Language of Butterflies – Walking the Path of Attachment with Alysse Aallyn
MELT into the space your desire creates: “You Got This”
You’ve realize the immensity of your need and the enormity of the challenge. You’ve looked into your capacities and they just don’t seem to match your expectations. Now you’re scared and feeling hopeless. I’m here to remind you to “relax.” Melt into the space your desire has created. Untense those muscles because fear and hysteria, rage and feelings of worthlessness all work against us.Realize somewhere out there your Soulmate is feeling all these things also. This is a process you need to go through, in order to recognize the vastness of the challenge ahead. This is your time in the desert, where you will be tested. This guarantees that when your and your Beloved melt together your success will be all the sweeter. Of necessity to valuing the Other is the realization that, although there may be plenty of fish in the sea, you need a very particular fish.
HAUNTED WEDDING
The pregnant car disgorges
Only us. It’s winter.
Drunk as silver fish
We beat our gills as light
As hummingbirds.
In an amethyst ring
Of drypoint trees
The half-built house
Gapes and swells
Its timbers stink of sap.
Windrill fields occlude
Our crossing, so you carry me
High above the thorny osiers.
We sleep aloft for safety
Locked and levitating
In this space of air
One season only,
Unseen by angry outriders;
Bloodless in our wedding robes
Like the doubled membranes
Of the frozen flowers.
Alysse Aallyn 